morons

More “Who Cares?” News From KSDK’s Leisa Zigman: Wedding Day Flub

Posted on October 15, 2009 | The Editor

Of course you want your wedding day to be perfect, but guess what? Not gonna happen. Everyone has something weird or crappy happen. Admittedly, some are worse off than others, but its always something. For instance our first whirlwind marriage with super model Heidi Klum (Don’t ask her about. She’ll pretend like she won’t know what you are talking about.) was totally ruined when I was arrested outside her, I mean our, bathroom window for just standing there with a locket of my future wife’s hair and all those photos of us…well they are just of her, but someone has to take the photo, with the telephoto lens, from my van. [Read More]

F*ck You Dodger Fans

Posted on October 12, 2009 | The Editor

Our St. Louis tipsters have been sending us the link to this video over and over again this weekend, and it really is totally f*cked up. When you first start to watch it you may say, “Hey no mister! Don’t blast all Dodger fans for one asshole!” To that I say, keep watching…eventually the whole section shows its true colors: Dodger Dickhead Blue. Warning: Mumbled NSFW language. Hot Chick Owned in Bleacher Fight – Watch more Funny Videos [Read More]

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Mizzou Forgets How Cell Phones Work

Posted on October 1, 2009 | The Editor

So say you are an important guy in some respects and because of that, you have a lot of phone numbers and text messages on your phone. Now say you get a new phone, which all of us seem to do about once a month these days. Wouldn’t you make sure to clear out your old phone before getting rid of it? Of course you would, because you aren’t from 1977, you know what a cell phone is, and you aren’t a moron…or at least a big enough one to think that someone might take a peak in your important by proxy phone! [Read More]

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The First Rule of Gun Safety is Do Not Talk About Gun Safety

Posted on September 23, 2009 | The Editor

James Looney (no, not the Dodgers player. He only has one ‘o’.) decided to show his girlfriend how to use a gun the other day. Clearly the lesson plan wasn’t sinking in, so this teaching revolutionary decided the best way to show her how to not use a gun was the kill himself. Best lesson plan of all time! You can only use it the one time though. The Jefferson County Sheriff’s Office says a firearm safety demonstration turned deadly Friday when a 40-year-old Imperial man accidentally shot and killed himself. [Read More]

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Thats What You Get For Having Arkansas Spell Stuff For You

Posted on September 10, 2009 | The Editor

Notice anything particularly stupid about our shiny new ambulances? If you didn’t, you must be from Arkansas, which is the same place they got these from. From Deb Peterson’s blog post: Bill Greenblatt, photographer about town, was on hand when some new ambulances that had been lettered in Arkansas were delivered to the St. Louis Fire Department headquarters downtown. So now they have to get them fixed. Eh, they’ll just take some money from the education budget. [Read More]

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Sedalia, Missouri’s School District is Run By Spineless Morons

Posted on August 31, 2009 | The Editor

If you graduated from Sedalia, Missouri’s school district, you are probably a moron. I’m just playing the odds here. Why? Well because apparently this wacky thing called science and specifically evolution isn’t cool enough to even be mentioned on a freaking t-shirt, let alone taught! T-shirts promoting the Smith-Cotton High School band’s fall program have been recalled because of concerns about the shirt’s evolution theme. The light gray shirts feature an image of a monkey progressing through various stages of evolution until eventually becoming a human. [Read More]

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How To Endear Yourself to Coworkers: Fake Cancer

Posted on August 24, 2009 | The Editor

A courthouse clerk in Pineville, MO was fired after lying to co-workers by saying she had cancer and then receiving roughly $10,000 in gifts. Officials say 42-year-old Tammy Young told people she had been diagnosed with Ewing’s sarcoma, a malignant form of tumor, and had been undergoing treatment at three different hospitals. But co-workers in the county prosecutor’s office became suspicious and her story began to unravel, leading to her firing in July. [Read More]

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KSDK.com is the Internet Version of Those Clipboard Ladies in the Mall

Posted on August 14, 2009 | The Editor

Hey KSDK.com, this has got to stop. If you can’t read that writing about this demographic survey that pops up while using their cluttered site, it reads: To help us keep ksdk.com available to all users free of charge, please answer the following questions. You should not be asked these questions again during future visits using the same computer. Register now to post, publish and participate and save keystrokes later. [Read More]

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Stay Classy St. Louis: Health Care Fighting

Posted on August 12, 2009 | The Editor

St. Louis Health Care fights on YouTube:

Here’s an idea. Everyone needs to shut the hell up and lets have a conversation like adults.

Morons on both sides are yelling at kids, telling them to “get a job” (college is a job), taking swings at old ladies and constantly talking over each other like five year-olds. God you people suck.

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No Shoes, No Service…Babies Included!

Posted on August 7, 2009 | The Editor

A Sunset Hills Burger King manager threw a mother and her six month old baby out of the restaurant because the baby didn’t have shoes on. From Mahalo’s page on the subject: Jennifer Frederich brought her baby daughter into the restaurant barefoot and ordered food. The manager told her, “you can order ‘to go’ but you’re going to have to leave if she doesn’t have shoes on, it’s against health code. [Read More]

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