Kid Drives Over A Lady Because Jimmy John’s Screwed Up His Order

Look at 19 year-old Willliam Hampel up there. Seems like a nice lad doesn’t he? Up there smiling with his not-quite Justin Bieber-esque hair cut. Well guess what? Under all that hair, half-smiles and ance breaths the soul of a guy that will not stand for any other sandwich other than the one he ordered! Police say 19-year-old William Hampel placed an order at the Jimmy John’s store in the 1200 block of Strassner drive on July 2nd. [Read More]

Kansas City Man Runs Naked in to House, and in to Child’s Room

Everyone has that crazy cousin right? Well not like these Kansas City folks who probably won’t be inviting their Kentucky cousin back to Kansas City for the holidays after he did some wild stuff. Now sure, this kinda thing might sound pretty reasonable for people in Kentucky, but ’round these parts (yes, even Kansas City), it’s pretty “weird” alright. By “weird’ we mean “molester-ish”. Oh, and by “molester-ish” we mean “seriously 100% messed up and totally molester-y”…seriously. [Read More]

Take That First Baptist Church of St. Peters!

You really can’t fault a man for executing a perfect plan. Drive up to a church, nearly hitting the building, hop out and run screaming in to the building knocking old people out of the way until the police arrive. Apart from forgetting to lick Jesus’ nipples on the crucifix statue, this plan went off without a hitch! Officer Melissa Doss, a spokeswoman for St. Peters police, said the man arrested also pushed another person while inside the church, laid hands on a third person and verbally assaulted another. [Read More]

Dear Punching Kitty: You’re Going to Hell

Subtitle: Dear guy: We know. It’s cool. Sometimes people don’t like this site. It happens, and is expected. Whether it’s because we’ve made fun of them or they just don’t like our humor, its going to happen and that’s totally cool with us. No one is expected to like everything. For example, we don’t like Christian Rock. It’s horrible. That’s no sleight on anyone’s belief system mind you, just a preference, a preferences that drives us to not listen to Christian rock…it does not however make us want to write odd notes to the people that make Christian Rock. [Read More]

This is the Best Crazy Bitch Fight We’ve Seen in a While

Lets be clear. We don’t want to mislead anyone. This is the best “chick” fight we’ve seen in a while. “Chick” fights consists of 2+ attractive girls that probably really aren’t fighting as much as they are just wrestling to get people’s attention. They do this because it works. Chick Fights are awesome. This video below (use headphones) is a “crazy bitch” fight. One of the combatants is tall and lanky, the other is short and fat with pink hair that gets ripped off and both are really really pissed off. [Read More]

St. Louis is the 21st Craziest City

Everyone thinks their home town is the craziest. “Oh man. Crazy times back then. You think this place is crazy?! Dude. Nothing like my town.” Wouldn’t it be fun if someone ruined all those arguments by making up random data points and then ranking the cities accordingly? The Daily Beast did just that. We didn’t win. St. Louis came in at #21 with 20 psychiatrists per capita, a stress score* of 23, a 34 on eccentricity*, a drinking rating* of 22 and the following comment: [Read More]

Hoes Be Trippin in the Loop Yesterday

Not sure if the sorta-thaw we had yesterday loosed up the frozen crazy, but in some crazy crap was going down in the Loop around lunch time. First at the corner of Leland and Delmar we saw a 70+ year old woman land a punch on a van as it sped through the intersection. I mean a punch too, nothing accidental. A freaking punch. Not more than an hour later, we saw a woman beat the living hell out of a “gentleman” over a video game. [Read More]

Moron Freaks Out at a Kansas City McDonalds

Alesha McMullen has been charged with Class D felony property damage after freaking out in a Kansas City McDonalds after she was displeased with the service and food she had received. McMullen threw numerous objects over the counter at employees, knocked over both registers and completely disregarded those “Wet Floor” signs. All the damage came to about $3,000 in total. Oh, and because I love you…there’s video! No word yet as to why a related video to this on YouTube concerns Fresh Prince star Alfonso Ribeiro. [Read More]

More “Who Cares?” News From KSDK’s Leisa Zigman: Wedding Day Flub

Of course you want your wedding day to be perfect, but guess what? Not gonna happen. Everyone has something weird or crappy happen. Admittedly, some are worse off than others, but its always something. For instance our first whirlwind marriage with super model Heidi Klum (Don’t ask her about. She’ll pretend like she won’t know what you are talking about.) was totally ruined when I was arrested outside her, I mean our, bathroom window for just standing there with a locket of my future wife’s hair and all those photos of us…well they are just of her, but someone has to take the photo, with the telephoto lens, from my van. [Read More]

Update: McDonald’s is Not to be Messed With

Last Thursday we ran a story (with accompanying video) about a guy that refused to pull forward at the drive through and wait for his grub and thus demanded a refund. Things didn’t go well after that: After waiting ten minutes I knocked on the drive-thru window and asked for the food or money back. No response. I pulled out of drive-thru, parked my car and entered McDonalds. I patiently waited at the front counter. [Read More]