Jailed Miami Booster Navin Shapiro Ruins Everything

You might have heard that ESPN interrupted its continual coverage of how the Yankees and Red Sox are doing, to bring you an important message about Navin Shapiro and how his blabbing led to another university being caught being all about the money instead of whatever it is universities used to do before college sports made money. The school in question is the University of Miami, but the local connection is how this story has tainted the “I don’t win games, but I’m honest” image of the new Mizzou basketball coach, Frank Haith. [Read More]

Mizzou Quarterback Blaine Gabbert Leaves for NFL

Oh Mizzou fans, wasn’t it much easier when you had a starting quarterback that was a little short guy that was good but not good enough that any NFL team would pick after 255 chances? You had to go out and recruit a tall kid with a strong arm and good mobility. Now he’s gone. “This is definitely a bittersweet day for me, I was really looking forward to having a chance to do some special things next season with my teammates, but in the end, this is the right decision to make for myself and my family,” said Gabbert. [Read More]

Mizzou Freshman Fell Out of His Dorm

Richard Mehan, a 19 year old Mizzou freshman from Chesterfield, is in the hospital after falling from his dorm’s balcony Saturday night. The St. Louis High School grad fell from a fifth-floor balcony to a fourth-floor Laws hall landing at 2 am and is in “fair” condition at a Columbia hospital. What could he have been doing at 2am Missouri University Police captain Brain Weimer? Weimer said Mehan had been drinking. [Read More]

Here’s the Actual Photo of Sam Bradford in a Mizzou Jersey

On Monday we mocked up what we thought it would look like when Sam Bradford pays off his bet with a Rams teammate about who would win Saturday’s game of Mizzou vs Oklahoma (above), but yesterday the real thing went down and we have photos of Oklahoma’s former QB rocking a personalized Mizzou jersey, courtesy of Rams wide receiver Danario Alexander.

It all started with an early morning tweet by Alexander saying simply “Good morning people!! I have a surprise for you today.”

A few hours later two more tweets followed with attached photos of Bradford rocking his personalized Mizzou jersey with his old college days number 14 on the front:

When reporters asked if Bradford ever thought about going to Mizzou out of high school, the media-savvy rookie quarterback replied:

Absolutely not, I wanted to win Big 12 championships.

…and what will he do with his personalized Mizzou jersey?

It’s going right back to Mr. Alexander. He can take it wherever he got it.

Full photos after the jump!

via AP

[Read More]

Mizzou Beats Oklahoma, Sam Bradford Loses Bet

The day before his current team was dealt an heartbreaking loss, Sam Bradford’s alma mater, Oklahoma, lost to Mizzou and in turn, Sam Bradford lost the bet he had in place with Rams wide receiver Danario Alexander. Quite a crappy weekend for Rams Quarterback Sam Bradford, but he seems to be enjoying himself all the same: Our Photoshopping (perfectly suitable for sending a photo link to your friends at Oklahoma) of a happy Sam Bradford rocking Mizzou gear is only a preview of reality, as the loser of the bet had to wear their collegate rival’s colors during practice the next week. [Read More]

Mizzou Running Back Derrick Washington Charged with Sexual Assault

It had to be something this heavy for Derrick Washington, the stand-out running back, to be mysteriously suspended by Mizzou head coach Gary Pinkel last week. Division I college football coaches generally don’t just “indefinitely suspend” one of their best players for the something like library fines, and sure enough, the rap on Washington is a way worse than library fines…unless you broke in to the library after dark and put your penis in the books without asking, then it would be about the same. [Read More]

Kareem Rush, Former Mizzou Basketball Player, Drops New Single

After bouncing around the NBA from the Lakers, to the Bobcats, the Sonics, Pacers, 76ers, the Clippers and even a stint in Lithuania, is it really a surprise to see former Mizzou basketball stand-out Kareem Rush anywhere? Ok then, what about a music video? It sure looks like the NBA career of Kareem Rush may be over with a nagging knee injury, but his vocal chords seems fine and he can wear a leather jacket on the beach like nobodies’ business in his new music video.

At least he’s not rapping.

With a single, “Hold You Down,” receiving airtime on 10 R&B stations across the country, including his hometown KPRS in Kansas City, Mo., as well as stations in Los Angeles and Washington, D.C., Rush is trying to do something countless other professional athletes have failed at — succeed in the music business.

The good news about Rush’s music career is that apparently your basketball success is inversely related to your musical talent. Observe the following list ordered in descending basketball skill along with a quote.

  1. Kobe Bryant  — “Kobe made an album. Kobe’s album sucked. It would’ve been better if he let me write it.” – 50 Cent

  2. Shaq — “Tell me how my a** tastes” — Shaq himself

  3. Allen Iverson — “Everybody stay fly, get money, kill and f*ck b*tches” — Jewels, Iverson’s rap alias, on the song “40 Bars”

  4. Chris Webber — “Sub-par in front of the mic, in recent years Webber has excelled as a producer.” — naismithlives.com

No doubt Kareem’s career is far below even Webber’s so, statistically, this bodes well for his music. We’ll see, but really, its not nearly as bad as we would have thought. You’ll know if he’s a legit R&B star if he makes his song titles have extra stuff in parenthesis, like “Crazy For You (If You Just Shut Up For a Second)” or “I Love You Baby (Touch My Penis)”

Click through the jump to see Kareem Rush’s video for Promises (Hold You Down) Yup, parenthesis. He’s legit.

via ESPN and our tipster

[Read More]

Danario Alexander’s Tweets are Like Poetry…Crazy Crazy Poetry

The Mizzou wide-reciever that had a career year in 2009 but was left undrafted last April has found another way to entertain us all that doesn’t involve touchdowns: Insane ramblings on his Twitter stream. This is way better than watching a Mizzou game. Here are a few examples: Hmm. Begging for line-sitters is something that NFL players can pull off maybe… See this is brilliant. Danario has found a way to make the label “Twitter Follower” more demeaning by incorporating the term “bitches” in there. [Read More]

Mizzou Racists Charged for Littering

Back on March 3rd, we talked about the unfunny, offensive but otherwise legal “prank” perpetrated on the Mizzou campus that involved cotton balls being spread in front of the Black Culture Center early one morning. Sure this is offensive, but its more offensive that someone thought this was going to play on some level. This is like telling industrial revolution jokes. “University of Missouri, Columbia Police tell Globe-Democrat.com that they are investigating but at this point have no arrests. [Read More]

Mizzou Forgets How Cell Phones Work

So say you are an important guy in some respects and because of that, you have a lot of phone numbers and text messages on your phone. Now say you get a new phone, which all of us seem to do about once a month these days. Wouldn’t you make sure to clear out your old phone before getting rid of it? Of course you would, because you aren’t from 1977, you know what a cell phone is, and you aren’t a moron…or at least a big enough one to think that someone might take a peak in your important by proxy phone! [Read More]