Albert Pujols Invalidates Your Death

 Posted on February 16, 2011  |  The Editor

In the screen grab included below of KSDK.com’s home page, you see that Albert Pujols has managed to triumph over death! Four mentions of the Pujols contract dominate the home page, while 3 other stories about crime and death sink to the bottom like the boring crap news they are. Oh you died today and you want people to recognize it or something? Should have thought about that before you up and died on “contract deadline day”! [Read More]
albert pujols  ksdk 

STLToday’s Best Photo and Caption Combo Ever?

 Posted on February 14, 2011  |  The Editor

There’s a screen grab from today’s STLToday.com/sports homepage on the right. Do they think that’s how Pujols reacted to the rumored offer with only 7 years as opposed to his required 10? They think he reacted to it like that time Skip Schumaker ripped that nasty fart in the dugout and then tried to look all casual in the other direction to throw Pujols off the trail? Maybe he did. [Read More]
cardinals  pujols  stltoday 

Seat Warmers Are Burning People and Maggie Crane Says Maggie Crane Likes to Talk in the Third Person

 Posted on February 10, 2011  |  The Editor

KMOV’s Maggie Crane brings us a story of Volkswagon seat warmers that are burning people’s asses, no doubt after becoming sentient and fighting back against all those times you farted on them while in traffic or right before you got out of the car to head in to the office. A Metro East woman says the seat warmer in her Volkswagen Jetta melted her leather car seat and burned her back. [Read More]
kmov  maggie crane 

Missouri State Government: The Internet is Scary After Your Facebook Gets Hacked!

 Posted on February 8, 2011  |  The Editor

OMG: Internet hackers are targeting Missouri state representatives and their staff, and no one knows exactly how or why. JK, LOL. Really STLToday? “internet hackers”? You have the first line of your story about Missouri State officials getting their Facebook passwords cracked is about “internet hackers” mysteriously “targeting” the state representatives? You even got the little laptop floating in the blue internet image there. Really nicely done. Did you ask our grandma for help on this story? [Read More]
any key  facebook  hackers  internet  social media  state government 

Maria Spagnuolo Will Haunt Your Dreams

 Posted on February 7, 2011  |  The Editor

Did you watch the Super Bowl on Fox? Then you’ve already seen what we’re going to talk about: Those “One on One with Maria Spanguolo” spots. Ahhhh! Damn Fox2, could have done any creepier lighting on the Rams head coache’s wife? All shadowy and has that effect where no matter what place you stand, she looks like she will put your child in a giant black pot with a boiling water and a few cut up carrots. [Read More]
fox2  mandy murphy  maria spagnuolo  superbowl 

Steven Jackson’s Wild Super Bowl Limo Ride

 Posted on February 7, 2011  |  The Editor

Like many NFL stars, St. Louis Rams running back Steven Jackson grabbed a flight down to Dallas to join in the Super Bowl fun. Early on Super Bowl Sunday, Jackson was scheduled to attend the ESPN tailgate party, so he took a limo from the hotel and the limo, in turn, took SJ39 on a little pre-party adventure. Luckily, he’s a prolific tweeter with a strong 3G connection, so we all got to ride shotgun on the crazy limo ride, which did, eventually, end with Jackson and company getting to the appearance safely. [Read More]
limo  social media  steven jackson  superbowl  twitter 

KPLR News: People Slip More When There’s Ice Than When There Isn’t Ice

 Posted on February 4, 2011  |  The Editor

It seems like forever ago with local news channel Fox2 (KTVI) swallowed channel 11 (KTVI)’s station and news department. We remember wondering: “If both stations are still going to do news, how will they break it up so they aren’t competing against themselves?” Apparently the deal was Fox2 will deal with actual news and 11 will take these two stick, try not to poke their eye out and see what they can come up with. [Read More]
ice  kplr  slippery  weather 

Local News Confirms Their Weather Delusion to Gail Pennington

 Posted on February 3, 2011  |  The Editor

A lot of you wrote in to us with the same sentiment: “Do we really need around the clock local news coverage about the ‘storm of the century’”? Apparently the general St. Louis audience, or at least our readers, thought that if they had to be stuck at home, then they could at least watch some TV. Ha! Nice try St. Louis, but local news won’t let that happen. Not on their watch. [Read More]
kmov  ksdk  ktvi  local news  weather 

D’Marco Farr Accused of “Being a Complete Dick”

 Posted on February 3, 2011  |  The Editor

Former Ram and current 101 ESPN host D’Marco Farr went to dinner last night while in Dallas for the SuperBowl and he had to pee really really really bad. He parked in a lot to run inside and…well…it turned out to be a valet lot, so that made the little valet guy angry. Cue TMZ’s cameras! This morning we heard that Bob Stelton stood up for Farr saying that he offered to pay, which honestly seems fair, but after watching the tape, maybe he could have offered to pay a little more nicely. [Read More]
101espn  d'marco farr  superbowl  tmz 

Mayor Slay is Here to Help

 Posted on February 1, 2011  |  The Editor

In case you forgot the way to get help via the phone that most of you grew up ingrained in your minds, Mayor Slay is here to help with a perfectly timed tweet reminding you all about 911 for all your Snowpocalypse related emergencies. Where the hell was this kind of helpful tidbit in November when the city seems to be in the midst of a race against 2009’s death toll? [Read More]
911  emergencies  mayor slay  social media  twitter