Kansas City Wins Google Contest For Free Crazy Fast Internet

 Posted on March 30, 2011  |  The Editor

Think you’re pretty awesome now don’t you Kansas City, luring Google’s promise of awesome internet service away from us. Well pat yourselves on the back now because once Google realizes all your internet traffic consists of is people watching YouTube videos of guys getting hit in the balls and posting “Maybe we can sign Pujols!” on Royals message boards, they’ll wish they would have came to the other side of the state first! [Read More]
google  internet  kansas city 

Take That First Baptist Church of St. Peters!

 Posted on March 30, 2011  |  The Editor

You really can’t fault a man for executing a perfect plan. Drive up to a church, nearly hitting the building, hop out and run screaming in to the building knocking old people out of the way until the police arrive. Apart from forgetting to lick Jesus’ nipples on the crucifix statue, this plan went off without a hitch! Officer Melissa Doss, a spokeswoman for St. Peters police, said the man arrested also pushed another person while inside the church, laid hands on a third person and verbally assaulted another. [Read More]
church  crazy  morons  st. peters 

There Was a Jumper on the Jefferson Barracks Bridge

 Posted on March 30, 2011  |  The Editor

Last night, a jumper was spotted on the Jefferson Barracks Bridge, which caused them to close the bridge down until the sad little guy could be talked down. As of this writing, that’s all the details we’ve heard. We’ll just assume it was Fox Sports Midwest sports writer B.J. Rains, sad because the only Cardinal that will do an interview with him was traded to Seattle, and you can’t just keep interviewing that guy anymore, because that would look really pathetic and sad…wait never mind. [Read More]
jumper 

The Old Rock House Website Is Hacked…Yes, Again.

 Posted on March 29, 2011  |  The Editor

It was just Friday when we told you about the new website for local concert venue The Old Rock House (www.oldrockhouse.com, but I’d avoid clicking on that if you’re still rocking Internet Explorer.) and how it was really creepy and we didn’t get the whole “duct-taped girl” motif they were going for…oh that’s right they were hacked! Later that night it was fixed though, the creepy taped girl was expunged and the Old Rock House’s website full of photos from concerts by people we’ve never heard of was restored. [Read More]
hacking  old rock house  sighting 

August Busch IV to Leave AB InBev’s Board

 Posted on March 28, 2011  |  The Editor

According to Bloomberg, August Busch IV, the former CEO of Anheuser-Busch and current media-dodging playboy of a recently deceased girlfriend, will join the ranks of the unemployed after he leaves his seat on the AB InBev board of directors after a April 26th shareholder vote to bring in two new members. The news is not surprising, but it’s gotta be tough to give up that sweet gig, but it’s not clear if this means he will also be losing his 100k+/month salary from AB Inbev as a special consultant, product taster and official “makes sure the couch doesn’t float away” guy, which was negotiated during the buyout. [Read More]
august busch IV  celebrity 

The Old Rock House’s New Website Has Already Been Hacked

 Posted on March 25, 2011  |  The Editor

Update: The site has now been restored! Take that Hacker Group Yemen! Original story follows… St. Louis concert venue The Old Rock House launched their new website today (www.oldrockhouse.com) with a certain amount of fanfare and…well…it’s an interesting take. Anyone else see the link to their concert schedule? Maybe it’s behind the creepy girl face with her mouth taped shut? Apparently the new site, within hours of launching, got hacked and hacked good especially since at the time of this writing it was still this way and phone calls to the venue returned an eta of “Um…I’m not sure…” followed by direction to go to their Facebook page that appeared to be wildly out of date. [Read More]
hacking  old rock house  sighting 

Drunken St. Louis Lipdub: Bohemian Rhapsody

 Posted on March 25, 2011  |  The Editor

For your Friday enjoyment, we present a YouTube find of a bunch of St. Louis kids lip syncing to Bohemian Rhapsody…really really poorly. See! We don’t always post about crime, sometimes we post videos of (hopefully) drunk kids rocking out who eventually get around to pretending a bat is a large stroke-able penis, and finally finding a chance to rock that weed hat they’ve had lying around this whole time. [Read More]
lipdup  weird 

That’s Probably Not Fog Around the Weather Man’s House

 Posted on March 23, 2011  |  The Editor

This is going to be a shocker to a lot of you, but despite our chiseled good looks, amazing arms and a “turn and look, with hair flip” move so perfect it acts like a magnifying glass that focuses our hot rays of sexy in to a beam that instantly ignites the panties of whatever super-model we’ve decided to split open with our ” little lightsaber” to keep warm in that day, we didn’t always run with the “in crowd” back in high school. [Read More]
anthony slaughter  ksdk  sighting  twitter 

Archbishop: Long Dead Priest Probably Touched Kids

 Posted on March 22, 2011  |  The Editor

Reverend John Wieberg became a priest in 1918, retired in 1961 and died two years later. In the meantime, he served as a priest in southern Missouri as well as St. Charles County, and, according to St. Louis Archbishop Robert Carlson, he touched kids. Rebuttal Father Wieberg? …oh, that’s right, you’re dead. Five people have come forward over the past few years alleging abuse that happened from the mid-1940s through the early 1960s, Phil Hengen, director of the archdiocesan office of Child and Youth Protection, said Monday. [Read More]
arthbishop  catholic church  molester  social issues 

Kirkwood Middle School Doesn’t Like Hell…or Jesus…Maybe Both

 Posted on March 18, 2011  |  The Editor

“Jesus, he scares the hell out of you” That’s what was on some Kirkwood Middle Schooler’s shirt the other day, and we can sit down some time over General Mills flavored coffee to discuss the reverse cleverness of that shirt and how it’s, frankly, a rare shot of honesty to claim that Jesus is scaring you in to doing good things, but that is for another day. Today we’re talking about how Kirkwood Middle School wouldn’t let Michelle Ramirez wear that shirt to class. [Read More]
hell  jesus  kirkwood  middle school  morons