PUNCHING KITTY: 2009 - 2013

Punching Kitty was a writing project for the city of St. Louis to have a little fun and try to get everyone to stop taking themselves so seriously…and hopefully highlight some critical issues along the way. Not everyone liked it (it turns out people don’t love being made fun of) but we converted a lot of people and I take pride that the site was truly well read. From the local media, to area police departments, Punching Kitty truly became a source for news and entertainment for St. Louis.

We had a lot of fun, but all good things need an ending and ours was on March 13th, 2013. When we closed up shop the news made local radio, TV, and even the front page of STLToday (The St. Louis Post Dispatch’s website) where we were the top story over a new pope being named. Wild stuff.

While we will no longer actively write, the site will stay up as an archive for St. Louis.

- The Editor

Collinsville School Bus Drops Off Kid At Wrong Stop, Leaves Him Wandering the Streets

 Posted on August 14, 2012  |  The Editor

A 5-year-old Collinsville boy was wandering around next to busy streets after being dropped off at the wrong stop by his bus driver after he was never supposed to be on the bus after school in the first place. It’s probably the kid’s fault though. He washed off his “no bus” hand stamp and replaced it with “Side of the road with no adults around even though I’m 5.” Kid’s got some huge hands. [Read More]
bus  Collinsville  illinois  school 

St. Louis City Prosecutor Loves the Spice Girls

 Posted on August 13, 2012  |  The Editor

The hard-nosed city prosecutor who usually uses Twitter to shine a light on the various crimes that pass through her office, but last night during the Olympics closing ceremonies she took to Twitter for a very different reason…don’t worry, she’s OK with us telling everyone.

Way to spice up your Twitter profile! We hope St. Louis’ criminal element is ready for Lawyer Spice!

via @JenniferJoyceCA

jennifer joyce  spice girls  twitter 

Six Flags Busts Peeping Tom on Water Park Staff

 Posted on August 13, 2012  |  The Editor

Ever get that feeling you’re being watched…while you change your clothes in a public place with drains in the floor and only a shower curtain and wobbly door between you, the Monsoon Marge gift shop and thousands of fat people pretending to be on a concrete beach in the middle of Missouri? Well, you probably are. In the future we’d suggest completely avoiding any naked time at any point of your trip to Six Flags. [Read More]
eureka  peeping tom  six flags 

St. Louis Area Police Brace For More Violence, Practice Shooting Stoic Figures

 Posted on August 10, 2012  |  The Editor

Update: Changed the title, because obviously you can’t shoot someone with a knife…what we we’re were trying to say that they are shooting people holding kn…doesn’t matter. New title! This year, despite cheery tweets from @MayorSlay to the contrary, violence is as high as it’s ever been, but particularly noteworthy is the amount of violence we’ve seen towards police officers. Time and time again we’ve seen comments from the STLPD and their peers that the average criminal doesn’t seem to give a damn anymore about turning on the police. [Read More]
police  stlpd  training  violence 

St. Charles Police Catch a Predator Dateline Style!

 Posted on August 9, 2012  |  The Editor

We’re not sure who got to play the Chris Hansen part, but we do know the sting worked as 23 year-old Mohammad Teimoortagh of St. Charles is in custody on Attempted Sexual Trafficking of a Child, Attempted Statutory Rape and several other horrible charges. Though as you can tell by the mugshot, he’s not worried. “Hey yo! Solissatatin’ a minor?! Fagetta ’bout it! It’s one of those tings ya know? I’m horny, yadda yadda yadda, I might have tried to proposition a 14 year old. [Read More]
pervert  st charles 

Trouble At SLU: Law School Dean Leaves With Middle Fingers in the Air

 Posted on August 9, 2012  |  The Editor

There’s trouble in midtown these days as in-fighting between the St. Louis University president, Fr. Lawrence Biondi, and the now former dean of the SLU Law School, Annette Clark, became very public yesterday. Credit to NextSTL for digging up the dirt and posting all the letters online. Great scoop! Here’s how this is going to work. We usually don’t cover stuff as fancy as Dean vs Catholic University President fights, but it’s newsworthy all the same, so what we’re going to do is run her resignation letter through the ole Punching Kitty Translatamatron 232273247290300. [Read More]
slu  st. louis university 

Missed Connections: You Saw Me Get Tazed

 Posted on August 8, 2012  |  The Editor

Sometimes you see a girl and there’s metaphorical sparks, other times there’s actual sparks. You saw me get tazed. – m4w – 27 (Galleria ) Hey baby, I’m sorry you had to see that, but you know I’m innocent girl. They ain’t put the receipt in the bag. Anyway, you were a stunning goddess, with more curves than a NASCAR track, and you seen it all go down. Drop a line for me, and I’ll show you that the whole ordeal left me electric. [Read More]
craigslist  missed connections 

God Voted For Todd Akin, Claims Todd Akin

 Posted on August 8, 2012  |  The Editor

Last night Todd Akin cruised to victory over John Brunner, and Sarah Steelman with a 6% lead (as of this writing) to grab the Republican nomination for Senate in November’s general election. Lots of people voted for Akin to give him the victory, but there’s one guy who’s vote mattered the most: God. God’s official Missouri residency seems to be a little hard to pin down, but it doesn’t matter to Akin who gave the first thanks to him in his victory speech… [Read More]
election  primary  todd akin 

The Public is a Little Less Safe Tonight Because the Director of Public Safety Got Burglarized

 Posted on August 7, 2012  |  The Editor

The car of Jerry Lee, the Director of the Missouri Department of Public Safety, was robbed burglarized Sunday morning in Forest Park, netting the thieve one gun, two Department of Public Safety badges and a GPS unit. It’s the GPS unit that really scares us. Everyone in St. Louis has a gun, but this guy’s got a gun and a map. He’ll find whoever he wants to find. Lee, 64, was parked at the Art Museum between 9:45 and 10:45 a. [Read More]
art museum  director of public safety  theft 

Kid Drives Over A Lady Because Jimmy John’s Screwed Up His Order

 Posted on August 6, 2012  |  The Editor

Look at 19 year-old Willliam Hampel up there. Seems like a nice lad doesn’t he? Up there smiling with his not-quite Justin Bieber-esque hair cut. Well guess what? Under all that hair, half-smiles and ance breaths the soul of a guy that will not stand for any other sandwich other than the one he ordered! Police say 19-year-old William Hampel placed an order at the Jimmy John’s store in the 1200 block of Strassner drive on July 2nd. [Read More]
brentwood  crazy  jimmy john's