Ever try to call a cab in St. Louis? It’s a bitch. If you’re in a popular area you can grab one, but trying to get one to pick you up at a random area is nearly impossible at times, and even if they do get there, it’s usually late enough that you and you’re party are either thinking about doing something else or one guy steps up and says “Screw it, I’ll be the designated driver!”. In short, St. Louis isn’t the easiest place to get a cab…but that’s not stopping the St. Louis Cab drivers from bitching about the nerve of a random convention in town to acquire other means of transportation by paying someone that’s not them.

Count us as extremely surprised when we heard the news that East St. Louis’ Police Chief, Ranadore Foggs, called it quits Saturday. Who the hell would have guessed that East St. Louis had a Police Chief?!

Chief Foggs told Mayor Alvin Parks Jr. about his decision Saturday.

Foggs said he had philosophical differences with the mayor on how the police department should be run. Foggs said his character and integrity were important to him and making the city safe was his No. 1 goal, and that’s why he came aboard the police department.

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The President spun through our little metropolis yesterday and, as usual we’re sure, had quite a busy day.

He started off by touching down at Lambert Airport at 5:35pm and was greeted by Governor Jay Nixon and Mayor Francis Slay, who both blew him until climax welcomed him to our fine city. “What the f*ck?! You still haven’t fixed this shit? Didn’t we give you money for this? Jesus.” we’re assuming the President said after leaving the airport on his way to…

In honor of the 10th anniversary of 9/11, Missouri Governor Jay Nixon proclaimed that you should let all people in uniform cut in front of you in line…but just like for one week. After that you and you alone will be first in line for the new issue of Jugs.

Nixon has proclaimed this week as “Put the Uniform First Week” in Missouri. He says it’s intended to show respect to people who wear uniforms as police officers, firefighters, emergency responders and military personnel.

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“Oh officer, thank god you’re here! I’ve been shot three times in the leg and the guy left about 30 minutes ago in my car but my daughter is still in the car so at least I didn’t have to deal with her while I was bleeding all over the sidew…oh now don’t you look nice!”

The St. Louis Police department is dropping some change on a new set of “formal” uniforms for each officer. How much? Just 80,000. “Hey everyone! Let me know what you want me to buy before the state makes the mayor our boss again!”

The United States government is having a rough go of it lately and someone needed to do something! Someone needed to step up, be a leader and fill that emptiness we all seem to be carrying around these days! Who’s it going to be? Show us a sign!

At about 11:30 AM on Tuesday, a plane flew by the S&P offices in New York dragging a banner behind it saying: “THANKS FOR THE DOWNGRADE. YOU SHOULD ALL BE FIRED.”

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If you told me that you have $1.5 Million to spend and really love open spaces that used to be filled with long-since empty stores and cart after cart of hair extension and bedazzled cell phone cases, then do we have the place for you!

Northwest Plaza Mall and 500 Office Tower is a one- and two-story super regional mall with a 12-story office building that has 1,829,261 square feet of gross leasable area in St. Ann, a suburb in St. Louis. The mall is currently 8.54% occupied and the office portion is 47.29% occupied. Overall occupancy is 11.87%. The center was formerly anchored by Macy’s, Sears, Dillard’s, and Steve and Barry’s, though all anchors have vacated as of the date of appraisal. Additional outparcel stores include a vacant Toys R Us and vacant The Bedroom Store.

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The Congressman for Missouri’s 7th District, Billy Long, took to twitter earlier today to finally make the connection we’ve all been searching for: How is the government’s looming debt crisis like Amy Winehouse’s recent demise?

Nailed it. Way to related to the young people, old fat guy in a cowboy hat that makes odd references to a celebrity death on the currently popular social network!

Congressman Boss Hog here thought he was mighty clever after he thought this one up! You get it right? Both Winehouse and the government are “addicted” to stuff, and reaching August 2nd without a new debt ceiling deal in place will be like America passed out and died on the floor of our London flat…wait, what?

Over the last weekend a piece ran in the Post Dispatch about a guy that had his laptop stolen. With the help of exactly no one, he managed to locate the thief by logging in to his computer and trick him in to typing in his name and address. The victim gave all the information to the police who did…nothing.

Four days after the June 20 burglary of his Pennsylvania Avenue home, Van Almsick grew tired of waiting.

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An old lady in St. Charles was shocked to see her water bill in April was for $2,043.78, and we’re all talking about this because nothing all that interesting is going on.

Kelly, who is 80 and lives alone in her home in the 2000 block of Graystone Drive, has been disputing the accuracy of the 351,000 gallons of metered water consumption the city billed her for.

Kelly sent a letter disputing the bill to the city’s public works director, Debra Aylsworth, in May and met with public works officials on June 14. Following that meeting, Kelly received a letter from John Zimmerman, assistant director of public works. In the letter, Zimmerman concludes that Kelly’s Neptune AMR meter was not malfunctioning and that the city could not offer an adjustment on her bill based on meter error.

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