They Blew Up the Blanchette Bridge

The horrible countdown aside, this is some pretty solid video of the demolition of the Blanchette Bridge: The bridge was a mess, far too narrow and it clearly needed to go. However it’s still sad to think of all the people from O’Fallon, Lake St. Louis and Wentzville having to start their life over in Chesterfield after driving over the bridge to visit the mall, unaware they will never be able to return to their home that they tell people is “in the St. [Read More]

Highlights From the St. Charles County Incident Report

Sometimes it feels like all we do is cover stories about crime in the city and in the Metro East…which is probably because we do, and probably because there’s lots of it. Like “Aretha Franklin boob skin” a lot. While we love being arbitrarily unfair at times, we do like being fair most of the time and so it’s far past time for us to flip through the St. Charles County “Incident Report” that the Post Dispatch puts together for probably the very same reason. [Read More]

Tough Angry Biker Guy: 0; Old Man With Semi-Automatic Weapon: 1

At least two people have been killed in East St. Louis shootings over the long weekend that started with a “Stop the Violence” rally, but if you think that’s news then we should also tell you about the Cubs being horrible and how Taco Bell makes us poop. What is a little more news like is that a man was shot today on an overpass after what appears to be a “road rage” incident…and it happened deep in St. [Read More]

This Week in Duh: St. Charles County is Healthy, and St. Louis City is Not

Once again some organization told everyone stuff we already knew: St. Charles County is super healthy and St. Louis City is horribly unhealthy. Could it have something to do with the amount of violent crime and percentage of people with quality health care? Nah! It’s about parks and having a place to ride 10 speed bikes with black shorts and yellow skin tight tops that show your man boobs. For the third year in a row, St. [Read More]

Two St. Charles Kids Were Raised in Stinky House Filled With Lizards Snakes and Rats

Family Services dropped the hammer on a St. Charles family who were found to have 1 dog, 157 snakes and lizards, roughly 2,000 mice and rats, and 2 children living in their home. Clearly that ratio is all off. You’d have to at least have 500 kids in there before that was an appropriate amount of lizards and rats. The home, in the first block of Oak Bend Lane, off Laura Hill Road, was in “extremely filthy condition,” according to court documents, and one deputy who went inside was so overcome by the stench he ran outside to throw up. [Read More]

County Problems: Not So Automatic, Automatic Doors

_[Editor’s Note: For context, this was part of our impromptu “Animated GIF Week“]_ Sure there’s some bigotry out there, like how they hate the gay marriages, and how everyone who’s skin is equal to or darker than the cast Jersey Shores gets a constant stink eye, but if you’re white and straight, life is nearly flawless if you’re living out in the County. We did say nearly though. There’s always a fly in that ointment of glory, like when you have to park in the driveway and walk all the way up the slight incline to get in the house. [Read More]

Guy Claims He Was Car Jacked on Highway K, Police Immediately Call Him a Liar

An O’Fallon man is facing charges that include filing a false police report and leaving the scene of an accident, all because he’s a big pussy who’s afraid of his wife. The accident happened Tuesday night near the intersection of Weldon Spring and Highway K, just outside the O’Fallon, Missouri city limits. St. Charles County Sheriff’s Deputies said the man wrecked his car and then reported that he had been carjacked. [Read More]

Wentzville Church Trivia Night Ends With Accidental Shooting

A man was shot in Wentzville’s St. Patrick’s church over the weekend and the police are ruling it as an accident, which is just so St. Charles County. Sure people get shot out there too, just like in the city, but out there it’s always “My bad! Junior’s still a learnin’ about the safety! He’ll master it by age 5 like his daddy!” rather than a 45 year old prostitute gunning down some crackhead trying to steal her stash. [Read More]

It Took 11 Days to For Someone to Notice a Dead Body at the Ameristar Parking Garage

When you come to St. Charles to gamble at the Ameristar, you better be focused. This is the big time. Vegas?! Whatever. You come to the Ameristar for one thing: to play…and listen to 80’s cover bands in one of their theme bars, so ok, two things. Regardless, you need to be locked the hell in the minute you park your car. Not just focused mind you, but “don’t notice that obviously dead lady in her car” locked in. [Read More]

St. Charles County Home to World’s Best Mom

Kelli Horton (right) is the coolest mom ever! First, she took her kids for a car ride, then to McDonald’s for lunch, and then she let them play in the play area for as long as they wanted! Dude, that must have been the best day ever! Mom, can we get ice cream too? Mom…? A St. Charles County woman was arrested at a McDonald’s on Highway 94 Tuesday after leaving her children in a play area while she took heroin in the bathroom, police say. [Read More]