The Morning After the Cardinals Crushed the Nationals in Game 5

Since there’s no way we were sleeping last night, we scoured the web for stuff to read about the latest Cardinals dramatic comeback. Nothing was better than the Twitter stream of one Washington Nationals writer (@washingnats) who went (bottom to top) from crazy confident to “Thats messed up.” in the span of a few tweets. Here’s our mediocre attempt at Photoshoping his Twitter stream in a fun Facebook-sharable image: Here’s the column rundown on the Cardinals win (and Nationals crushing defeat): [Read More]

The Cardinals Just Accomplished the Largest Comeback in a Postseason Elimination Game Ever

Holy crap. What?! Um…how do we describe what just happend? Ok, here’s our best shot… DJDHADKFDS!!!!KDSFASDFDS!!!??SDKFASDF;ADSMCMAEJEHEIE.S,AALALDLDLD!!!!!!!!! Not bad. Here’s a better description from ESPN: Erasing an early six-run hole in Game 5 slowly but surely, the defending World Series champion Cardinals got a tying two-out, two-run single from Daniel Descalso and a go-ahead two-run single from Pete Kozma in the ninth inning and came all the way back to beat the Washington Nationals 9-7 on Friday night and win their NL Division Series. [Read More]

Congrats Cardinals For Being “Wildcard” Champs (or whatever)

First off, well done Cardinals on making it past the Wild Card game and in to the NLDS! This new Wild Card game sure is fun! We hear it’s super popular in Atlanta right now. (Kidding. Even with the Cardinals winning, this game is stupid.) For some reason we think it’s important to leave this link here to the definition of the infield fly rule. It’s really not that hard to understand. [Read More]

World Series Game 5: WTF Tony?!

The Cardinals lost game 5 (photo from the 8th inning above) in one of the worst performances we’ve seen all year for both the players and manager, which says a lot because this team sucked donkey schlong for a few months there. The team went, and this is just based on our score card so we might be a little off, 1 for 19,832,343 in scoring opportunities, but most baseball folks agree that more than anything, Tony stunk up the joint last night with one of his worst game management of all time. [Read More]

NLCS: Game 5

We didn’t do one of these yesterday, and we lost. Our bad. We’re back at it tonight though. Doin’ it for Torty (the original Cardinal post-season animal).

1st inning: Quick inning for both sides. Ryan Braun got a hit again, but that’s not news.

Top 2nd: Garcia looks good so far, but it’s all about when he gives up a hit or two. Here’s something else: TBS sucks.

7:26p: John Smoltz won’t ever stop talking.

7:28p: How hard is it to keep the game feed working UVerse? It feels like there hasn’t been a post season game that our UVerse HD feed hasn’t crapped out at some point. Oh and the jumpy Carlos Gomez got thrown out on the bases.

Mid 2nd: Ok, we’re just going to say it, the commercial with the little girl is surprising. We had no idea any black people liked country music…other than Hootie (- the Blowfish).

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NLCS: Game 3

Go Cardinals! The spirit of 1982 is in you! …whatever the hell that stupid falsetto crap means. Nothing like a gayer version of Richard Simmons to sing and sweat you in to playoff success. Trying something new tonight: The Facebook live stream. We have no idea if this is better, but WordPress sucks donkey balls for updating the site like we have in the past few live-blogging of games so we’re trying this out. [Read More]

Cardinals: NLDS Game 5

Big game tonight! Here’s a live stream of tweets from some notably funny or knowledgable Cardinal-watching people:

@MattSebekJoe Sports Fan writer and maker of Cardinal memes.

@athooksCards writer

@tortycraig – Allen Craig’s turtle.

@matthewhleach – Cardinals beat writer for

@dgoold – Post Dispatch sports writer. Not the bitchy one that just complains and says “I told you so!” all the time…the other one.

@mikeflynn_ – Punching editor and Cardinal fan that tries really really hard to keep the sports content to a minimum on the site.

@miklasz – Post Dispatch sports columnist. All around nice guy.

Click through the jump to see the full post with Twitter stream and extra in-game updates!

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Holy Balls! The Cardinals are in the Playoffs!

Some how, some way, the Cardinals managed to come back from a 8.5 game lead on September 1st to make it to the playoffs while also letting us enjoy watching the Braves choke away the second largest lead ever in this history of baseball! (Also we hear the Red Sox and Rays had a similar situation. Turn on ESPN to hear all about that.) So what does the little dirty joke blog do with a news story like this? [Read More]

Quick, Everyone Get Back on the Cardinals Bandwagon

Two weeks ago the Cardinals bandwagon was a pretty empty place. Tony LaRussa was on there, and the whole Fox Sports Midwest staff are contractually obligated to stay on there and make cheery promos to be run immediately after any blow-out loss by the Cardinals, but other than that there wasn’t much going on. Pujols even asked if he could use the extra bandwagon space in the off-season because he might have some moving that needs to be done. [Read More]