PUNCHING KITTY: 2009 - 2013

Editor’s Note: Make sure you play this video in the background while you read this.

Punching Kitty was a writing project for the city of St. Louis to have a little fun and try to get everyone to stop taking themselves so seriously…and hopefully highlight some critical issues along the way.

We had a lot of fun, but all good things need an ending and ours was on March 13th, 2013. While we will no longer actively write, the site will stay up as an archive. To the right are some of our favorite and most acclaimed articles from our four year run. You may also enjoy “This Day in PK History” which shows the posts written on this date in years past, and this page which shows a random article from the archives.

- The Editor

The Castlewood Treatment Center Sounds Scary and Awesome

Four lawsuits have now been filed against South County’s Castlewood Treatment Center concerning memory implants which is not something we believed to be possible, but now we’re pretty stoked as we’ve always wanted to be a secret agent on Mars! The allegations made by the former patients include having fake memories that convinced them that they were victims of satanic ritual abuse, that they witnessed murder, and even memories that they had eaten children. [Read More]

Oh Man the New New Northwest Plaza is Going to be Awesome! (JK, LOL!)

The stinky lump of empty sadness and RAZR cellphone case carts known as Northwest Plaza is set to be torn down Tuesday, and in it’s place will rise the next chapter in Northwest Plaza lore. It’s return to greatness! …which means what exactly? Oooh! Maybe it’s finally getting a Ms. Fields! A home improvement store, restaurants, outdoor shopping, an education center and an officer tower are all expected to be added. [Read More]

Sorry, Here’s the Booty Pillow

We know, we know. It’s been a rough couple of weeks of posting on here. There’s been two reasons for that: We’ve been busy. The only things going on were horrible election stories. Both of those situations should be past us, so this week should be better. In other news, “The Booty Pillow” is a real thing: No we will not “use it at the office to ease back pain”! [Read More]

The Many Model Faces of Karlie Kloss

St. Louis-area native, possible Sam Bradford girlfriend, and budding super model Karlie Kloss walked the runway in the Victorias Secret fashion show last night…as a sexy native america indian. Ok, yeah…sure…why not?! They don’t all have to look all mopey and square-jawed like this, while not as helpful against the cold conditions while living in an animal hide supported by sticks, there’s no reason some indians can’t look all small-boobed and sexy and with overly large headdresses like this. [Read More]

Go Vote

You should go vote right now…unless you’re going to vote for the opposite of what we voted for. If that’s what you’re planning to do, then don’t…or wait, do vote, but did you hear about the change in voting where you have to write down who/what you want to vote for on…um…that napkin on your right…it’s on the floor…there it is. OK, write your stuff on there and then fold it up and turn it in to the nearest Arby’s. [Read More]
voting 

Some Guy in South County Built a Castle

With construction nearly complete, the neighbors of the 2300 block of Telegraph Road now have a castle in their midst. South County finally has it’s “Methingham Palace”. Kinda weird, but solid idea going with the grey exterior. Going with white would have been a nightmare with all the drunks trying to find your drive-through window at all hours of the night. It’s still under construction and construction workers on site confirmed the name of the owner, but wouldn’t say anything about why he’s building a castle. [Read More]

St. Louis Halloween Costume Ideas, 2012 Edition

It snuck up on us this year, but here we are, Halloween. Do you have a costume? No?! Well don’t worry. We got your back, like we have the past few years (2011, 2010, 2009): 1. The Cardinals Show up to the party and be pretty great for a few hours and then just fall on your face. Get up and go back to being good until right at the end of the night where you’ll need to start coughing and continually choking until someone comes up and asks you to leave. [Read More]

The Fort Zumwalt East Junior Varsity Football Team Needs to Take a Moment and Think About What They Did

Sorry for disappearing for a couple of days, but don’t go off and be a stripper just yet, daddy’s back. Give us a hug! (Hug your monitor. Don’t leave us hanging.) High school is a weird place where the acne-addled hive-mind will occasionally decide something is cool despite that fact that no, it is not…actually it’s way past not cool, like 5 exits past not cool, and it’s getting a fountain soda at the gas station off of WTF Road. [Read More]

Tiny Fey Blasts Todd Akin

“If I have to listen to one more grey-faced man with a $2 haircut explain to me what rape is,” she warned, “I’m going to lose my mind!” That was Saturday Night Live alum, current 30 Rock star, and not-so-secret-crush ours Tina Fey speaking Wednesday to the attendees of the Center for Reproductive Rights Inaugural Gala in New York. Fey did specifically mention everyone’s favorite creepy retarded uncle and wanna be Missouri Senator Todd Akin… [Read More]

Horrible Face-Shooting Thieving D*ckhead Brought to Justice

Vincent Newman has been apprehended and charged with at least one of the recent string of violent robberies in South City, and more charges are expected. Just listen to what this dickhead did: A 27-year-old woman was shot at 5:55 a.m. Wednesday as she walked to her car in the 1600 block of South Spring Avenue. The man took her purse and shot her in the face, police said. [Read More]