PUNCHING KITTY

A house blew up in Florissant but it look like the blast might have been part of a suicide attempt rather that the usual St. Louis area meth-house explosion.

“It blew it off the foundation,” said Deputy Fire Chief Scott Seppelt of the Florissant Valley Fire Protection District.

It appeared that the blast knocked out a window on a silver Kia Soul that was parked on the street near the house. [A neighbor] said that’s where authorities found a suicide note addressed to the dead man’s brother.

[Read More]

The Rally Saint Louis project is a first-of-its-kind crowdsourcing and crowdfunding platform that generates ideas and uses funding from the region’s residents and then uses those ideas to help market greater Saint Louis.  It has been over a year in the making, and it’s an effort unlike anything ever attempted, not just in the Saint Louis region, but across the U.S.

Interesting idea. We just hope there are more to the submissions than various hipster activities, and instead see some trying to focus on the big issues standing in the way of making the city considerably more livable: crime, education or swapping out our stale area government officials for shiny new ones.

While it could be said that St. Louis’ MetroLink stations aren’t the most beautiful train stations in the nation, it doesn’t matter. Being bland is actually a clever safety mechanism because you need to focus on the tasks at hand: 1. Board the right train. 2. Don’t get stabbed. You don’t need to look at art, you need to be watching your back, because that fat lady over there half asleep wearing the skin-tight generic security uniform isn’t going to do it. If you have any extra money, lets spring for the fully automated, machine gun armed security drone rather than some dinky art piece some drunk SLU kid is just going to pee on in a week.

Four lawsuits have now been filed against South County’s Castlewood Treatment Center concerning memory implants which is not something we believed to be possible, but now we’re pretty stoked as we’ve always wanted to be a secret agent on Mars!

The allegations made by the former patients include having fake memories that convinced them  that they were victims of satanic ritual abuse, that they witnessed murder, and even memories that they had eaten children. During their treatment at Castlewood, these former patients believed the memories were true. Now, they insist these memories are false.

[Read More]

The stinky lump of empty sadness and RAZR cellphone case carts known as Northwest Plaza is set to be torn down Tuesday, and in it’s place will rise the next chapter in Northwest Plaza lore. It’s return to greatness! …which means what exactly? Oooh! Maybe it’s finally getting a Ms. Fields!

A home improvement store, restaurants, outdoor shopping, an education center and an officer tower are all expected to be added. Security is also expected to be ramped up, with cameras and bike patrols in place to deter crime.

[Read More]

We know, we know. It’s been a rough couple of weeks of posting on here. There’s been two reasons for that:

1. We’ve been busy.

2. The only things going on were horrible election stories.

Both of those situations should be past us, so this week should be better.

In other news, “The Booty Pillow” is a real thing:

No we will not “use it at the office to ease back pain”! You’re the one that took the time to manufacture it with a built-in thong design, so think again before you make that suggestion. Why don’t you just make a pillow that has “I might rape you if we’re both working late because I clearly have issues with women.” embroidered on it, that might be more subtle for the office.

St. Louis-area native, possible Sam Bradford girlfriend, and budding super model Karlie Kloss walked the runway in the Victorias Secret fashion show last night…as a sexy native america indian. Ok, yeah…sure…why not?! They don’t all have to look all mopey and square-jawed like this, while not as helpful against the cold conditions while living in an animal hide supported by sticks, there’s no reason some indians can’t look all small-boobed and sexy and with overly large headdresses like this.

You should go vote right now…unless you’re going to vote for the opposite of what we voted for. If that’s what you’re planning to do, then don’t…or wait, do vote, but did you hear about the change in voting where you have to write down who/what you want to vote for on…um…that napkin on your right…it’s on the floor…there it is. OK, write your stuff on there and then fold it up and turn it in to the nearest Arby’s. They’ll know what to do.

With construction nearly complete, the neighbors of the 2300 block of Telegraph Road now have a castle in their midst. South County finally has it’s “Methingham Palace”.

Kinda weird, but solid idea going with the grey exterior. Going with white would have been a nightmare with all the drunks trying to find your drive-through window at all hours of the night.

It’s still under construction and construction workers on site confirmed the name of the owner, but wouldn’t say anything about why he’s building a castle. The owner hasn’t responded to News 4’s request for information.

[Read More]

It snuck up on us this year, but here we are, Halloween. Do you have a costume? No?! Well don’t worry. We got your back, like we have the past few years (2011, 2010, 2009):

1. The Cardinals

Show up to the party and be pretty great for a few hours and then just fall on your face. Get up and go back to being good until right at the end of the night where you’ll need to start coughing and continually choking until someone comes up and asks you to leave.