In the most recent issue of ESPN The Magazine (July 13, 2009) they released their annual Ultimate Standings where they grade all NBA, NFL and MLB teams in things like “Stadium Experience,” “Fan Relations,” and “Ownership.”

In the “Bang for the Buck” category, which is “wins over the past year per revenues directly from fans, adjusted for league schedules”, the Rams came in dead last, as in 122 out of 122.  Well done guys.

With the All-Star game in our fair city this year, there will be more out-of-towners roaming the cracked sidewalks of St. Louis than normal and every other baseball city will churn out a “Your Guide to St. Louis” post in the next week.  The first one we found was from The Chicago Tribune: “St. Louis: Your guide to the All-Star city“

This is a great baseball town. Cardinal fans know to applaud for a sacrifice bunt, especially when laid down by their pitcher. They know not to applaud when the other team ties the score on a sacrifice fly, even though it means an out for the opponent. They dress in red as if it were the only color on the racks.

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Last night the Cardinals acquired the guy every one knew they wanted, Mark DeRosa, from the Cleveland Indians in exchange for “close of the future” Chris Perez and the always infamous “Player to be Named Later” (aka PTBNL).

For quick bites of analysis, we turn to Punching Kitty favorite Bernie Miklasz (via Twitter):

Overall thoughts on the trade?

@miklasz: I’ve been a DeRosa advocate so I love the move. His bat, versatility, ability to hit LH and clubhouse class make this a good deal.

Yup, right there on the front page of STLToday’s Cardinals Sports page you find Derrick Goold of the PD and… twittering away while he follows around Cardinal players in the early beautiful Florida mornings.

For the record, we think this kind of stuff is great and we definitely like it as opposed to just having the one Twitter account that blasts out every story.  Those types of Twitter accounts are great for blogs (like this one!) but for big sites and TV stations, its just a little too much…like drinking from a fire-hose.  Having Goold actually on the other end sending out quick notes is a nice change of pace and something we can follow without having it take over our Twitter stream.

We hear Cy Young winning pitcher and White Sox ace, Mark Buehrle, was over at Fast Eddie’s yesterday.  

Buehrle is from the St. Louis area (he graduated from Francis Howell North) and his family still lives in town, so this is of little surprise, but its just nice to hear he gets back to the area in the offseason and partakes in some of the local favorites even after hitting the big time.

…I’m assuming.

I mean, its a safe bet right?  Look at the history:

1. Kurt does well but then after repeated beatings from a crappy offensive line, he play and health deteriorates to a point that St. Louis is forced to go with Marc Bulger.

2. St. Louis’s Overbearing Christians think the Rams and the people that support their decision hate Kurt not for this shoddy play, but because people hate his faith.

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Two things are clear from that graphic above: 1. My photoshop skills are l33t.  2. St. Louis’ collective love for Kurt Warner hasn’t been this high since…well since he took our football team to the Super Bowl.

But why do we collectively love this guy so much?  If you have been around St. Louis for a while now you are saying “What?!   Kurt Warner is like if Jesus knew karate!  He’s just too amazing to understand!”  Well, what if you are new to St. Louis, or you are a google searching putting up his feet on our little cyber dive-bar here for a quick drink in the desert that is the internet?  Kurt left town 7 or 8 years ago people!  Everyone could use a refresher course!  So let PunchingKitty.com count the reasons…

Oh thats right ladies!  St. Louis might not have Fleet Week, but this year we have The 2009 U.S. Chess Championship!

Two dozen of the nation’s best chess players will be invited to participate in the 2009 U.S. Chess Championship, which will be held at the new Chess Club and Scholastic Center of Saint Louis. The tournament, which dates back to 1845, will take place from May 7 through 17, 2009 and will offer a purse of more than $130,000 in prize money.

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Now with Update! (See below)

Yup, even in the offseason, the Cubs suck.

Via amyalcin on Twitter

Update! We got a hold of some higher-res versions suitable for printing and/or t-shirt making: