Poopstock making a stop in Dallas? Not quite, but Dallas was treated to another classic performance by St. Louis’ favorite shitty band, Kings of Leon!

Kings of Leon cut short a concert in Dallas last night, when frontman Caleb Followill suddenly told the audience his voice was “100% wrong” and that he felt too hot as temperatures reached the 90s. In a rambling speech, he said he would go backstage to vomit and drink a beer, then return to play three more songs. He didn’t come back to the stage.

Oh no way, we’re totally shocked. Who would have thought that this band of douche bags would play a few songs and then just bail in the middle of a concert? It’s definitely not like these assholes have done this twice now or anything. Oh, there is one little difference between St. Louis infamous Poopstock and the latest ear turd the fellas laid in Dallas: Kings of Leon don’t think the Dallas fans are idiots.

[Jared Followill, brother and fellow band member of Caleb] later wrote: “I love our fans so much. I know you guys aren’t stupid. I can’t lie. There are problems in our band bigger than not drinking enough Gatorade”

F*ck. You.

Oh so this time you have a problem with your lead singer bailing on shows in the middle of them because he’s a drunken dickhead who is little more than a poorly copied version of every crappy boy band member who thinks they are a real artist because they can play guitar and drink for inspiration like all the others they read about on Wikipedia, but is actually the latest dropping in the everlasting bowel movement that the bankrupt music industry has squatted down and pooped out on the chest of America year after year…but that last time in St. Louis? That excuse was real. No seriously you guys! There was a problem with bird poop! We’re totally serious! We Swear! Even if we didn’t have sources that we strongly believe telling us that there was definitely no “bird shit” situation on the stage that fateful night in St. Louis and the band was, in fact, spending most of their pre-show moments bitching about being here and trying to figure a way out of the show, we still wouldn’t believe these assholes.

So Kings of Leon, the band that between beer, vomit and “bird poop” must go through more tight white v-neck t-shirts than a whole summer at the Jersey Shore, thinks St. Louis is full of dummies, but Dallas, those are the fans you shouldn’t try to fool and apologize profusely too over Twitter? Well that’s pretty annoying, but there are silver linings to all of this. One, maybe a few less people will be fans of these pieces of crap and two, we’re just delighted to be able to use our “birds poop on Kings of Leon” graphic one more time.

via Wall Street Journal

Recap of Poopstock coverage: Kings of Leon Are a Bunch of Little Bitches; Because a Bird Shit on Kings of Leon, They Shit on Their St. Louis Fans; Translating Kings of Leon’s Poopstock Memo; Poopstock: Kings of Leon Announce PR-Fixing Concert

The last time faux-rock group Kings of Leon appeared in St. Louis they played three songs, got shit-faced…whoops, I mean shit on, and then left in a huff whining about anything and everything. Here’s what we said at the time:

Jesus these guys are freaking retarded. You too big of a star to just move your little corporate-emo bitch ass 2 feet to the left? Also, you’re a bassist…close your mouth. Is it really the venue’s fault, the open-air venue’s fault, that a bird pooped on you? Yell “Dude!”, spit, get a drink of water and keep going you douche bags! “You may enjoy being shit on but we don’t.” … apparently Queens of Leon do enjoy all over their fans though if this is the best they could do. Congratulations, you just outted yourself to even your most die-hard fans that you are no more “rock” than Hanna Montana.

Once was “Poopstock” is now “PR-stock” as Kings of Leon were in town all weekend to redo that fateful show and even take in a show of their own.

On Saturday night at Verizon Wireless Ampitheatre, the band played a full show this time and did acknowledge the circumstances according to STLToday’s Kevin Johnson:

Lead singer Caleb Followill spent the last night of the band’s current tour telling the Verizon crowd how much he appreciated his fans for coming back to this rescheduled show. Five songs in, after treating the crowd to “Crawl,” “My Party” and others, Followill said it was time for a drink, and toasted the crowd for coming back.

Without ever mentioning pigeons or feces (was he contractually gagged?) Followill repeatedly told the crowd how glad they were fans returned and how they were happy to return to St. Louis, capped with Followill stating canceling a show isn’t a joke.

“I don’t know what to say,” he said. “It’s never a funny thing, especially if people spend their hard-earned money.”

Johnson even seemed to think that the hatchet was buried after the do-over show saying:

“Are you guys having a good time?” Followill asked, checking in with fans. And it felt as if they were, leaving behind any ill will it may have had for the band.

…well, maybe the band’s actual fans and specifically ones hard core enough to come back to the free make-up show are cool, but to say that Kings of Leon are high on St. Louis’ list might be a bit of a stretch. We’ve heard from several accounts that the band got tickets to the Rams’ win over the Redskins Sunday afternoon and when shown on the Jumbotron, the crowd mercilessly booed them.

Good luck on that PR Kings of Leon, but it seems you don’t even have to step on stage these days to get shit on. Also of note is that we accidentally heard their music the other day and probably would have really enjoyed it if we would have been a 13-year old girl with brain tumor and wants something she can turn up loud enough to cover up the sounds of the voices in our head telling us to burn things.

Yes, its old news now, but power-emo band Kings of Leon, the band now famous for quitting on their St. Louis audience last month because of excessive bird poopy, is planning their return to St. Louis and, interestingly, Verizon Wireless Amphitheater.

“As soon as what happened happened, we knew we were going to come back,” Kings of Leon bassist Jared Followill said. “We knew (leaving) would be horrible, and we knew people were not going to be happy. We were just trying to figure out the best way and the easiest way to get back and make it better.”

The show, which will go down September 25th, will be free to ticket holders of the last “show” and there will be additional seats for only $10. Kings of Leon are taking no money from the gate of the make-up show and are already building up expectations:

Fans are getting as good, if not better, a production than what they would have gotten before.

…so they’ll play 5 songs this time? I mean you say dumb crap (un-intended pun…kinda) like that when you last show was 3 songs long and you’re asking for people to turn that around on you.

Oh and they totally read our coverage of what we coined as “Poopstock”.

“We don’t care about the news stories,” [bassist Jared] Followill said. “We care about the personal stories, like from the fans who’d come a long way to see the concert.”

What bothered the band “was the misinformation,” Followill said. “There were so many things that were fabricated, things people were confused about.”

Wait…you didn’t leave the stage after three songs?! Could the crowd just not see or hear you under all the bird poop?

Followill said management wanted the band to leave after the first song but, after watching their fans rocking out, they couldn’t. By the third song, he said, he could see management getting angry with them for not leaving the stage, and they had to pull the plug.

Ok, so you aren’t a pussy, your management is? …I guess we can believe…

Followill said that he would have stayed longer but that “after 30 songs, I would’ve been covered. It was disgusting. I wanted to throw up when it was on my face.”

…learn when to stop talking Jared.

Followill said he’s not sure how his brother Caleb, the band’s singer, will acknowledge “Pigeongate” on Sept. 25, although he’s sure he will, perhaps humorously.

Fans almost certainly will. It won’t be a shock if some turn up in pigeon costumes.

“Hopefully, that would only make the band laugh,” Jared Followill said. “I thought it would’ve happened in other cities, but it hasn’t.”

A pidgin costume?! We were thinking even more straight to the point: A vagina costume, holding a guitar with a little speck of white on it.

via The Blender

Lets be honest, we’ve called Kings of Leon all kinds of fun things in the last few days after their now infamous pouting scene after getting pooped on made its way around the globe. Nothing too bad though, just light hearted jokes.

7/24 – They’re giant pussies.

7/24 – Jesus these guys are freaking retarded.

7/24 – Congratulations, you just outted yourself to even your most die-hard fans that you are no more “rock” than Hanna Montana.

7/23 – Sounds like Kings of Leon had a serious case of Rock “star” sandy vagina.

Ahem.

What do we know though? Yes Kings of Leon are in fact little bitch-asses. It’s a fact, but we should have more reason that just us saying so. We need to have some big bad ass guy tell you so you know its true…Well we know a guy. Kyle Turley was a certified bad ass on the football field, currently he’s a bad ass on the stage, and a friend-of-the-site. We reached out for a comment on what he thought about this whole situation with Kings of Leon. We were not disappointed.

“I guess when you make it to the top, you don’t have to take it in the mouth anymore [in public]” – Kyle Turley

Thanks Kyle. We knew you’d know just want to say.

By the way, Kyle is on tour, so to check out where he’s at these days and pick up his new album head to Gridiron Records.com

Found on YouTube: A video taken by someone that waited a very long time to get to the front of the Zac Efron line when he came into town for a showing of his movie Charlie St. Cloud at Ronnies in South County.

You can hear screams of “I love your hair!” and “Don’t leave!” throughout the clip. Also, if you look closely, a pigeon tries to poop on Efron at one point but a beautiful bald eagle swoops by at the last second to kill the pigeon. Afterwards Efron commented that if it had pooped on his successfully he would have kept going “Its not like I’m some little bitch or something.”

Also seen here is a picture we drew of the St. Louis media beating this dead horse (we’re on the right with the cape and the badass lightsaber):

It’s official. This whole Kings of Leon/Poopstock thing is out of control. How do we know? When fake Twitter accounts start hitting its out of control.

View his profile at: twitter.com/kolpigeon