Yeah. I came back for this. I pick and choose when I show up now, and I’ve skipped a lot of crazy stuff since I’ve been gone, but I can assure you the Blues winning the goddamned Stanley Cup qualifies.

This is indeed a crazy time for us all, and it feels weird because it’s a good crazy which a lot of you are very much not used to. Don’t be scared! Enjoy this time and ride out these strange feelings of happiness. If things get a bit too trippy, just remember that the Cardinals suck and there’s probably a new bill in the Missouri state senate that requires all women install a small inflatable slide in their vaginas to allow any fetuses easy exit in the case of a water landing. What I’m saying is that things will get back to normal really fast.

For those unaware, St. Louis has a hockey team and it’s up for sale again.

Dave Checketts, the owner of the St. Louis Blues since 2005, has put his chunk of the team up for sale after months of trying to find other partners after the bulk of his initial backing left.

So Checketts will step out of the way and put his personal stake on the market with the hope of expediting a sale. Checketts and his investment firm, SCP Worldwide, own approximately 20 percent of the Blues. TowerBrook owns 70 percent. Local beer distributor Tom Stillman and other minority investors account for the other 10 percent.

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February 18th, 2011…a day that will live in infamy for St. Louis sports. Well, maybe not…unless you’re really attached to the Rams’ O.J. Atogwe, the Blue’s Eric Brewer and the shell of Jim Edmonds. If you are, go get yourself a coke and try to shake it off! Tomorrow will be better…don’t look at STLToday’s Sports home page though. Actually, just turn away right now, because here it is!

Seriously check this crap out: Every single major sports team in St. Louis lost a player through either trade, release, or retirement.

Battle of the Blades is to Canada what Dancing with the Stars is to America. The differences being “Blads” is hockey players instead of D-list celebrities and it’s on ice. So what about Canada? Well former St. Louis Blues badass Kelly Chase is on this season.

If you thought for a second that he’s dancing with Michelle Kwan, you’re a racist. If you thought Not-Michelle Kwan was dancing with late-nineties Brenda Warner, we don’t blame you.

Post updated per reader suggestion. See below original story.

Josh Duhamel, shown here with his husband, is staring in the new movie “Life as We Know It” with Katherine Heigl.The movie is about two people who are polar opposites that have to take care of a baby. Uh oh! Sounds like this isn’t going to be what they signed up for! He’s probably a slob and she’s a little Ms. Perfect. This match up can’t possibly work! …oh wait, now it does! Roll credits.

The Blues Win Something! Hello? Hello?! They Won Something. No one cares?

Ok, we might have been overselling it somewhat. They didn’t really win anything…but their stadium did!

According to ESPN, out of the three major sporting venues in St. Louis, only the Blues’ home, the Scottrade Center, score perfect with no “critical violations”. The score is a percentage of vendors with health code violations out of the total vendors.

Pretty much one of the worst St. Louis sporting nights I can ever remember.

The Cardinals lose in pretty much the worst way possible to go down 0-2 in the NLDS, right now Mizzou dropped their first game of the season, the Rams still have St. Louis in front of their name, and the Blues lost!

…oh and at the Blues game one of the escalators freaked out, spun up to four times the normal speed and launched four fans right off of it!

In the most recent issue of ESPN The Magazine (July 13, 2009) they released their annual Ultimate Standings where they grade all NBA, NFL and MLB teams in things like “Stadium Experience,” “Fan Relations,” and “Ownership.”

In the “Bang for the Buck” category, which is “wins over the past year per revenues directly from fans, adjusted for league schedules”, the Rams came in dead last, as in 122 out of 122.  Well done guys.