Are the St. Louis Zoo’s Halloween Decorations Racist?

 Posted on October 17, 2012  |  The Editor

The St. Louis Zoo put up their Halloween decorations a few days ago and man did they screw up. It turns out the Zoo outed itself as a secret racist organization! We knew it. It always seemed fishy that the black panthers were always in the crappy cage in the back corner, the one with a busted-ass car in it for some reason, but the white tiger had like the best cage ever right up front. [Read More]
halloween  racism  zoo 

Two Harbor Seals Died on Their Way to the St. Louis Zoo

 Posted on June 11, 2012  |  The Editor

The St. Louis Zoo was expecting the arrival of four harbor seals in time for the June 30th opening of the new “Sea Lion Sound” exhibit, but two of the sea lions died in the trip and had to be left at the Indianapolis Zoo as it was in need of medical treatment as well. We guess hitchhiking from Canada isn’t as safe as it used to be. The animals, two mother-daughter pairs, were examined before departure and checked frequently while in transit, said Steve Bircher, curator of mammals at the St. [Read More]
animals  zoo 

Newt Gingrich Was Bitten By a St. Louis Zoo Penguin

 Posted on April 17, 2012  |  The Editor

Newt Gingrich, former Speaker of the House and who’s current hobbies include pretending to still be involved in presidential candidate races was in St. Louis last weekend and, as reported on Twitter yesterday via several animal-based puns, was nipped by a penguin while visiting the St. Louis Zoo. During his visit to the popular zoo in Forest Park, he was treated to a behind-the-scenes visit with two Magellanic penguins. One of them nipped Gingrich on the finger. [Read More]
newt gingrich  penguin  zoo 

If You Pay For the Zoo, Then Take Some Cheap Parking

 Posted on May 11, 2011  |  The Editor

A proposal has been laid out that would give discounts on things like parking or admission at the city’s major tax-funded attractions to city residents. For instance, the Zoo would offer discounted parking to all city residents…except for those that live close enough to walk, who get nothing we guess. Maybe we can give them a balloon with a zebra on it or something? Gloria Wessels recently suggested that four of the five institutions funded by the zoo-museum district offer discounts on parking, concessions and special exhibits to visitors who live in the taxing district. [Read More]
city  museum  taxes  zoo 

Oh the Humanity: Zoo Train Derails

 Posted on October 18, 2010  |  The Editor

The train that takes the wheezing fat parents that turn to their excited child and say “Maybe…maybe…wheeew….maybe we take the train for a little….while? That’ll be fun huh? …no, walking isn’t always fun and we can see the monkeys some other time…lets just ride the train for a little while and then, ooooohhh! Dippin Dots!” derailed Saturday afternoon in a tunnel near “Big Cat Country”. No one was injured. One car had derailed wheels about 5 inches off the track, but it did not tip over. [Read More]
train  zoo 

St. Louis Zoo Won’t Charge You. Stop Whining.

 Posted on February 16, 2010  |  The Editor

The Missouri State Senate continues to make me believe that that are comprised of nothing but morons. Not only did they recently take a unneeded swipe at Missouri’s gentlemen bars, but now they’re trying to make our special Zoo less special. Recently University City’s State Senator Joan Bray proposed legislation that would charge any non-St. Louis County residents for admission. Well the Zoo was all like “Whateva!” and released the following statement: [Read More]
charge  joan bray  state senate  zoo 

Slut.

 Posted on January 21, 2010  |  The Editor

St. Louis’ first elephant family is pregnant again. As the Post Dispatch reported: The St. Louis Zoo is expecting a 300-pound bundle of joy next summer. Asian elephant Rani is almost five months into her 22-month pregnancy. Raja, the first elephant ever born at the St. Louis Zoo, is the father. Rani is eating her regular diet of grain and hay and has stepped up her exercise routine, said Martha Fischer, the zoo’s mammal curator. [Read More]
elephant  rain  raja  zoo