Merry Christmas Everyone!

We’ll be back next week after taking a couple of days off for Christmas.

It’s a long time until Monday, and since you’re probably going to be lost without our guidance, here’s a few little tips to get you through the holiday:

5. Die Hard is the best Christmas movie of all time. Shut up about It’s a Wonderful Life or Elf.

4. It’s on the record now, even the Mayor’s office isn’t safe:

3. Remember ladies, the Sexy Mrs. Claus outfit is always a great move this weekend, unless, of course you’re a large lady, in which case the Mrs. Claus outfit makes you look like a North Pole tranny. If you’re big just forget we said anything…oh look over there! Cookies!

2. Reminder: Even a candy cane can be licked down to a point and shoved in to your chest while they take your car. We would recommend just staying away from the Galleria completely to be on the safe side.

1. For us, don’t make your cat wear stupid stuff.