Dumbass Electrocuted While Trying to Steal Copper Wire

Despite our previous thoughts on the matter, it turns out that one doesn’t have to know what role something fills in order to steal it. Take for instance a Washington Park man that was electrocuted and subsequently killed Saturday morning when he tried to steal copper wire from an Ameren Illinois substation.

When their service people arrived at the site of the outtage they found the dead man, whom police have not yet identified. Busch said 530 residences in Washington Park, Fairmont City, Venice and East St. Louis were without power until shortly after 8 a.m. Saturday. The substation was a crime scene so Ameren’s repair crew had to wait for the police to finish investigating before they could restore power.

It would be one thing if he was electrocuted in some honorable pursuit like saving a child or trying to get away from some homeless guy trying to ask him for some change, but the moment they found out the guy was just trying to steal copper and moronically killed himself they should have just rolled him over with a stick and fixed the power. No one should miss late night weekend infomercials because of a horrible thief.

This has got to be an all-time stupid story right? Who would try to steal live copper wire? First one ever right?!

The company has not experienced such an incident for a while, Busch said.

For a while?

“It’s unfortunate that this guy had to die of this,” said [Victoria Busch, spokesperson for Ameren Illinois], adding that there are warning signs posted at the substation. “We try to educate our customers as much as we can about dangers around electricity and natural gas. But sometimes that education doesn’t sink in.”

…and it just got somehow more stupid. Signs? Thieves don’t pay attention to signs. If they did, you could just put up a “Please don’t steal our stuff.” sign and St. Louis would turn in to Salt Lake City but with less high school dry humping. Actually no one pays attention to signs! It would be sweet if our “get naked, make me a sandwich, and then do sexy stuff to my junk” sign would work more places than just the prison cafeteria. No idea why they let us in the prison tour with that sign…it’s almost like they knew what would happen. Horrible sandwich too. No one’s going to be able to forget about the rapings with just regular yellow mustard.

via STLToday