St. Louis Prepares for the Coming of Snooki

So far St. Louis has had Jersey Shore’s The Situation visit downtown herpes petri dish F15teen, we’ve been taken over by New Jersey on South Park and at some point Paulie D played music in town while wearing headphones…but only one ear pressed in to them so he looks like a cool DJ and doesn’t hurt his hair, so the fact that Snooki is now coming to town along with WWE’s Raw next week is of little surprise.

She is a New York Times best selling author, a reality star on cable’s highest rated series Jersey Shore* and currently graces the cover of Rolling Stone Magazine, but will she get Raw next Monday?

Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi will bring the party to Monday Night Raw at the Scottrade Center in St. Louis, Mo. on Monday, March 14 as the guest star. Raw will air live from St. Louis at 9/8c on USA Network.

If professional wrestling and Snookie from Jersey Shore are coming to town at the same time, we might as well go all in by burning down a library and constructing a Fuddruckers in it’s place. Maybe she’ll prove us wrong though and use her time in the WWE spotlight to read from her best selling book “A Shore Thing” Sure she’ll have to show the pictures to the pro wrestling crowd, but with passenges like this…

He had an okay body. Not fat at all. And naturally toned abs. She could pour a shot of tequila down his belly and slurp it out of his navel without getting splashed in the face.

or

Gia danced around a little, shaking her peaches for show. She shook it hard. Too hard. In the middle of a shimmy, her stomach cramped. A fart slipped out. A loud one. And stinky.

…you’re sure to with the crowd over! Or they may just fluff up the back hair poking out of their home-made sleeveless t-shirt and take a nap.

No, they’ll probably do something other than reading…well actually we don’t know having never seen a pro wresting anything. Despite our inexperience, we know enough to realize that this isn’t a good sign:

via Lords of Pain