We miss the days when flashers rocked the long trench coat, walked right up to people and just put it out there and sometimes, if they are really good, threw in a little wiggle for good measure. Today’s flashers, are just too damn lazy! Take for instance this schmuck in Webster Groves:
Police in Webster Groves and Brentwood are looking for a man who exposed himself to young girls four different times.
Police said in all four cases, the man would call girls over to his vehicle and ask them for directions. As they approached the vehicle, they realized the man was not wearing any pants. The girls ran away and the suspect did not pursue them.
Damn flashers today…the nerve! Making the girls come to you? Lazy ass. This is what’s wrong with America today. If you want a girl to see your penis, you gotta work at it! Sure flashing is a bit of a shortcut, but you should at least get up and walk to where they are! Don’t forget, this isn’t the first time we’ve heard of this “technique”: Wait You Can’t Pay For Your Lemonade With Penis?
If you are a stalker, take the time to do it right! Get that trench coat, perfect your wiggle, and do it right!
…also don’t go near Webster Groves and Brentwood, those areas are pretty worked over right now.
For any tips on this lazy sicko, call: 314-266-TIPS