Police Say Your Downtown Parked Car Might Get Stolen, Public Replies With “Duh.”

Friday night, 62 cars were broken into downtown, most of them just south of Busch Stadium. It’s time like these when we wish the police would tell us everything’s going to be ok and that not to worry, they’ve got things under control. We don’t live in a town where you can’t even go to a ballgame without thinking about what inning you should leave to go get your car rather than thinking about what inning you have to leave before your deluxe nachos make a reappearance south of the border, do we?

Of course we do.

Police Captain Mike Caruso tells KMOX it’s time for parking lot owners to watch their lots even after they’ve taken a driver’s money.

And, if you’re not parking on a lot, Captain Caruso recommends leaving nothing in sight inside a car, locking the car, parking in lighted areas and never hesitating to call 9-1-1 when someone suspicious is loitering near a car.

“it’s time for parking lot owners to watching their lots”? When the hell was it not their time to do that? Sure no one has any assumption of security on those lots where you have to fold up your five dollars (or…ahem…your two dollars folded over a bunch of times because how would they know?!) and put it in the corresponding parking space slot, but the lots for $10 and up with the attendant in the little booth? Those should give you peace of mind…but they don’t.

Police are stepping up patrols.  One undercover car theft unit operating Saturday night made its first arrest shortly before 5.pm.

Hey alright! Got one! Why didn’t anyone tell the police that people steal cars downtown? If they would have known, they would have started trying harder earlier! Like how when we finally found out that girls rarely look up when using a public restroom we had already gotten too big for the air vent…we could still fit in there, but we couldn’t really move our arms so that kinda defeats the purpose.

via KMOX