Raccoon Attacks Infant Because of a Headband

Kids these days dress too dammed provocatively! They’re out there letting everything hang out and it just keeps getting younger and younger. Damn 4-day old’s and their Raccoon attracting headbands!

A four day old girl is said to be recovering well, after being attacked by a raccoon owned by her grandparents!

Pike County, Illinois Sheriff Paul Petty says the girl suffered about a dozen puncture wounds and a large cut to her head in the attack, which occured in Griggsville, about 100 miles north of St. Louis.

The grandparents say the animal attacked because it was attracted to a headband the child was wearing.

Of course, the poor raccoon has now been killed so it may be fully tested for diseases. Damn shame. Sure he should have controlled himself, but honestly though? The way that baby was dressed with that attractive headband and all? …totally asking for it.

via KMOX.com