Craigslist: A Love Connection at the New Moon Showing

NathanWhat’s better than going to see your favorite girl-movie about non-scary flavors of vampires and werewolves at midnight?  Going there and falling in love…and then smelling her hair…and following her to her house…and stealing things out of her car.  Awww love.

New Moon midnight showing – m4w – 27 (Saint Louis, MO)

I sat behind you at the midnight showing of New Moon the other night. Me: 6 foot, dark hair, long nails, mysterious. You: straight long blond hair, full ruby lips, you were wearing black cargo pants and a twilight hoodie. As your hair draped down behind your sear i just had to hold it and smell it deeply(pantene.great choice). I don’t remember much of the money but I will awlays remember the smell and texture of your hair. The way you sound when you whisper and laugh. After the movie I followed you and your friends to Denny’s. I waited outside in my car so I could watch you eat and smile. I followed you home and made sure you got there safely. I noticed you left your car unlocked so I went to have a look into your life. I can tell by looking in your car that we have a lot in common. If you want your dash ornaments back you will have to meet me and we can have a great time getting to know each other. “grin”

Although I’m happy he  left out the part about his masturbating back in his mom’s basement with Pantene spread on his chest and holding your dash accouterments, but that doesn’t mean the mental picture didn’t show up.

If you are the blonde girl wearing cargo pants described above, change your locks and buy a gun.  Unless you are in to tall, dark mysterious guys with long fingernails…and that are probably required by law to notify all new neighbors of his past transgressions, then go for it. Hell you won’t even have to call him, he’s standing outside your bedroom window right now!