Jesus Dude. Damn! Come on Cardinals.

Aaron “I’m horrible but plucky” Miles manning third base? Randy Winn?! The Astros have nothing. They should be the ones playing Randy Winn and Miles! Oh did you miss the game? It didn’t go well. This is how I will sum it up for you: Aaron. Miles. Pitching. 18-4 Astros. The Cardinals are freaking terrible. Yes, we are right there atop the division, but so what? Are the playoffs really that cool when you just get blasted out of them right when you walk in? [Read More]

Cards Trade Ludwick: Everyone’s Pissed but Jake Westbrook

A few hours before the Major League Baseball trading deadline passed, the Cardinals brass pulled the trigger on a three-team deal that brought back a pitching prospect from the San Diego Padres and veteran starting picture Jake Westbrook from the Cleveland Indians while sending right-fielder Ryan Ludwick to the Padres in return.

Everyone is pissed. Well not everyone…Jake Westbrook is stoked.

“I’m excited to go to a club that’s contending for a playoff spot and pitch in some meaningful ballgames,” Westbrook said. “That’s why you play the game, to get a chance to play in the playoffs and I look forward to doing that.”

Well that’s nice. Good for him. Get really for a cold clammy welcome Jake!

Compared to the views within the walls of Busch Stadium, those fan tweets are nearly cheers.

Asked if he was surprised by the deal, Chris Carpenter waited 12 seconds before responding.

“The loss of Ludwick is something that surprised me,” the ace eventually said. “In turn, you have to give up something to get something. Unfortunately it was Ryan. … I can only speak for myself and not for everybody else. It’s nice to acquire a guy like Westbrook, and it’s hard to lose a guy like Ludwick. There’s no question.”

He paused five seconds.

“It will be interesting to see.”

Cold vibes coming from Carpenter, but the off-the-record Cardinal quotes Joe Strauss got are much better:

[Read More]

Stadium Health Inspection Report: The St. Louis Blues Are Really Clean

The Blues Win Something! Hello? Hello?! They Won Something. No one cares? Ok, we might have been overselling it somewhat. They didn’t really win anything…but their stadium did! According to ESPN, out of the three major sporting venues in St. Louis, only the Blues’ home, the Scottrade Center, score perfect with no “critical violations”. The score is a percentage of vendors with health code violations out of the total vendors. [Read More]

As the Cardinals Play the Cubs, Lets Take a Look on Their Fans

Another Cubs vs Cardinals series starts this weekend and we felt that is was high time we take a look at a sampling of Cubs fans with a little help from our friends at OtherTeamsFans.com

Some of them are more attractive than others, but one this is for sure, they wouldn’t know what winning felt like if it landed on their face. Which it won’t. Because they like the Cubs and they never win. Get it? The Cubs never win. Ever. They’re horrible. Cardinals are good though. Not the Cubs.

Click through the jump to see the whole set of photos!

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The Cincinnati Red’s Transformation to the 2004 Cardinals is Nearly Complete

The Cincinnati Reds currently count quite a few former Cardinals on their staff, starting from the top with Walt Jockety, and following up with Scott Rolen, Russ Springer, Mike Lincoln, and now, possibly, Jason Isringhausen? You think watching Ryan Franklin every night gives you a ulcer? Izzy’s back ya’ll! Appearing on KFNS 590 The Fan with Doug Vaughn this morning, free agent reliever Jason Isringhausen said he has a tentative plan to audition for the Reds tomorrow. [Read More]

Some Dumbass Church Will Be on a St. Louis Hate Speech Tour This Weekend

The socially retarded hate “church” that runs the site godhatesfags.com (no, they don’t get a link) will be in town Saturday, July 17th, to put up stupid signs and march around so everyone will look at them. Here are snippets of their pubic itinerary: 2:00p – 2:30p @ Staenberg Family JCC You know how to read? Open a paper, or any website news page. I mean do you know that Egypt has made a law that any Egyptian man married to a Jewess shall lose their citizenship? [Read More]

Can Former Cardinal Mike Matheny Crash At Your Place?

Former Cardinal catcher and still crowd favorite Mike Matheny is catching something else these days: Heat from a lawsuit filed against him and a few others by the Business Bank of St. Louis. … Did you see what I did there with saying he was a catcher and then saying he was catching things still, but then at the last second I was all like “Nope, not a baseball like you thought. [Read More]

Matt Holliday Doesn’t Get Out of First Round, but Nets Longest Jack

So no Home Run Derby title for our own Matt Holliday but all is not lost. He wasn’t one of those losers to get nothing over the wall…and he got more than one (well played Chris”Why Am I Here?” Young). In Matty H. just missed the cut to the next round by 2 jacks. Despite his early exit, at least Holliday can hang is hat on having the single longest bomb of the night at 497 feet. [Read More]

The Cardinals Are Horrible

Its not just the bullpen, or the starting pitching, defense or hitting…its everything. The Cardinals suck. Oh we’re only a few games out of first, and we certainly aren’t the Pirates, but for the St. Louis Cardinals, they suck. With this much talent they should be running over people but they aren’t. Its not they don’t have the talent they thought…its just that they flat out aren’t playing well. …so the question must be asked: Is this it for Tony LaRussa? [Read More]