PUNCHING KITTY

A dead guy in a cemetery?! Oh no!

Frankly the police tape seems a bitch much in this situation.  Zombies would just walk right through that crap.

via Globe Democrat

We at Punching Kitty love being in the city during the spring. Walking down the streets of the Looop, with that cool nip in the air that makes it so you can’t decide if you should have brought your coat. Looking at the shine of the streetlights coming off the rain puddles on still on the streets from the night below takes your focus to the point where you don’t even see the little bitch about to sucker punch you as you walk past the Subway.

According to our sources the St. Louis Cardinals have had internal discussions about trading injured so-so shortstop Brendan Ryan to the New York Yankees for All-Star third baseman Alex Rodriguez.

It is not clear whether the Cardinals have brought this idea to the attention of the Yankees. Even if the Yankees were actually to consider this offer it might be a difficult to one to work out as A-Rod is a good contributor and has recently bonded with the New York fans after reclaiming the World Series title in 2009.

In yet another “me too” political action, another St. Louis area is moving to ban smoking.

City leaders could ban smoking in Lake St. Louis.

The aldermen could vote on a proposed ban this evening.

If a ban passes, Lake St. Louis would be the first city in St. Charles County to be smoke free.

Well there’s something to hang your hat on.  No more smoking in all the fine Lake St. Louis establishments like…Schnucks…or…um….Denny’s.  Wait a minute I see what’s going on here…there isn’t any real need to ban smoking in Lake St. Louis!  This must all be a distraction to what they are really banning!  We did a little research and if you actually really the whole ban you can see what’s really going down out there somewhere in the haze of look-a-like homes known as “West of 270 County”:

Update: Fox2’s Charlie Marlow wasn’t happy about this post because John Gadson had a brain tumor that caused these symptoms, which was unknown at the time. Marlow sent us a lovely note about it. We disagree on its level of hypocrisy. Obviously we wish John the best in his battle with cancer.

Original post follows…

According to local news station KTVI, Fox 2 John Gadson has been a reporter there for 10 years which is surprising since I’ve  never seen him before until this report crossed our desk. We’re starting to understand why, and so will you if you watch the video of his latest “reporting” below.

March has been here a while, but only after last Sunday did college basketball fans really start to feel like its here as the NCAA Men’s Basketball tournament is about to begin. This is especially true for our little town as once again we get to host a large chunk of said tournament and according to one CBS analyst, its going to be just like…the Bang Bus pornos?!

For those unfamiliar with the Bang Bus series, here is how Wikipedia describes it:

BabyBeerBottles.com was selling little gag beer bottles that even included a detachable nipple for the top of the “bottle” and logos that looked like Budwiser and Miller Lite.  But not anymore, because Anheuser-Busch InBev [Editor’s Note: Worst. Name. Ever.] is actively suing their balls off.

“Defendants obviously intend to profit from the famous Anheuser-Busch trademarks by confusing and deceiving consumers with defendants’ blatant copying,” A-B writes in a suit filed Monday in federal court in St. Louis. “Defendants’ offensive and inappropriate merchandise tarnishes the distinctive quality of Anheuser-Busch’s trademarks and dilutes the ability of those trademarks to serve as symbols of the high-quality and superior products the public has come to expect from Anheuser-Busch.”

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Everyone is all in a tizzy for this month’s internet Macarena: Chat Roulette [1], where you are automatically connected via video chat to a random stranger also using the site.  Which sounds fun, until you realize that this guy is out there.

We hear at Punching Kitty Headquarters have been racking our brains for a way to take the large ChatRoulette user base and strip away anyone not from St. Louis.  You know, to see what St. Louisans where using the site which could be interesting…but thus far we got nothing.  The best thing about the internet though is that eventually someone else will do your homework and post it online. Chatroulette Map gives you a nice little map laid out with users from Chat Roulette and pinpointed by their IP address!  Nerd stuff!

Um, no.

That’s the rumor though according to an ESPN article.  Internal discussions in the Phillies front office have centered on pitching a deal that would trade one team’s MVP first baseman for another.

The logic for a Howard for Pujols swap, as discussed within the Phillies’ organization, could fall along these lines: Pujols, 30 years old, is eligible for free agency after the 2011 season, and early conversations about a contract extension have not led to any long-term deal. The expectation within baseball is that Pujols may ask for a deal that would rival, in annual value, the record-setting 10-year, $275 million deal that Alex Rodriguez negotiated with the Yankees in fall 2007.

[Read More]

Forbes Magazine’s yearly billionaire list was released and we wanted to share with you St. Louis connected people on that list.  Just when you start to feel superior, here we come with a list of mega-rich old people that could buy and sell your ass like the whore we all know you are.

#123 Jack Taylor, founder of Enterprise Rent-A-Car. Net worth: $6 billion