The Kinloch Fire Department’s economic struggles continue. Blaming it’s troubles on low property tax revenues and falling six months behind on it’s phone bill, the service to it’s non-emergency line has been cut, allowing only 911 calls to go through…which is a bummer because the only people that call that line are all needy and crap.

Back in November, we floated the idea of a big dance show with costumes and the whole deal to raise the money, but none of you showed up for the first practice! We would have been there, but we were totally busy and it was rainy that day.

St. Louis-area native and rock and roll legend Chuck Berry collapsed on stage in Chicago during a performance. Berry had refused medical attention earlier in the night.

“He collapsed due to exhaustion, he then came back out to the crowd and did his ‘duck walk’ dance before leaving for the night,” Andy Riesmeyer of CMG Worldwide, an agency that represents Berry, said in a statement Sunday.

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No injuries to people or planes, but yesterday one taxing plane bumped in to another on the tarmac.

Hamm-Niebrugge says a Philadelphia-bound Embraer was preparing to de-ice when the second plane, an Airbus about to fly to Charlotte, N.C., pulled up and clipped the horizontal bar in the tail area of the Embraer.

It’s being called a “minor” collision by airport authorities, but they have pulled both planes back for inspection. After all, if you have to giant heavy object slamming in to each other, rarely does anything good come out of it. Take for instance the show Roseanne. Roseanne Barr paired with John Goodman?! TV sitcoms are supposed to take me away to a fun pseudo-reality land, not transport me to the Troy, MO Wal-Mart so I can watch a giant fat couple literally sweat out the decision on how many double-stuff Oreo packages they should buy to wait out the snow storm. Roseanne was a horrible show. The most fat and unfunny thing we’d seen since the first time we saw Roseanne Barr.

August Busch IV, St. Louis’ bad boy playboy millionaire, who’s family beer-making business was sold to InBev a few years ago, had yet another run in with Johnny Law recently when a dead woman was found last Sunday in his South Lindbergh mansion. The woman, 27 year old Adrienne Nicole Martin, was a former girlfriend of Busch. Pretty suspicious that a woman was found dead in a mansion and the mansion was owned by her boyfriend, and the boyfriend has had a few issues with the law in his past right…and that all day Sunday my trick knee was aching which usually means there’s been a disturbance in the Hooters waitress force?

Like the Tyrannosaurus Rex, the MetroLink train’s vision is based on movement. Still, motionless objects are effectively invisible to these large beasts of burdon, making things like a stalled flatbed truck on the tracks so hard to avoid.

Witnesses said the train, headed eastbound, hit the flat-bed truck that was stalled at the North Market crossing around 5:30 p.m.

A red truck with “Mr. JP Towing” on the side was wedged against a pole about 200 feet south of where North Market crosses the MetroLink tracks.

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I don’t want to shock you, but we hear that a store selling “adult-themed” products is being harassed in the town of Pevely, Missouri. Who would have thought a small Missouri town, just south of St. Louis, would be unwelcoming of a sexy store selling lingerie, lubricants and “other marital aides”?! Shocked. We’re shocked. Also did you hear about that old asian guy driving slowly down 40 the other day? Since when are old asian guys not burning up the roads? Everything is shocking!!

There are some lawsuit case files you don’t want to read, but there are others you just can’t put down, like really great book, or something glued to your hands.

Take for instance the case of Calvin West and Baldor Electric Company.

Mr. West was let go from his post at Baldor and filed for unemployment, which was blocked by Baldor because, as they claim, he was fired for cause. (Hang with us here, it gets good in a second) What cause you ask? For leaving work without permission…to sexually harass a fellow employee.

The famous St. Louis sex blogger that recently came out and revealed her previously hidden identity, Kendra Holliday of The Beautiful Kind.com is suddenly in a fight for the custody of her daughter.

“I have officially received the lawsuit papers from my ex-husband—he is suing me for full custody of my daughter,” Holliday said today. “The reasons listed in the lawsuit all point to my sexuality. I am shocked and disappointed that my ex would resort to this, as previously he supported my decision to come out. I am contacting lawyers today, and have set up a legal defense fund.”

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After rollouts in Dallas, Los Angeles and Colorado Springs, St. Louis’ Salvation Army wing is finally killing everyone’s favorite excuse “Sorry, I don’t have any change on me.”

The Salvation Army is hoping that adding a credit card option will help increase donations to its red kettles in the St. Louis area.

Salvation Army officials hope the new option will attract people who aren’t carrying cash or change. Average donations jumped from $2 to $15 when donors used electronic payment machines in Dallas, Los Angeles and Colorado Springs in 2008.

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Earlier this year we talked about Hopeville, the homeless camp downtown underneath the Tucker Boulevard tunnel until the city kicked them all out in May because it probably smelled a lot like pee and sadness, which is ok when we go to visit Grandma, but not when we walk down Tucker.

While Hopeville I is gone, as planned, Hopeville II was created so that there could be another really really sad place named something that sounds really really happy. Irony is awesome and St. Louis is full of it. _Well_ston is anything but “well”, _Kings_highway, looks like a dog scrapped his poopy butt through St. Louis rather than a road for kings and Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd is nothing but people getting shot all the time…wait, that one makes sense.