When You Gotta Go in Midtown, Do It at The Fountain on Locust

Midtown restaurant The Fountain on Locust has been nominated and is now a finalist for the America’s Best Restroom contest being put on by the Cintas Corporation, who makes crappers, but probably doesn’t like people calling them “crappers”. What’s so special about The Fountain on Locust? The Fountain on Locust’s bathroom was picked because of its hand-painted murals, ornate fixtures and designer mirrors. You can vote online for the final round at www. [Read More]

The 10 Best “Texts From Last Night” From the 314

From the website, Texts From Last Night, we present to you the Top 10 texts from the 314 area code! #10: i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting. #9: Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us. #8: I hated hipsters before it was mainstream. [Read More]

St. Louis Has Underground Explosions Now

Add it to the list of things St. Louis gets: Underground explosions. Around 5p Wednesday evening, City Hall was shaken by an underground explosion, which they said it was a blown transformer…no, not the cool kind of Transformer, but the boring kind that AmerenUE breaks every winter and summer…and fall…and spring. Government excuses bullshit. Our guess? That’s were we buried former Cardinal Ray King after we “traded” him a while back. [Read More]

Woah! Be Cool STLToday. No One Needs to Get Hurt Today.

Ok…there’s no reason we can’t all walk away from this. Click on an ad? Sure. Whatever you want…um which one? Uh…we mean we don’t see them because they are so unobtrusive and not at all annoying when they roll over what I’m trying to read and can’t go back up. Look, if you want to keep paying Jeff Gordon to do who knows what, that’s fine. It has nothing to do with us…lets just not take this to a point where you can’t turn back man. [Read More]

Whoops!: STLToday Has the Best Ads

Found by a reader on STLToday over the weekend:

We aren’t sure at this time if the glue would have helped keep the swing together better or if STLToday is suggesting we actually put the child back together with Elmers.

More as this story develops.

Blind Item: Old Man and the Sea…of Urine…in a Parking Lot

Which old-timer St. Louis sports announcer was spotted deciding it was quicker to just whip it out and pee in the parking lot, in broad daylight, instead of heading inside for a real bathroom? In other news, the above mentioned’s employer is more pissed off than pissed on about the the performance the deal they signed that included the old parking lot pisser, trying desperately to dump the broadcast contract. [Read More]

Three Chicks Got Hit By Lightning

“Hey its storming. Lets go to the park!” “Ow.” “Did we just get hit by lightning?” “I think so.” “We should tell someone.” “Ok. How about a park ranger?” “Sounds good to me.” “I’m going to sit down.” As storms rolled through the area Monday, three females on their way to St. Vincent County Park said they believed they were struck by lightning while en route. The females, ages 22, 18, and 12 approached a park official and said notified the officer of their condition. [Read More]

Awesome Story From the Past: Randi Naughton and Her Breasts Hate Ricky Lamming

We’ve only been posting here at Punching Kitty for about a year and a half, but its not the only time we’ve taken a moment to enjoy how amazingly weird St. Louis really is. Take for instance this story about Fox 2 anchor Randi Naughton and her admirer Ricky Lamming which we originally wrote for Hell Yeah Bitch! .com. We recently ran across this old story and well, consider this a Punching Kitty prequel. [Read More]

You Know Those St. Louis Summers…

Watch out folks. Gonna be hotter than hell on Monday.

Kinda hope this is true. We’d get some odd satisfaction of watching each station’s weather person go crazy over the now destroyed all time high temperature record in May…and right before they pitch it back to sports, they burst in to flames.

via Davbak on Reddit St. Louis