Oh you crazy Illinois people!

Seems like every place in Illinois not named Chicago is like one big nasty strip club fight.  Take this classy, might be about to cry or laugh, I’m not sure, lady on the right here.  She said to herself:

“Brain, I really want to bash this other broad on the head. But what can I use…hmm…what. can. I. use.  What is readily available in a bar that I can use to bludgeon someone…hello!  Mug!  Ha. Figures, right under my nose!  Well anyway, I got to go try to kill this lovely lady but when I get back brain I’m going to continue to kill you with cheap beer and meth.”