Nazi Zombies May or May Not Have Attacked Chesterfield Over the Weekend

 Posted on June 25, 2012  |  The Editor

As you can see from the picture above, a road sign in Chesterfield was set to display the message: “NAZI ZOMBIES! RUN!!!” over the weekend, which is either pretty funny, or a warning you’d end up wishing was in more places than just this one road sign. “Nazi Zombies! Run!!!” was programmed into a digital traffic sign at Clarkson and Kehrs Mill roads in Chesterfield over the weekend. Police said “Nazi Zombies! [Read More]
chesterfield  missouri  zombie 

Highlights From the St. Charles County Incident Report

 Posted on June 19, 2012  |  The Editor

Sometimes it feels like all we do is cover stories about crime in the city and in the Metro East…which is probably because we do, and probably because there’s lots of it. Like “Aretha Franklin boob skin” a lot. While we love being arbitrarily unfair at times, we do like being fair most of the time and so it’s far past time for us to flip through the St. Charles County “Incident Report” that the Post Dispatch puts together for probably the very same reason. [Read More]
missouri  st. charles county 

Guy Gets Saved and Then Arrested for Assault

 Posted on June 19, 2012  |  The Editor

Elijah Wisniewski was rescued from a burning home Thursday after a police officer saw the flames and ran in to the home to save him. Quite a feel good story huh? Nothing like a cop coming the rescue of a man in trouble! …and if this happened anywhere other than the St. Louis area, the story probably would have ended right there, but instead this happened: The St. Louis Post-Dispatch reports that 31-year-old Elijah Wisniewski of Winfield was charged Monday. [Read More]
assault  fire  missouri  winfield 

Kirkwood Was Totally Racist a Long Time Ago

 Posted on June 13, 2012  |  The Editor

Newsflash: Everyone was really really racist a while back. We know, you’re totally shocked. Who would have thought the residents of an area that was worked by slaves would be racist, but it’s true. Here’s the proof: A viewer alerted News 4 of an old covenant in the Osage Hills neighborhood. After an investigation, it was revealed that a 1926 agreement between the original neighbors blocked certain races from occupying homes. [Read More]
kirkwood  missouri  racism 

Pevely Missouri Doesn’t Give a Crap About Your Teeth

 Posted on June 12, 2012  |  The Editor

Like most towns Pevely, Missouri is hard up for cash, but unlike most towns they’ve decided the best way to save some money is to take away a time tested, doctor approved health benefit: putting fluoride in the water. Many communities add fluoride to the water system to help prevent tooth decay. But Pevely says it just doesn’t have the money anymore. “…so screw you Pevely teeth! It’s fine. No one’s going to notice your crappy teeth in southern Missouri, and it’s not like putting fluoride in the city’s water supply works really well or anything. [Read More]
dentist  missouri  pevely  teeth 

Someone Was Making Meth in the South County Walmart

 Posted on June 8, 2012  |  The Editor

So maybe we’re the only one, but we just figured that all Walmarts were cleared at night to sweep for meth labs. Maybe not though, because the South County Walmart was cleared out last night for that very reason and everyone’s all surprised. A customer cooking a so-called “one pot” batch of methamphetamine inside a pop bottle in her purse caused the Thursday night evacuation of the South County Walmart store. [Read More]
meth  missouri  south county  walmart 

KMOV Reporter Watches Grass Grow in O’Fallon

 Posted on June 6, 2012  |  The Editor

KMOV’s Brian Feldman, digging deep: The current ordinance says on lots less than two acres, grass cannot exceed eight inches. But on some commercial lots, it may be getting longer than that. The city council of O’Fallon is going to take a look at making the restrictions much tighter. In our mind’s eye, Feldman did this interview while wearing one of those little brown fedoras with a press pass tucked in to the band while scribbling away on a little note pad. [Read More]
brian feldman  kmov  missouri  ofallon 

(Updated) Naked O’Fallon Man Bit a Police Officer’s Face

 Posted on April 19, 2012  |  The Editor

Update from 11:30am below. A 21 year-old O’Fallon man has been arrested after doing the following: Beating a 29-year old woman with a “medieval weapon” Being naked in public. Living in a trailer park.* Trying to reach for an officer’s gun. Actually stealing the officer’s stun gun. Hitting the officer with the stun gun. Most likely grazing someone with his junk while all this naked movement was happening. 8. Bitting the officer in the face. [Read More]
assault  missouri  ofallon 

O’Fallon Man Got Busted For Being Internet Perv

 Posted on December 12, 2011  |  The Editor

Robert Stevens, a 34 year old man from O’Fallon, Missouri, was charged with five counts of being a total perv after exposing himself to teenage girls on the internet. A St. Charles Sheriff’s Department detective wrote in court documents that in September, Stevens opened five separate user accounts on the social networking site myYearbook. The website captured the images of Stevens exposing himself and notified authorities. The default settings to communicate via webcam to other users was set so that Stevens could communicate with 13 to 17-year-old girls, the detective wrote. [Read More]
missouri  myyearbook  ofallon  pervert 

Jay Leno Still Isn’t Funny

 Posted on February 16, 2011  |  The Editor

We hear tall tales that at one point in Tonight Show host, Jay Leno’s life, he was a comedian. That seems pretty far fetched, especially since old people told us that and they’re always liars, making up crap like slavery to impress us. Whatever. Anyway, the point is, Jay Leno is certainly not funny now and he shows anyone who cares to watch, 5 nights a week. Last night he took a “shot” at Missouri and one Senator’s attempt to get those little children fingers back out there, doing important work for America by allowing children under 14 to work and stopping future child labor inspections and removing children work time limits. [Read More]
child labor  jay leno  missouri  senate