Unlike our now beloved 3 – 2 Rams, Kansas City is having a hard time with their football team, the Chiefs. They aren’t good, and the fans think it would be better if the team ditched their current starting quarterback, Matt Cassel, in favor of the backup, Brady Quinn, so when the Chiefs game started Sunday and everyone saw Cassel out there against the heavy favorited Ravens, they weren’t pleased. Outside of a win (not gonna happen) we wonder what could cheer a stadium full of hate-filled Chiefs fans up?

Everyone has that crazy cousin right? Well not like these Kansas City folks who probably won’t be inviting their Kentucky cousin back to Kansas City for the holidays after he did some wild stuff. Now sure, this kinda thing might sound pretty reasonable for people in Kentucky, but ’round these parts (yes, even Kansas City), it’s pretty “weird” alright. By “weird’ we mean “molester-ish”. Oh, and by “molester-ish” we mean “seriously 100% messed up and totally molester-y”…seriously.

Think you’re pretty awesome now don’t you Kansas City, luring Google’s promise of awesome internet service away from us. Well pat yourselves on the back now because once Google realizes all your internet traffic consists of is people watching YouTube videos of guys getting hit in the balls and posting “Maybe we can sign Pujols!” on Royals message boards, they’ll wish they would have came to the other side of the state first!

After getting killed 10-3 in the last game of the three-game set in Kansas City over the weekend, one could say the Cardinals officially crapped themselves in Kansas City.

That’s ok though. Kansas City Royals Hall of Famer George Brett says you’re good for one of those at least twice a year.

Editor’s Note: NSFW audio…by which I mean, just put on headphones. We’ll tell  you if the boss is coming.

Kansas City, St. Louis’ little annoying sibling, just has to do everything we do. First we were like “It would be awesome if our football team was really terrible.” and then Kansas City thought that was awesome, so now the Chiefs suck, and now after our All-Star game last year Kansas City wants one of those too.

Commissioner Bud Selig will be in Kansas City on Wednesday to formally award the 2012 All-Star Game to the Royals and Kauffman Stadium. […] The announcement was delayed as details — such as available hotel rooms — were worked out.

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Nothing like a bet no one knows or cares about with a city we are clearly better than on a field of play that probably ranks in the top 10 most boring bets of all time to get a city of people excited about something!

In an effort to get Missourians excited about the 2010 Census, Mayor Slay and Kansas City Mayor Mark Funkhouser have agreed on a friendly competition to see which City improves its Census mail-in response by the highest percentage from 2000-2010.

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St. Louis is #3 on the most dangerous American cities list…again. Old news. We are always on there. We’re like that kid that wears the leather jacket no matter how hot it gets and uses a switch blade comb. We’re bad ass. We know it.

Well, I guess not everyone knows it. (Watch out people at work, this dude is loud!)

At the end of his little tirade, he shows the whole list. Note that if you think you are just having a stroke because you can’t seem to lock in and read the list very well, don’t worry. Its just because this genius though the best way to display the list is with black text on a bright red background…that blinks.

You know that girlfriend you had in highschool that wasn’t bad at the time but looking back she was actually kinda chubs, but it doesn’t really matter because you were kinda chubs too, but in college you slimmed down and ended up with a pretty hot new girlfriend and you would always go home and see your old girlfriend because you are her were still cool and then one day she was like “Hey can you come to this thing?” and you were like, “I’ll try but I have to do this stuff for my hot wife.” and then you didn’t show because you had other important things to do and you were just really being nice by saying you would try, but then the old girlfriend was all like “You suck.” and you were all like “Umm, why are you so pissed?” and she was like “I don’t know why I ever liked you, you are a jerk…just kidding I love you.” and then you were like “You’re crazy” and then got mad and was all “Nevermind I hate you and I with I would have never done that thing  you like with my thumbs, your right ear and that piece of salmon.” and then you’re like, “Ok, bye” and then she’s like “I’ve always loved you! Why did you leave me” and then you’re like “Um you had your chance” and then she’s like “You got me pregnant” so then you sent a dude over to abort that crap but then you realized that you last dated her 10 years ago so it would be less like abortion and more like child murder which was way more expensive so  you call it off but it turns out that she was lying and just started dating your friend so then you are like “Stop calling me”?

The name Moriarty used to mean something.  It used to mean a kick ass, genius villain and nemisis of Sherlock Holmes, but in Kansas City Judge Moriarty is trying his damnedest to make that name mean “creepy guy that touches himself at work”

A district court judge appeared to be masturbating and used foul language during a divorce mediation, an attorney claims in Federal Court.

Kimberly Ireland claims that while mediating, Judge Kevin P. Moriarty tried to discuss her underwear and her sex life, though neither was relevant to the divorce matter. And she claims that “Moriarty appeared to be masturbating during the mediation.”

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Throughout our extensive years of research done in the field of TV, specifically the sitcom, we have noticed a trend.  On average, sitcoms seems to be based in the following locations: New York, Chicago, Southern California, or the New England area.

When we were little, sitting way too close to the TV on Friday nights for TGIF we longed for the one goofy but loving family to be in St. Louis is us!  No, the occasional random location like Step by Step‘s Port Washington, Wisconsin or Family Ties‘ Columbus, Ohio settings, we wanted St. Louis (or at least Missouri)!

Well believe it our not there have been a few actual sitcoms based in St. Louis!  Here’s the ones we could find with a little info and followed by their introductions:

1. “AfterMASH” 1983-1985

Based in Hannibal, Missouri, it was a spin-off from the hit show MASH, the show was about three of the original MASH characters (Colonel Potter, Klinger and Father Mulcahy) dealing with the hilarity of life after war!

With great plot line like Klinger decorating Colonel Potter’s office to look like it did in Korea, or Klinger escaping from jail to attend the birth of his child and then faking insanity to prevent going back to jail, you can pretty much assume this show was a ratings giant…you would be wrong however. It managed 2 seasons and 31 episodes (though the 31st episode never aired) until finally getting canceled after losing a rating battle with the A-Team.

Here’s their Season 2 theme/intro:

2. “The John Larroquette Show” 1993-1996

Based in St. Louis at a fictitious bus depot, John Hemingway (played by John Larroquette) [Editor’s Note: When actors get older they always play characters that have the same first name as they do.  Do older actors just not like getting called by a fake name or what?] who manages said bus depot while having fun with the wacky people that work there and hang around.  The cast of characters really set the tone for how awesome St. Louis is.  Take for instance Pat, the prostitute in drag and the fact that Hemingway himself got the lovely job in St. Louis only because he was a drunk that lost everything.

Canceled a month in to its fourth season, the show was barely recognizable after many major changes to “lighten up” the darker parts of the comedy.