Good news Cardinals fans!  Maybe you didn’t win the drawing for the chance to buy Cardinal playoff tickets, but like all good crooked business deals, there is a back door!  That’s right, just grease that outstretched Cardinal wing and all of a sudden the tight grip on 2009 playoff tickets might just loosen a bit.

Here is what you got on your inbox if  you didn’t “win” the chance to buy tickets and thus are right for the extorting:

Last week we broke the story that Cardinals pitching coach is a pussy, and now we get more information on the status of the amazing amounts of sand stuck in Dunc’s vagina from STLToday’s Joe Strauss.

A lot of this story is stuff we already knew and talked about in our last article, but Strauss does drop some new info like when Dave threw a hissy fit in the clubhouse after the Cardinals traded his son to the Boston Red Sox.

It pains us, it really does, but as the evidence mounts, we have no choice but to stamp long-time Cardinals pitching coach with the dreaded “pussy” label and last we checked there’s still no crying in baseball.

Lets quickly recount the ways…

1. Its one thing to get pissed a little when people rag on your son, its another thing when your son is a major leaguer, and its a whole different thing when your son is a poor major leaguer and is still up here only because he’s clearly given leeway that other players that aren’t related to the pitching coach get.

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After trading away pretty much all of their top-end young talent in deals for Mark DeRosa and Matt Holiday, the Cardinals needed to sign #1 pick, and hard-throwing Texas right-hander Shelby Miller.

Miller suddenly becomes the number one best pitching prospect in the Cardinals farm system.

After initially asking for 4 million to sign, Miller and the Cards settled in on 2.875 Million.  Still a lot of money, but a lot better for the Cards than 4 mill!

It’s true, and we have to agree:  The Sunday Cardinal games aired on KSDK (channel 5) are easily the worst out of the four broadcast entities that air Cardinals games.  (The other three being, Fox, ESPN and of course Fox Sports Midwest)

A quick Twitter scan on the subject quickly returned thoughts like these:

I wouldn’t be upset if they moved all their games to cable like the Blues.

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According to MLB.com, Rolen is unlikely to see action during the upcoming Reds series versus the Cardinals this week.

Reds third baseman Scott Rolen will likely miss at least three more games due to the presence of post-concussion symptoms.

Following the team’s 5-2 win Sunday against the San Francisco Giants, head athletic trainer Mark Mann told reporters Rolen wouldn’t engage in any strenuous physical activity until his symptoms (including an inability to focus) subside.

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We love ourselves some Pujols out here and the world knows it, but from time to time its good to see someone else on the team to get a little of the spotlight.  From our extensive research, we’ve found that if St. Louis had to pick a second favorite Cardinal, most would say the same guy: Yadier Molina

Guess who got the next cover of ESPN the magazine and is sporting a pretty bad-ass catcher pose?!

Just a few links on the news of the Cardinals trade for Matt Holiday:

MLBTradeRumors.com: Cardinals Acquire Matt Holliday

Cardinals Daspora: BREAKING: Matt Holliday Traded To Cardinals!

ESPN.com: Sources: Holliday deal is done

Viva El Birdos: Cardinals Acquire Matt Holliday in exchange for Brett Wallace, Clay Mortensen, Shane Peterson

MLBlogs: Cardinals Acquire Holliday

If I’m missing some, add it in the comments!

If you aren’t pumped about the Cardinals, you are gonna be after you want this!

What’s better than low-res photos of Cardinals cut together over a Creed song?  Nothing.  Well except for a half-and-half from Simone.

The question now becomes, is this guy going to recut this with Lugo in place of Duncan?

Chris Duncan is now being packed in bubble-wrap and being shipped to Boston, who then won’t even open the package, but instead ship him to their AAA club in Pawtucket.  Duncan’s tenure in St. Louis has been one the most rollercoaster-esque rides we have seen a player be on in a long time.  The fans cheered, the fans grumbled, then cheered, then grumbled again, then cheered again, then booed, then went freaking crazy and then he was gone.