PUNCHING KITTY: 2009 - 2013

Punching Kitty was a writing project for the city of St. Louis to have a little fun and try to get everyone to stop taking themselves so seriously…and hopefully highlight some critical issues along the way. Not everyone liked it (it turns out people don’t love being made fun of) but we converted a lot of people and I take pride that the site was truly well read. From the local media, to area police departments, Punching Kitty truly became a source for news and entertainment for St. Louis.

We had a lot of fun, but all good things need an ending and ours was on March 13th, 2013. When we closed up shop the news made local radio, TV, and even the front page of STLToday (The St. Louis Post Dispatch’s website) where we were the top story over a new pope being named. Wild stuff.

While we will no longer actively write, the site will stay up as an archive for St. Louis.

- The Editor

We Know the Reason For the Crappy Start of Franklin and Pujols

 Posted on April 13, 2011  |  The Editor

11 games in to the Cardinals 2010 season and for two prominent Cardinal members we have the following lines: Ryan Franklin: 9.82 ERA, 1 Save, 4 Earned Runs in 3.2 innings Albert Pujols: .182 Average, 1 HR, 4 RBIs, in 44 at bats It’s early of course, but these ugly starts have been over-analyzed already by every sports talking head both in and out of town, but they’re all wrong. Who has the real answer? [Read More]
albert pujols  baseball  cardinals  ryan franklin 

KMOV.com Posts Dumb Comments About the Price of Gas

 Posted on April 12, 2011  |  The Editor

KMOV is really just finding out about this whole internet thing and as such, are now taking posts to paste in comments from the site. You know how you’re always saying “I wonder what the random, nothing to do, loser who just spouts the same colloquialisms about every perceived obstacle in their life thinks about this news item”? You’re prayers have been answered! Gas hit $4 a gallon in the area recently, here’s the user content KMOV wanted to highlight (with our responses/translations): [Read More]
comments  gas  kmov 

Gary Sinise Was in St. Louis Yesterday

 Posted on April 12, 2011  |  The Editor

Actor Gary Sinise, best known for being the other guy in a bunch of really good Tom Hanks movies, was in St. Louis Monday to talk about his upcoming concert at the Family Arena and how it’s proceeds will go to a good cause: He made the official announcement that his band, named the “Lt. Dan Band” after his character in that 1994 film, will play a Memorial Day weekend concert on May 27th at the St. [Read More]
celebrity  charity  gary sinise  veterans 

There’s One Less Thing to Crush Up and Snort Legally in St. Charles County

 Posted on April 12, 2011  |  The Editor

The St. Charles County Council, which sounds like an awesome collection of warriors, but in reality is a boring collection of old white people clothed in over-priced sweaters, voted in to law a ban of certain bath salt items and more variants of the K2 “fake pot” because kids are getting high off to them. Spray paint and gas would have been outlawed too, but they dodged the ban bullet this time because “the council” needs those items this weekend to repaint their shed and drive to Old Country Buffet as it is their main source of food. [Read More]
bath salts  Health  st. charles county 

We’ll Be Back Tomorrow

 Posted on April 11, 2011  |  The Editor

Sorry folks. We’ve been doing a bit of running around last night and today, so instead of just giving you a crappy, hurriedly written post, we’ll just get back at it tomorrow with a few little less crappy and hurriedly written posts.

As usual, apologies are accompanied by something like a little baby kitten clutching a little teddy bear:

Photo Credit: Cute Overload

Lady Sues City Over Trash Charge

 Posted on April 8, 2011  |  The Editor

Annie Cooper is 70 and when you make it to that age, it is your job to shit on everyone that hasn’t made it there by being as grumpy and annoying as possible, always finding a way to make every little thing in to a slight against you personally. That’s gotta be a great feeling, and we can’t wait until we graduate to that lofty position. Back to Annie though, she’s mad because the city is charging her $11/month more for trash pickup and the addition of recycling dumpsters. [Read More]
lawsuit  recycle  trash 

State Auditor: University City is Run By Morons

 Posted on April 8, 2011  |  The Editor

According to the Missouri State Auditor, University City is run by a bunch of raving idiots that probably can’t even wipe their asses correctly, but he can’t verify that since it’s technically outside of the State Auditor’s prescribed duties. Missouri State Auditor Tom Schweich released an audit Thursday highly critical of how University City operates and spends tax payer dollars. …the city has 3,373 delinquent trash accounts costing the city $1. [Read More]
budget  government  morons  university city 

Prentice Nash: Duck-Faced Killa

 Posted on April 7, 2011  |  The Editor

Prentice Nash was arrested for the fatal shooting of Wade Finch in a crime that if you closed your eyes and just heard the names you’d swear it was two chubby, rich white kids in sweater vests fighting over a Faberge egg. Investigators believe Nash, whose home is in the 6600 block of Mignon, about a half-mile from the scene, killed Finch during a robbery attempt. Nash is charged with 2nd degree murder, first degree robbery and armed criminal action. [Read More]
mugshot  shooting 

2011 Season, Game 5: Tony LaRussa Gets Mad at Reporters, Walks Out

 Posted on April 7, 2011  |  The Editor

When Cardinals manager Tony LaRussa announced that he would return as the St. Louis skipper in 2011, he made the following comment: You start thinking about goals. I came up with some goals, very specific ones. One of my goals is to have the media feel like I’m more loveable. Tony was joking. Like really joking it turned out. 5 days in to the 2011 he’s already pulled the “storm out of the press conference bit”. [Read More]
bj rains  cardinals  tony larussa 

O’Fallon Police Finger the Fingerer Named Finger For Child Molestation

 Posted on April 6, 2011  |  The Editor

O’Fallon, MO police have taken Robert Finger in to custody and charged him with two counts of statutory sodomy and one count of attempted child molestation. …and yeah, this (alleged) child molester’s name is Finger. Also, that picture on the right isn’t a sketch we made of what the classic molester guy looks like, that’s Mr. Finger himself. …oh and one more little thing: Prosecutors said Finger had a prior sex offense in Tennessee but had not registered as a sex offender in Missouri despite living here for about four years. [Read More]
finger  molester  ofallon