PUNCHING KITTY

We loved this little note from the Globe Democrat last night:

St. Louis Metropolitan police said officers may have stopped several suspects from stealing a vehicle at Dr. Martin Luther King Drive and Jefferson Avenue Tuesday night.

Hey, well allright! Really nice work. Of course there were apparently “several” people stealing a single car so that had to stand out some way right. I mean if you see 5 people wailing away on a car, you think, as an officer of the law, you might say “Hey, why are you doing that?” and then apparently like in all good action movies the felons flipped out, making it obvious their intentions and possibly opened fire!

Its Easter and things are rising all over the place, except for a part of one James Grady, and if we’re lucky, it will be chemically unable to rise ever again.

Father James Grady pled guilty to possessing child pornography Wednesday morning.

The St. Louis area priest (yup priest) was busted last summer when Grady was asked if he had any kiddie porn on his church purchased laptop and he said “No, I’ve just looked at it. I don’t have any downloaded.” to which the cops pretty much replied “Dude. There is some right there.” It was probably his wallpaper or something. People that are bad at computers always set weird crap as their wallpaper and then don’t know how to change it.

From time to time we post a kitty video.  You won’t admit it to your friends, but you like it when we do this.

Missouri Senator Claire McCaskill was the guest on Comedy Central’s Colbert Report recently and she spent her time rocking the standard Sentate-issued string of pearls while spouting verbal pearls like

You know what I got for Missouri? …I hope? Affordable, accessible insurance for everyone who wants it.

Very safe Senator.  Well played.  You forgot “Go America!” and “What are you hoosier complaining about? Now you can shoot yourself and get fixed up on the house!” but other than that, nicely done.

Other than that she played along with Colbert’s schtick…well you know what? We can’t tell if she’s playing along or not actually, but she did finally get Colbert to stop calling our state “Missou-rah” so it all evens out. …or should we say, sliding to the middle.

Well played indeed Senator.

As a congratulatory note, Punching Kitty has paid for a coffin full of flowers and candy to be delivered to the Senator’s home later today.  Now that we think about it, we hope doesn’t get the wrong idea about our gift.  We were going to call her ahead of time and say “Break a leg!” but we were worried about her taking us too seriously and then reaching in to our pockets for money so she could get herself fixed up.

See the whole interview after the jump!

Baseball is nearly upon us and that means new Cardinal commercials.  We have done our homework and watched each and every one, linked them below, and have a few quick facts as well.

1. We don’t know why exactly the Cardinals need commercials, but we’re glad they still make them.

2. Ok, so  you don’t put in the newly acquired Matt Holiday, but you do put in Fredbird. Twice. Update: We stand corrected. There is a Holiday spot, but its not funny and thus we don’t think it counts.

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We ran across this the other day and just had to share…

St. Louis’ own sports talkin’ prodigy Joe Buck’s HBO show has been cancelled, which is quite a statement if you can’t even get people that pay for the privilege to get the network to watch your show.

Buck’s show kind of got rating when Artie Lange of the Howard Stern Show and Dirty Work (the greatest movie ever made) made the first episode about as awkward as walking in on your mom going at it with some guy you went to high school with…and then Artie Lange comes in.

A district court judge dealt another a blow to the right to paint a giant sign on your house to inform people driving on the highway about whatever you don’t like, be it Eminent Domain or women that use their teeth.

A district court judge upheld a ruling that said a St. Louis man could not display a giant mural protesting eminent domain.

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Signs!  That’s the ticket…the fix to all our troubles! More signs!

That’s pretty much the reaction of the city when finally pushed to do something about the amazing traffic jams that surround Forest Park every time its nice and above 60 degrees.

After last week’s park congestion, Forest Park, the Missouri Department of Transportation, St. Louis City Streets Department, St. Louis Metropolitan Police Department and the park institutions met to work out a plan to improve traffic flow in Forest Park.

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We aren’t sure if this is the first truly “all-male” roller derby team, or if it’s simply the first team to not bother to tuck it back, but its making news all the same.

St. Louis now sports two roller derby teams, one of women, the famed Arch Rivals, and now the GateKeepers. Oh and in case you slipped and fell, hitting your head in your shower this morning…15 times, the GateKeepers coach wants to explain to you what the team name came from.