PUNCHING KITTY: 2009 - 2013

Punching Kitty was a writing project for the city of St. Louis to have a little fun and try to get everyone to stop taking themselves so seriously…and hopefully highlight some critical issues along the way. Not everyone liked it (it turns out people don’t love being made fun of) but we converted a lot of people and I take pride that the site was truly well read. From the local media, to area police departments, Punching Kitty truly became a source for news and entertainment for St. Louis.

We had a lot of fun, but all good things need an ending and ours was on March 13th, 2013. When we closed up shop the news made local radio, TV, and even the front page of STLToday (The St. Louis Post Dispatch’s website) where we were the top story over a new pope being named. Wild stuff.

While we will no longer actively write, the site will stay up as an archive for St. Louis.

- The Editor

Morons in the Humidity: A Busch Stadium Safari

As we said earlier today, we went to the ballgame last night…and unlike most times, we brought our camera! We have a few great clear shots of some particular Busch Stadium species we all know and love (to hate).

First up is Ithinkimcool forsomereason-us which is latin for “smug douche”. This guy decides its in his best interest to ruin other people’s fun at the game because he’s sad for some reason deep down inside. This particular creatures technique from last night was to wait until a single guy comes down to take a photo of the field, with play currently stopped, to yell “Can’t see!” I can’t stress enough that not only was nothing going on, but there had literally been upwards of 50 people crowding around this area at one point or another throughout the night, including times during play. The single guy just trying to take some fun, up-close shots in between innings? Yeah, that’s ruining your fun. Can’t have that.

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Science Explains Why East St. Louis Sucks Giant Zoo Elephant Butt

We all know East St. Louis sucks. Really sucks. Like, “Why can’t  you just call yourself ‘West Chicago’?” sucks. But do you know why? Not just the shootings and the hookers, but why there are shootings and hooker? …and why most eastern parts of other towns suck the same way, albeit, much less?

Take it away science!

The reason for this is that in much of the northern hemisphere, the prevailing winds are westerlies – blowing from west to east. The massive, unchecked pollution from these early industries would therefore drift eastward, making the air quality much lower in the east end of cities, lowering the desirability (and price) of the housing. Middle classes preferred the cleaner west ends.

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Aaron Miles Isn’t Good at Baseball

We took a moment in our busy schedule to take in a ball game last night and were reminded that though St. Louis may be considered baseball’s “best” town, that doesn’t really mean we know the most about baseball.

Imagine our fortune that we landed on the very game that Aaron Miles makes it back to the Cardinals, fresh from double-A Springfield. Pushing down poor Allen Craig who got to smell the sweet air of the Show just long enough to wonder if it was all just a dream. Sorry Allen. You have upside and we are all just about the imagined greatness of yet another little scrappy white guy in St. Louis. You’re best bet? Hack 6 inches off yourself, strike out a ton, and play horrible defense…oh, but run really hard when you do get a walk 4 times a year. We love that.

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Three Chicks Got Hit By Lightning

“Hey its storming. Lets go to the park!”

“Ow.”

“Did we just get hit by lightning?”

“I think so.”

“We should tell someone.”

“Ok. How about a park ranger?”

“Sounds good to me.”

“I’m going to sit down.”

As storms rolled through the area Monday, three females on their way to St. Vincent County Park said they believed they were struck by lightning while en route.

The females, ages 22, 18, and 12 approached a park official and said notified the officer of their condition. When paramedics arrived on scene, the females were on the ground.

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St. Louis Ranks #1 in Something, It’s Best We Don’t Get into Specifics

Begin press release:

To: Everyone

Re: St. Louis ranking #1 in something

According to a recent study by Punching Kitty.com, St. Louis has come out on top, over all the major US metro areas, as the best city for…um…this crazy thing…it’s not really important.

“After pouring through all the data we have concluded that St. Louis finally has a study to hang it’s hat on as it came in the clear number 1 beating out San Francisco, CA, New York City, NY and Bald Knob, AR” said editor Mike Flynn. The list of factors that went in to the decision included:

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Another Study Says it Sucks to Live in St. Louis

So yet another study says it sucks to live in St. Louis. Out of 67 cities, St. Louis came in 40th under the vague “Quality of Life” category.

The study compared the performances of America’s 67 biggest metropolitan areas in 20 statistical categories. The highest scores went to well-rounded markets with healthy economies, moderate costs of living, light traffic, impressive housing stocks and high-powered educational systems. […]

The St. Louis area’s lowest rankings, each at No. 57 in their categories, came for its percentage of workers who walk to work or work from home at 5.1 percent; and self-employment, at 8.4 percent.

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The “Brick by Chance and Fortune” Trailer

The “Brick by Chance and Fortune” Trailer

Taking a break from a full set of posts today because its a holiday and this CSI marathon sure the hell isn’t going to watch itself.

I did want to post up something though, and for your holiday post you get a chance to watch something too. Friend-of-the-site, Bill Streeter has released a trailer for his new documentary “Brink by Chance and Fortune” which is about the lovely brick buildings in St. Louis and the history of that industry and you watch see below.

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Awesome Story From the Past: Randi Naughton and Her Breasts Hate Ricky Lamming

We’ve only been posting here at Punching Kitty for about a year and a half, but its not the only time we’ve taken a moment to enjoy how amazingly weird St. Louis really is. Take for instance this story about Fox 2 anchor Randi Naughton and her admirer Ricky Lamming which we originally wrote for Hell Yeah Bitch! .com. We recently ran across this old story and well, consider this a Punching Kitty prequel.

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Athletica’s Financial Red Card: Women’s Soccer Team Flops

St. Louis’ professional women’s soccer team closed up shop seemingly out of nowhere Thursday.

English brothers Heemal and Sanjeev Vaid, the money men behind both teams, abruptly yanked their backing in recent weeks although contracted to fund the clubs through the 2011 season.

Athletica players were told Thursday that will be on their own as free agents effective June 1.

Be honest. How many of you reading this even knew this team existed? 40? 4? It doesn’t matter. It’s the United States, soccer teams fold. It’s just the way it is here. In fact you can always look to the league as a whole and see how their react to find out if this is really a big deal.

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Random Interview: Jeff Sable

It’s been a little while, but we still do the “Random Interview” here on Punching Kitty. Who better to get it going again than Jeff Sable?

Punching Kitty: Who are you?

Jeff Sable, I sing songs and play guitar in a band called…uh..Sable.

PK: How’s it going?

Busy,  I travel a lot and come back on the weekends to play Fast Eddie’s Bon-Air.  I just got asked to be in the big Nashville CMA Fest Parade, so that’s an honor.  Also got a video going out to CMT and GAC in the next few weeks.  I play about 7 shows a week so that’s good too.

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