KDSK: Where the news comes first! …unless you think an interview about how one lady doesn’t like someone else’s business because it kills the one animal she likes isn’t news. Then just hang tight because after this there’s a few stories about people getting shot and then a long talk about the weather, followed by anchor banter and sports.

Horse meat to eat? Sound unlikely? It could soon be a possibility, as the developers of a horse slaughter plant have set their sights on Missouri.

…and when they get here they’re going to make you eat horses! Here’s some “news coming first”: If you’ve been to a Taco Bell before, eating horse meat is old news for you.

Unified Equine wants to get in the business of horse slaughter for human consumption. A company spokesperson believes Missouri is the perfect place for a plant. But many in the horse community are outraged.

So what? You can find some one to disagree with every business if you look hard enough. It’s especially easy when food is involved. It’s not like you’re just going to give a megaphone to every random nut that has “beef” with someone are you? …oh wait. We forgot, this is KSDK. Lets see where this goes.

Elizabeth Parker’s pastures are full of horses with stories to tell. In past lives, they’ve pulled carriages, been race horses and show ponies.

Her mission and passion is to save the horses that others say aren’t worth saving. So the thought of someone wanting to slaughter horses for food makes her stomach turn.

“It would be as if someone took me to dinner and said my best friend is on the plate,” she said.

Well if you weren’t a weirdo, that would actually be cannibalism, but since all your friends are horses it’s just called the “circle of life” and being a horrible best friend who let her get all the way to your plate before you realized she was gone. Actually, why did you order the horse at this fictitious example restaurant if you’re so in love with them? No, no! None of this adds up at all!

But Parker believes slaughter is still not the answer. She says those horses still deserve a chance.

…because these are the animals she specifically decided were special. If cows could give her the finger, they would.

Horse slaughter isn’t all bad! We hear they hand out free horse mane scalps to kids that want to style and fancy up their bike or house cat. Get there quick before Larry Rice, Fox Sport Midwest’s Jim Haynes and KSDK’s own Frank Cusumano get there and start fighting over the first batch for a new hair hat!

via KSDK