Virginia Kerr, St. Louis’ news sweetheart, after famously tweeting about her sniz during labor, has been on maternity leave from her morning anchor post at KMOV who quickly found a brunette version of Kerr to fill the spot while she’s gone, one Claire Kellett. We have no idea how Claire is doing in her fill-in duties because we don’t get up that early and prefer to get our news from every other place ever, but apparently she’s doing just fine because now Brunette Virginia is in and Blonde Virginia is out.

Claire Kellett, who’s been filling in for Virgina Kerr on “News 4 Awake,” will replace Kerr as co-anchor with John Knicely.

When Kerr returns from maternity leave in January, she’ll co-host “Great Day St. Louis” with Carole Daniel, Matt Chambers and Kent Ehrhardt.

Oh snap! Cute mama Virginia Kerr getting replaced on the “real”-ish news job is bad enough, but for a blonde chick to get replaced by a brunette?! It’s on now! Plus Kerr has to go stink it up with KMOV’s morning show answer to the question no one asked because their either at work, chasing kids around, or doing something with their day. Also, why the hell does Great Day in St. Louis need four hosts? Seems like a lot of people. Do they have enough room around the kitchen cart so they can all say how yummy the cranberry muffins some chef you never heard of just showed you how to make?

“Virginia is a natural for ‘Great Day St. Louis,’ and she is definitely going to be a great addition to the show,” said Liz Mullen, KMOV’s director of programming and production. “We look forward to Virginia sharing her perspective on a variety of lifestyle topics, especially her unique perspective as a brand new mom.”

We gotta stop you right there. “Unique perspective”? How the hell is being a mom in any way unique? Sure it’s different, and an experience, but only to the person who pooped out the kid (Not poop exactly of course, but you know…it does come out of their butt right? Not always we mean…only if it starts off with anal.) not to any of the countless moms out there. Maybe they’re thinking that with a new baby at home she’ll be less likely to kill herself after a few weeks of her telling the five sad fat-asses watching this show while switching back and forth from QVC about how to make the best holiday centerpiece.

Meanwhile in a skull-shaped hillside lair in the heart of West County, Matt Chambers leans back in his giant chair adorned with the skulls of milk carton kids, tapping his fingers together. “Good! Good! All according to plan.”

via Gail Pennington @ STLToday

After being “indefinitely” suspended for all of 4 days, two of them being weekend days he doesn’t work anyway, MSNBC’s Keith Olberman sat his ass back down in his leftist cable pundit throne Tuesday night. Not until the end of his show did Olberman really address his suspecition because of violating a NBC News policy for not previously seeking permission before making private campaign donations.

This clip below is a chunk of his statement on his suspension and subsequent rebirth from a trashcan fire no one was really all that worried about, right after he told everyone he did nothing wrong and right before he played a whole Daily Show segment…

Awwwwww…Olberman gives a little TV hug to St. Louisan Dana Loesch for being cool to him despite the fact that they’re both so different! Even admitting that she was “probably nicer to (him) that (he) would have treated them”. Nice to see a truce happen, even for a moment, with Mrs. Loesch, our town’s little enemy collector. Maybe this will spark a moment of clarity: Are you guys really so different? Crazy is crazy no matter if its for Coco Puffs, holding on to George W jokes way past their expiration date or tax cuts for super rich people. Can’t you see you love each other?!

Olberman also dropped this lovely technique in we just had to point out:

“I like to name all of the 300,ooo signatories to that petition, but obviously I can’t, and anyway 99% were my relatives!”

LOL! ROFL! PMAL*! Really hilarious stuff. See if he makes this joke about how he had to have a petition filled with people that had to sign it, then he doesn’t look like a giant douche for saying 14 times that there was a petition of 300,000 signatures to get him back on the air.

Bad Self-Deprecation aka The Verbal Jingling of Keys. Well played sir.

* PMAL = Peed Myself A Little

Where can the St. Louis Rams all-time leading rusher go to talk about the lack or Rams receivers, a possible NFL lockout and how great his hair is, all while looking like he’s getting his senior photo taken? Versus T. Ocho show!

The awkward show, hosted by…um…it doesn’t matter, with controversial Cincinnati wide receivers Terrell Owens and Chad Ocho Cinco on a big screen, has a weekly guest that the two receivers mumble questions at while the host tries to save the show and try not to catch a look at himself in something reflective and have an instant suicidal reaction to where he career has lead him.

On how T.O. was nearly a Ram this past offseason:

Owens: “I was like…litterally 24 hours away from being in St. Louis and this T. Ocho wouldn’t be possible right now.

Jackson: No it wouldn’t man. You know. We would have been a good tag-team, bro, you know. You wouldn’t have to fight for catches around here, I’ll tell you that.

[Awkward laughing]

On the differences in the show if Jackson was one of the hosts:

Jackson: It seems that you are lacking some style, some hair. I would bring a whole different angle from it.

On the possibility of an NFL lockout next year:

Jackson: Well the lockout is definitely possible. It’s something we need to be conscious about and we tell the young kids to save their money and be prepared for a lockout.

Interesting, but stupid…just like Terrell Owens himself. The important thing is that none of that stupid transfered to our boy SJ39. You’re cool, right Steve?!

Well, crap.

(Full video after the jump!)

via Saturday’s Bernie Bits

(more…)

Could retired Arizona Cardinals quarterback and St. Louis demi-god, Kurt Warner, is rumored to be in the next set of has-beens/trying-to-bes on the ABC show Dancing With the Stars.

Kurt Warner, formerly of Arizona and St. Louis, who is reportedly under consideration for the fall season of DWTS. So reports Lisa de Moraes, the Washington Post’s television columnist from the annual summer critics tour.

While DWTS has previously hosted running backs (Emmitt Smith), wide receivers (Jerry Rice) and defensive linemen (Warren Sapp) , Warner would be the first quarterback to be a contestant on the show.

This news is of course just a big giant, gift wrapped, wet dream to the St. Louis Warner faithful and of course KDNL (ABC 30) who gets a ratings windfall by showing Kurt Warner dancing like a moron with some hot chick that he will undoubtedly require a balloon to be in-between them while dancing to prohibit any un-pure “reactions”.

Prediction: Warner will lose, but frankly that’s the way to go. Show up, do a few moves and get the hell out of there before whatever happened to NFL legend Jerry Rice happens to you:

via Fanhouse

We know what you are thinking: “Gosh I wish there were more shows about football on, and specifically shows about the worst team in the league.”

Well buddy, we have a surprise for you!

KSDK-TV said Tuesday that it will launch a new, half-hour Sunday morning sports program in September as part of a new agreement with the St. Louis Rams.

Tentatively titled “Rams Tailgate,” the magazine-type program will showcase the lives of Rams players and coaches both on and off the field, the television station said, and “go beyond the traditional X’s and O’s of typical football pregame programs.”

See the marketing magic here is telling everyone it won’t be the same football show and then just make what we all know they will make: 30 minutes of Frank Cusumano blathering on about how excite Mike Martz was.

The need for this show arrived when KSDK realized that once the Cardinal’s season was over they had no way to interrupt good sports coverage with the crappiest sports coverage as possible just long enough to ruin the sporting event you can only watch on their station.

Well played.

via St. Louis Business Journal

The show many, including all of us at Punching Kitty headquarters, have been dissecting and mulling over for six awesome years finally came to a close Sunday night in a tense and dare we say, tear educing ending. Then, just as the show faded to black with that familiar Lost white lettering, while you were just taking that deep breath and turning to the person next to you on the couch to talk about it St. Louis Lost fans heard a familiar but out-of-place theme song ramp up: The Simpsons.

Confused? You weren’t the only one.

Although reactions varied on Twitter, confusion reigned.  Allow your buddy Punching Kitty to shine some light on things.

You see ABC is a big network and has lots of good solid affiliates all around the country, affiliates that will gladly show Lost as long as they have a break before showing the Jimmy Kimmel after-show special. St. Louis isn’t one of them though. KDNL, the St. Louis ABC affiliate, canned it’s local news long ago…and what is a local affiliate with no local news to show in the 25 minutes between one of the most epic finale’s of all time and the after show talking about one of the greatest finales of all time?

The Simpsons of course!

Do you think that they could have maybe used the time better? Maybe with a local after-show where St. Louisans can respond to the TV event to keep the thrill going until handing off to Kimmel? Nah…they’d rather just show a rerun of a show that made as little sense as possible so that people would be confused and change the channel.

Well played KDNL. [Editor's Note: Come to think of it KDNL, you might not understand sarcasm, so what we really mean is that you are retarded.]