Traffic slowed for east-bound rush hour drivers Monday evening after a truck driver spilled his load all over the place, causing an environmental firm to come up and clean up the mess. If this sounds familiar, it’s probably because a different truck driver did the same thing to your mother last night.

The cargo was described as vaguely as “chicken parts”. Chicken parts that we’re assuming were scraped in to a pile on the road, with each one individually blown on while being held with two fingers…and then thrown back in to the truck. 5 hour rule dude. You’re not going to taste it after a few dunks in that think BBQ sauce packet anyway.

KMOX described the situation thusly…

For most of the evening motorists, East bound on I-70  in North St. Louis had to deal with what may go down as a once in a lifetime event.

Well hold on there skippy. This is hardly a “once in a lifetime event”. Not for this state. Not in this year.

February: Truck Spills 20 Tons of Mayonaise on I-44 Near Springfield

April: Tractor-Trailer Spills Mystery Meat All Over Highway 70 in St. Peters

June: Onions Spilled on Interstate 55 as Missouri’s Truck Spilled Sandwich Nears Completion

As you can see there at the end, we were pretty sure Missouri’s truck drivers were making a giant highway sandwich with the mayo, onions and meat…but “chicken parts”?! Now we’re not so sure. However, we are sure that spilling food or a food like substance in on a Missouri highway or interstate is far from a rare thing this year. Hell, we still have 3 months to go! Lots of time left for some ranch dressing or Easy Cheese spillage to put the finishing touch on this meal.

If anyone has some good recipes that use these ingredients, send them our way!

via KMOX

A tanker truck was rumbling down I-44 Friday night leaking sulfuric acid on to the street which is a problem because it turns out that stuff is bad for you.

Witness say a tractor trailer was leaking fluids while driving down the highway. Officials were notified, and an officer stopped the vehicle around 7:30p.m.

Obviously, emergency crews had to shut down the highway as well as rush the officer who stopped the truck to the hospital after he got sick from inhaling the fumes (he’ll be fine). Soon after, authorities released the truck and he continued on his way down I-44 to on Bourbon where we assume everything turned out just fine.

The tractor trailer that spilled sulfuric acid Friday night on Interstate 44 near Sullivan, Missouri is leaking again – but in a different city.

Officials say the hazardous mineral was found dripping from the truck Saturday morning at a commuter parking lot in Bourbon, Missouri, forcing nearby residents to evacuate the area.

Oh Sullivan cops, we told you sulfuric acid eats right through duct tape, but you said “No! This is the good kind, and if it’s good enough to make my wallet out of it, then it’s good enough for this tanker.”…and then you said “Yup.” and we’re still not sure why.

Since more reports of a sulfuric acid spill have come through, crews moved the tanker to the Bourbon Industrial Park, where an uncertain amount of the chemical will be unloaded.

…and then sold throughout the neighborhood since selling stuff kids can smoke or sniff but will obviously kill them is big business out there.

via KMOV x2

You know that important bill you not going to get? No? Oh, well…it’s on 270 by Dorsett Road. We’re sure it will be fine though, we hear mortgage companies are usually pretty chill on stuff like that.

U.S. Postal Inspector Dan Taylor says the back door of a tractor trailer popped open on Interstate 270 near Dorsett Road in Maryland Heights around 4:30 a.m. Sunday. The truck continued onto Interstate 55 to Ste. Genevieve spilling hundreds of peices of mail along the way.

The mail came from a distribution center in Maryland Heights heading for Memphis, Tennessee. Nevermind, you probably will get your mortgage bill, but any out-going mail may be in jeopardy. Face it though, if you’re still using real mail, then your old and it won’t really matter because you’ve already forgotten you sent it.

Either way, authorities believe that most, if not all, of the mail has been recovered.

A $40 Million dollar government task force has been formed to research the result, if any, of double-checking to see if a mail truck’s back door is latched before driving away will help alleviate this type of mail loss in the future.

via KSDK

Driving down Forest Park Parkway, the “intra-city 40″ and a truck pulls in the lane ahead.

Seems small though. Can’t figure out what’s wrong with this thing, but something is off. Wait a minute…that’s a Ford Escort…that is a Ford Escort truck!  …which aren’t supposed to exist and thus are like a chick with a third boob. You know, like at first you hear about it and you are like “Whoa! Three boobs?! That sounds awesome…and then you get there and after looking at it, its not quite right and makes everything look off because they aren’t lined up horizontally, but the third one is aligned vertically with the right boob making her look like some sort of weird dog girl which isn’t what you were hoping.  …maybe if there were four and she was evened out…no, even then, its just wrong and your dreams and expectations tempered like so many Saved by the Bell-themed wet dreams after watching Showgirls.

Have you ever really needed a truck but only had an old 4-door car? Lets say you did. Now let me ask you this: In that situation, would you think to yourself “Well I’ve got a shit-load of time on my hands! Lets just make a truck out of my Ford Escort!”

No. You wouldn’t think that. This guy did though. Thought it. Did it. …and now he is legend.

More photos after the jump!

(more…)

Who the hell would have thought a 140 year old sewer would collapse when someone drove a semi truck carrying 43,000 pounds worth of scrap metal over it?!

I guess they don’t make them like they did 175 years ago…

Via STLToday.com and I’m sure every single nightly news cast tonight.