“I love Detroit.”

That was former Kansas City Royal, Oakland Athletic, Boston Red Sox, New York Yankee and current Detroit Tiger Johnny Damon yesterday after turning down a chance to be traded back to the Boston Red Sox team he helped bring a World Series Championship to in 2004 after sweeping the Car…ugh. Blockquote to break the painful memory anyone?

The Red Sox claimed Damon on waivers this week, but he had the right to veto a move to Boston because of a no-trade clause in his contract.

“These guys really like me here,” Damon said Tuesday, adding that he spoke to each of his teammates individually to be sure he was wanted in the Tigers’ clubhouse.

Jesus. Everyone knows you’re a liar and just don’t want to go back to Boston because the fans were mean to you while rocking pinstripes. Wanna know why? Because Detroit sucks dude. Totally sucks. As in “worse than St. Louis” sucks. When people visit Detroit they always step on their tip-toes like they are trying to quickly walk through a puddle. Going downtown has got to be like driving around in Grand Theft Auto but with less people on the street to hit.

“I feel like we’re not out of it yet,” he said. “At least we can make some kind of run.”

No Johnny, Detroit is not going to make the playoffs.

Damon said he’d like to play in Detroit next year too, but “there’s no guarantee.”

…that Deroit will even been there next year? First smart thing you’ve said all day. We hear their homeless are nearing completion on their Homeless Deathstar made out of shopping carts, old coats and used condoms. There’s one exhaust duct you can shoot to destroy it, but its all gross and you’d have to get up close. Just give them Detroit.

[Editor's Note: Some posts are actually about St. Louis, while others are about us looking down our nose at shittier cities. It's called variety. You're welcome.]

Photo: Johnny Damon’s Wife. Ah! Now you get it.

via ESPN Boston

According to the Cincinnati Reds’ Twitter feed, they have just acquired former Cardinal Jim Edmonds.

This move continues ex-Cardinal GM Walt Jockety’s quest to rebuild his old Cardinal team in Cincinnati that currently includes Scott Rolen, Jason Isringhausen, Russ Springer and Miguel Cairo.

We hear a waiver deal possibly involving Fred Bird is next, but until then expect an Edmonds appearance later on in the upcoming series vs the Reds.

Update: It’s on ESPN now too.

A few hours before the Major League Baseball trading deadline passed, the Cardinals brass pulled the trigger on a three-team deal that brought back a pitching prospect from the San Diego Padres and veteran starting picture Jake Westbrook from the Cleveland Indians while sending right-fielder Ryan Ludwick to the Padres in return.

Everyone is pissed. Well not everyone…Jake Westbrook is stoked.

“I’m excited to go to a club that’s contending for a playoff spot and pitch in some meaningful ballgames,” Westbrook said. “That’s why you play the game, to get a chance to play in the playoffs and I look forward to doing that.”

Well that’s nice. Good for him. Get really for a cold clammy welcome Jake!

Compared to the views within the walls of Busch Stadium, those fan tweets are nearly cheers.

Asked if he was surprised by the deal, Chris Carpenter waited 12 seconds before responding.

“The loss of Ludwick is something that surprised me,” the ace eventually said. “In turn, you have to give up something to get something. Unfortunately it was Ryan. … I can only speak for myself and not for everybody else. It’s nice to acquire a guy like Westbrook, and it’s hard to lose a guy like Ludwick. There’s no question.”

He paused five seconds.

“It will be interesting to see.”

Cold vibes coming from Carpenter, but the off-the-record Cardinal quotes Joe Strauss got are much better:

Read the rest of this entry »

According to our sources the St. Louis Cardinals have had internal discussions about trading injured so-so shortstop Brendan Ryan to the New York Yankees for All-Star third baseman Alex Rodriguez.

It is not clear whether the Cardinals have brought this idea to the attention of the Yankees. Even if the Yankees were actually to consider this offer it might be a difficult to one to work out as A-Rod is a good contributor and has recently bonded with the New York fans after reclaiming the World Series title in 2009.

We asked a Cardinals’ official about these internal discussions who responded only with “What?! This is completely stupid…wait, how did you get this number?”

Money could be a possible issue on this deal as Rodriguez makes a staggering $27.5 Million dollars a year, but the issue is side-stepped as the Cardinals’ internal discussions involve the Yankees picking up all of the money owned to Rodriguez for some reason. Also the internal discussions involve the Yankees would deliver muffins to the Cardinals on the completion of the deal.

This news may well echo the recent news of the Phillies internal discussions involving a trade of Ryan Howard to the Cardinals for reigning MVP Albert Pujols.  Speaking of that deal, here’s what Buster Onley, the story’s author, had this today in his blog (ESPN Insider required):

About the Howard/Pujols story the other day: What was written was dead-on.

I did not write that there were ongoing discussions between the two teams.
I did not write that the Cardinals had an inclination to deal Pujols.
I did not write that the Phillies are looking to dump Ryan Howard.

Internal discussions are part of the sport. It’s how the Phillies got to the point that they pursued Mike Lowell and Halladay, in spite of their flat denials. I once wrote a story about their serious interest in Lowell, and club executives shot it down as untrue; an assertion that was, in itself, completely untrue.

Internal discussions are how the Cardinals got to the point that they made a deal last summer for Matt Holliday. Quite frankly, if the Phillies’ executives didn’t have those kinds of conversations, they wouldn’t be doing their jobs.

And as a reporter, when you have confirmed information that the Phillies have discussed internally an avenue through which they might pursue the best player in baseball — and you know exactly who said what to whom, and how sturdy the intent was — that is news.

The only difference was, in this case, that the internal conversations were about two superstars. And while it may be inconvenient to some, it’s credible.

Not only that, but Buster was also a guest on 101 ESPN’s Burwell and Someoneelse show. Don’t get shocked now, but Burwell didn’t exactly ask the important questions as much as verbally fellate Olney over the WXOS airwaves. The “interview” consisted of them bashing everyone for not reading the Olney piece and then Burwell saying that he “feels Olney’s pain.”

Look guys, yes there were those that, for some reason, read Olney’s piece and thought a trade was in the works, but I think they are the minority.  The real question is: How is this even news?  Buster himself even says in his reply

Quite frankly, if the Phillies’ executives didn’t have those kinds of conversations, they wouldn’t be doing their jobs.

And I think we can all agree that probably every MLB team at one point or another, has said internally “How the hell do we get Pujols on his team.”  So once again we ask, how the hell is this news?  We usually like Buster Olney, but later this season, please don’t tell us all about the internal discussions the Phillies have about where to go to lunch.

Um, no.

That’s the rumor though according to an ESPN article.  Internal discussions in the Phillies front office have centered on pitching a deal that would trade one team’s MVP first baseman for another.

The logic for a Howard for Pujols swap, as discussed within the Phillies’ organization, could fall along these lines: Pujols, 30 years old, is eligible for free agency after the 2011 season, and early conversations about a contract extension have not led to any long-term deal. The expectation within baseball is that Pujols may ask for a deal that would rival, in annual value, the record-setting 10-year, $275 million deal that Alex Rodriguez negotiated with the Yankees in fall 2007.

If the Cardinals were to decide, at any point, that they could not afford to sign Pujols, they could consider dealing him, in the way the Toronto Blue Jays traded Roy Halladay, or the Minnesota Twins traded Johan Santana.

And Howard, who is just a couple of months older than Pujols, would not be a bad alternative. In the past four seasons, Howard has hit 198 homers and accumulated 572 RBIs, and has finished in the top five of the NL MVP race.

Though we would agree if you are trading Pujols, from a PR perspective, getting local product Ryan Howard back would be about as good as it could get, in that there might be a little less rioting at the gates of Busch Stadium, but here’s why this is a horrible idea that the Cardinals will have nothing to do with: Yes, Howard can hit the long ball, but he strikes out far too much which is in sharp contrast to Pujols’ unheard of power and contact pairing.  Defense is another big issue in this.  Yes, Howard has gotten better, but Pujols is arguably the best defensive first baseman in the National League.

Calm down though, at this time the Phillies are denying any such talks (but what are they supposed to say) and there is no evidence that this idea has been in any way floated to the Cardinals.

We do know this though. If you are even a little annoyed that this is non-news is being discussed, I really wouldn’t turn on any sport talk stations tomorrow, because that’s all they are going to be talking about.  We can hear the confused grunts followed by the “I don’t know. This could work…” sounds coming out of D’Marco Farr now and call after call of freaking out red-necks dotted with a few armchair GMs trying to make this deal work.

I think we just talked ourselves out of ever listening to St. Louis radio sports talk ever again.

From the Globe Democrat:

Despite recent tensions between the U.S. and China, the governor warmly received China’s ambassador to the U.S. at a discussion of a trade partnership marked by little tangible progress.

The two officials are looking to make Lambert Airport in St. Louis the Midwestern hub of air cargo transport between China and the U.S., but did not provide specifics or expand upon previous announcements.

So you’re saying there’s a good chance I might be able to get a straight flight from St. Louis to China, but I have to make two layovers to get to New York?

It was Wil Witherspoon.  Its ok if you’ve never heard of him, and if thats the case you are totally not going to know the guy we got for him, Brandon Gibson, a rookie wide receiver from the Eagles.

Here’s your scouting report from the Rams.  They are psyched.

“Brandon is a young receiver that we have followed since training camp,” Rams GM Billy Devaney said in a statement. “He has good size (6-0 and 210), good hands and had a very productive preseason. His familiarity with our offensive system should help his transition to our team.”

Witherspoon was considered one of the better veterans on the Rams so do you know what this means to the Rams?

Nothing.  Losing is losing.

via Jim Thomas at the Post Dispatch

Just a few links on the news of the Cardinals trade for Matt Holiday:

MLBTradeRumors.com: Cardinals Acquire Matt Holliday

Cardinals Daspora: BREAKING: Matt Holliday Traded To Cardinals!

ESPN.com: Sources: Holliday deal is done

Viva El Birdos: Cardinals Acquire Matt Holliday in exchange for Brett Wallace, Clay Mortensen, Shane Peterson

MLBlogs: Cardinals Acquire Holliday

If I’m missing some, add it in the comments!

Update #4: Trade talk: MLBTradeRumors.com , STLToday.com, Boston Herald.com

Update #3: Trade back on!  In a tweet from Bernie Miklasz: “Cardinals trade C. Duncan for J Lugo …. Cardinals won’t be responsible for Lugo’s big salary;”  Viva El Birdos was right all along!  Nice scoop guys!

Update #2: The optioning of Duncan has been further confirmed by Joe Strauss over Twitter and by  insidestl.com

Update #1: Bernie Miklasz said on 101 ESPN at 11:49pm that Chris Duncan will be optioned to Memphis, saying all player moves are “internal” meaning Julio Lugo is not involved.

Original post follows:

Thats what we are hearing, with the initial report from Viva El Birdos, saying that Duncan was moved to the Red Sox for ousted shortstop Julio Lugo.

Lugo was set to be DFA’d (Designated for Assisgnment) which means they were just going to dump him, so they’ll take anything to make the deal somewhat more palatable like a bag of balls…or a hobbled DH that plays the outfield…

We are working to confirm.

I’ve been meaning to write this up forever…

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