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steroids

Sports

Barry Bonds is Proud of Mark McGwire


Posted by The Editor on 12 Apr 2010 /
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Nothing like two guys that aided in butt-raping the sport of baseball catching up and spreading good cheer via the press.

Barry showed some McGwire love when he (finally) showed up to the 2000 Giants team reunion:

“I have a really good friendship with Mark McGwire. I’m proud of him,” the 45-year-old Bonds, back in the Bay Area for a reunion at AT&T Park of the Giants’ 2000 NL West champion team, said when asked what he thought of McGwire’s January admission. “We’ve had a great relationship throughout our entire lives and throughout our career. I’m proud of what he did. I’m happy for him.”

McGwire heard the news and was all like “Awwww. That’s so nice of him. Remember when we used to talk about steroi…oh right. Still waiting on you to ‘come out’”:

“It’s very cool. Barry is a great player, was a great player in this game, many MVPs,” McGwire said. “The guy could do it all. It makes me feel really good. It’s really cool to be back in the game. … I’m a big boy, I understand that things happen in your life and you’ve got to confront them, and you also have to move on from them and learn from them.”

Still just waiting on you Barry. You let us know when you want to talk and we’ll all pretend like we are shocked and fall out of our chairs. We’re pretty good at it now. “What?! Rosie O’Donnell is gay?! Get out.”, “Wait. Clark Kent and Superman are the same person!?”, “No way! Lindsey Lohan died! Shocked. I’m shocked.” (Put this last one in your pocket).

This is great hearing Bonds and Mac talk it up! They should get the whole team back together…what’s Sammy Sosa up to these days?

Oh yeah, he retired and shrunk down back to his pre-roids weight where he looked like Carlton from Fresh Prince of Bel Air.

via ESPN


Sports

Pujols is Proud of McGwire For Coming Out?!


Posted by The Editor on 20 Jan 2010 /
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Over the last weekend the national media descended on St. Louis for a chance to talk steroids with Tony LaRussa, Albert Pujols and of course Slightly-Less-Big Mac.

Pujols had some really nice supportive things to say about McGwire to the press, but we can’t shake this feeling that Pujols is a little confused about what Mark confessed too exactly…

Maybe not though.  McGwire did seem pretty happy dancing with those “Single Ladies” in that video.


Sports

We Feel Bad for the One Guy that Was Apparently Surprised by the Mark McGwire News


Posted by The Editor on 13 Jan 2010 /
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We here at Punching Kitty headquarters weren’t exactly surprised by Monday’s revelation that former home run champ and current St. Louis Cardinals batting coach Mark McGwire finally came clean, admitting that he did in fact take steroids during his career.

However we can’t say that about everyone.

One South County Cardinals fan apparently fell back against the wall clutching his chest while whispering “dios mio!” to himself like some old Latina woman.  Then he got angry and proceeded to do what angry people do, they go to the internet.

In a Craiglist posting entitled “Old McGwire Newspapers” our man has this to say (screenshot below)

Been holding on to these old Post Dispatch special edition newspapers when [McGwire] broke the home run record. No value now. Maybe you can use them for fire kindling.

You think he’s sad now, just wait until he finds out pro wrestling is fake!


Sports

McGwire to Everyone: “Oh THOSE Steroids! Yeah, I Took Those. Sorry.”


Posted by The Editor on 12 Jan 2010 /
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In a story about as shocking as the day Rosie ODonnell came out of the closet, today St. Louis Cardinals hitting coach and former home run champ Mark McGwire confessed he took steroids during his major league career, including 1998.  Which of course is the year that JD Drew first played major league baseball…oh and he and some crazy black guy hit a bunch of home runs.

McGwire said he also used human growth hormone, and he didn’t know if his use of performance-enhancing drugs contributed to some of the injuries that led to his retirement, at age 38, in 2001.

“That’s a good question,” he said.

He repeatedly expressed regret for his decision to use steroids, which he said was “foolish” and caused by his desire to overcome injuries, get back on the field and prove he was worth his multimillion salary.

“You don’t know that you’ll ever have to talk about the skeleton in your closet on a national level,” he said. “I did this for health purposes. There’s no way I did this for any type of strength use.”

I’ll give him credit for this though: McGwire actually called the family of Roger Maris to tell them first and apologize!

McGwire hit a then-record 70 homers in 1998 during a compelling race with Sammy Sosa, who finished with 66.

On Monday, McGwire called Pat Maris, the widow of Roger Maris, who had held the home run record with 61 in 1961, and admitted taking steroids.

“I felt that I needed to do that,” McGwire told Costas. “They’ve been great supporters of mine. She was disappointed and she has every right to be.”

Told by Costas that certain Maris family members have said that they now consider Roger Maris’ 61 the authentic home run record, McGwire responded: “They have every right to.”

When asked by Costas why he preferred to stand for the interview, McGwire replied “Are you kidding?  I’ve had more things poke me in the ass than Paris Hilton.  I don’t really poop any more, it just kinda ‘sweats’ out of me back there.”

We here at PK aren’t hypocrites though.  We advocated that Big Mac come out and just say what everyone already knew.  Stop acting like we are all morons and just say it!  He did.  We are cool now.  We aren’t going to be like some of the press that urged him to come out only to kick him in the jimmy when he finally did.

Stop by any time for a beer Mac!

Quotes and video clips via ESPN


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