Found older KMOV clip on YouTube last night.  It a clip of one of those “throw away” stories that all local TV news stations do about stupid things like a squirrel that can water ski or whatever.  This time it was about a monkey in Japan that roamed free and eventually took a cat hostage.

Take a peak (its all over at the 1:00 mark, the rest is just bad editing):

If you missed it, here’s a freeze frame of the kitten rape:

The female anchor there (don’t recognize her, anyone got her name?) apparently doesn’t think getting humped by a monkey 10 times your size in the bushes is definition of “harm” but we, and we’re guessing, the cat, would staunchly disagree!  We’re betting that anchor is fun at parties though.

My second favorite part is Larry Conors, explaining it by saying the monkey “had never seen a cat before, and just wanted to know what it was.”  Well Larry, we’ve never met, but if we do, I’d prefer and hand shake.

This sexy fella on the right is Officer Leon Pullen and he is accused of robbing 10 prostitutes and sexually assaulting at least three of them.

Using “online advertising” [Editor's Note: *cough* Craigslist! *cough*] Pullen lured his victims to North County city of Uplands Park where he worked as an officer.  According to one of the victims, after meeting up with a prostitute responding to his ad, Pullen took her money and performed oral sex on her against her will in the police station, court documents allege.

The FBI decided to nab Pullen because of, and no, I’m not making this up, “fear he was about to strike again.”

As opposed to all the other reasons rapists are arrested?!  Yeah, they were going to let him do his thing because the local FBI wanted to catch the big game on Saturday night, but then someone said “What if he rapes another hooker tonight?”  Well, crap.  Great questions Johnson, now we all have to go arrest him right now!  …pffft.  New guys!

Pullen’s attorney has already submitted evidence that the accused was certifiably insane and has already suffered enough by forcing his face in to the snizz of a prostitute, to which the judge was like “Eww!  Yeah, totally!”

…I was just joking on that last part, but wouldn’t that have been awesome?

via STLToday

This post has an update, see below!

Ryan Huff, a Production Director and Producer for all sports-talk station KFNS (590 AM) was arrested in Arnold and charges were filed that included raping underage girls.

Apparently Huff met the girls on “an internet chatroom,” which could mean anything since I’m guessing the reporter on the KMOV video I watched doesn’t know the difference between this very site and and actual “internet chatroom.”  After the meeting online, the two went to the movies, on a “date,” and then back to a house where they were joined by another 13 year old girl.  Shortly after her arrival they started partaking in sexual activity.  Huff’s alleged Playskool Orgy was noticed only after photos were taken and the girls where showing them around school!

Unfortunately for Huff, current Missouri state and federal laws don’t allow you to add the ages of your simultaneous sexual partners together to try to get a number above 18.

Check out the video (Because who the hell would ever want to link to an actual written piece?!) on KMOV’s website…oh and don’t fuck with Larry Conors.

Update (7/8/2009): Based on reader inquiries and lack of other coverage, we have an update to this story.  Check out that post here.