So remember when we celebrated “JC Corcoran Says Pujols Will Re-Sign Today” Day? Well that whole thing is still going on. No, not the actual day, that came and went with no Pujols news. What’s still been happening is all the chatter since then which came to a head yesterday after KTRS suspended Corcoran for two weeks, as was initially reported by STLToday, but was independently confirmed with our sources as well. The official word from KTRS has been a firm “No comment.”
Lets review how we got here, and we probably don’t have to tell you that it wasn’t a failed Pujols report that turned Corcoran’s mic off. It was probably this stuff:
You can’t say that to people! What if “HueJashole” is actually 60 years older than he probably is and owns a radio other than the one in his car?! He could be a possible purchaser for whatever it is that advertises on KTRS now that the Cardinals are gone! …seriously, what is it? Polident and collectable plates with Norman Rockwell paintings on them is all we can think of.
More specifically, according to our source, the last straw was Chad Garrison’s Riverfront Times post that listed several of Corcoran’s more choice Twitter replies, which explains Corcoran’s extra little venom-dripping tweets mentioning the RFT’s “idiot logic”.
Well that’s a good point actually. While there is certain validity to the argument that Corcoran is a public figure on a medium based on specific advertiser deals (read: not generic Google ads) and as such he should be keeping his, we’ll just say it, horribly lame insults to himself…but on the other hand, if someone’s being a douche, we’re certainly not going to get on your case for calling them out. Lets investigate by doing exactly what Corcoran suggests: Showing the whole conversation instead of just Corcoran’s reply.
Conversation #1:
First conversation out of the gate and it’s if anyone’s the douchebag in this conversation, it’s JC. First off, JC’s original tweet that starts this off is wrong. Dead wrong, and there’s no other way to see it. The source wasn’t “correct” since there was no deal announced on that fateful Friday. It seems more and more likely that Pujols will return, but Corcoran’s claim was that Pujols’ re-signing would be announced on Friday, and it wasn’t. tkooner makes a snide, but harmless remark and somehow that earns a “blow yourself”?
Corcoran falls behind early in the match!
Douche Tally: “Everyone” - 0, “JC Corcoran”: 1
Conversation #2:
…but it appears the score might be tied soon as Cardsfan47 comes out of the gate a little strong. We agree that Corcoran threw some shit at the wall and was probably a little surprised by getting burned by the MLB Hot Stove, but jesus dude it’s not like he took a shit on your dog. Anyway, Cardsfan47 starts off with a “fucking #moron” (nice selective use of hash tags) and then JC returns volley with his standard retort…but here’s where things get interesting. Cardsfan47 turns JC’s “blow yourself” command on it’s head by asking Corcoran to do the deed if in fact he is wrong, which is kinda funny…but then undermines it all with a homophobic joke with added homophobic hashtag because that’s the kind of thing you really want to be easily searched for later on.
Deuce!
Douche Tally: “Everyone” - 1, “JC Corcoran”: 1
Conversation #3:
Lastly, we have conversation #3 where stlcards314 is doing what lots of people do and arguably what Twitter was made for: bitching about stuff he doesn’t agree with. Once again, Corcoran, no matter what happens tomorrow, the next day or any other time, was wrong in his initial attention grab of a tweet and while he certainly got the attention he knew it would get, having people call you stupid is the price. Seems pretty fair. Corcoran must have pressed the “Dick Move on Twitter Easy Button” as here we go again with the douche-calling and the self-blowing so we’re going to have to give Corcoran another point…but wait! stlcards314 evens the score with the most out of left field insults to date: “How’s the ass raping gang bang of your mother going?” Well, that’s one direction we guess, but an ironic “yo mama” joke may have been a better play…actually lots of stuff would have been a better play. Frankly this is just sad all around as both of these guys let someone they don’t know over Twitter get under their skin over when some latino guys going to come back to town.
Douche Tally: “Everyone” - 2, “JC Corcoran”: 2
In the end the score was technically tied, but Corcoran is clearly the loser. While it’s a free country stlcards314, cardsfan47, tkooner and yes, even punchingkitty can make fun of stljccorcoran all we want on Twitter because we aren’t being paid by advertisers, sure he’s getting some press (lead story on “some local news channel”!) it won’t translate to much of anything in the long run. Frankly the “media” just isn’t as untouchable as they have been in the past (see Matt Sebek’s excellent article for more thoughts on this) and guys like JC have gotten really used to being “A guy on the radio!!!!”, but haven’t noticed they are now they are just “A guy on the radio.” It’s just not special any more…hell, head on down to KFNS where Crazy Dave Greene is running a sale on air time! Just ask and agree to work for free and you too can be “A guy on the radio.”
So what does all this mean for the mid-day shift at the Big 550? Our source says Smash will be taking over the time slot keeping the seat warm for Corcoran, but we’re not sure if that includes any extra-circular self-fellatio advice dispensing. It’s still unclear at this time if Smash will be alone or if Corcoran’s side kick, St. Louis radio mainstay, Trish Gazall will be on the air during Corcoran’s absence.
From JC and the Punching Kitty family to yours, go blow yourself you douche bag and happy holidays!
[Editor's Note: Here's the blanked out version of JC holding the sign for you Photoshoppers. If you use it, share your creation with us! @punchingkitty]
