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We gotta say St. Louis, we didn’t see many interesting costumes running around last Halloween. Sure there were the staples of Sexy Cat, Sexy Nurse, Sexy Bus Driver, Sexy Lunch Lady, Heath Ledger Joker… It’s not that we don’t like the “sexy” costumes…we love them! Keep it up ladies, you actually did pretty damn well last year. You keep on smushing up your boobs in to that nurse outfit, and us guys will keep drinking to help make the second teir ladies look first-string by 2am. The fellas however, need help. There is only so much Captain Jack Sparrow we can take every year. We did notice a guy dressed as a car jacker on Washington last year. What a great costume with social commentary undertones we thought! One long walk later had our feelings confirmed, St. Louis, you need help and we’re just the site to do the helping!

1. Zombie Tony LaRussa

“Need veteran brains!”

“Need to drive to California and think about direction of zombie team.”

…no Zombie Tony, this year’s Cardinal team weren’t technically zombies last year, but we do understand your confusion.

2. Larry Rice

This one is pretty easy: Throw a suit on your back, a dead animal on your head and go help a homeless guy…and then let the homeless guy go in downtown St. Louis and watch him with a smile as he breaks in to 4 cars.

3. Dan McLaughlin

This one is the scariest of them all! Don this mask, double-fist the drinks all night and then tell everyone how you’re “fine”. Don’t let people question your sobriety! Don’t they know who you are?! Ask them if they do…angrily!

(Oh yes sir, this is for real! Click on the preview below to get a full sized image suitable for printing at your office right now, cutting out with those scissors in your desk drawer and showing your buddies…and going home, throwing on a polos shirt and using this for your costume tonight. Do it! Do it! Do it!)

There you go. Three solid ideas for awesome Halloween costumes that will no doubt be a hit at any St. Louis party this weekend.

Were we wrong about last year’s crop? Do you have a great idea this year or, better yet, are you doing one of our awesome suggestions? We need those photos!

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City officials met with Larry Rice and his army of homeless guys Tuesday about the downtown Hopeville Tunnel. The tunnel is an old railroad tunnel under Tucker Boulevard that has become a makeshift homeless shelter for those both downtown and downtrodden for some time now, and Reverend Larry Rice is even known to direct people it’s direction. However, the city says the conditions are “inhumane” and the tunnel needs to be destroyed.

“What we have here are really inhumane conditions,” Siedhoff said. “I find it shameful that Reverend Rice would actually direct people into conditions like this.”

The Rev. Larry Rice of New Life Evangelistic Center is the tunnel group’s biggest advocate. He wants city officials to give an acre of land to the founders of ‘Hopeville’ at least until they can find better accommodations.

For one, we can’t even imagine how an ancient railroad tunnel being lived in by tons of homeless people can be anything but a hellhole at this time, so though we haven’t been there, we see the city’s point on that one. But yes, that sucks for the homeless people shacking up in that tunnel that now have less than a month to get out. No one likes to move. You have to beg all your friends for boxes and then when you get enough boxes it just bums you out because you know you could totally make a kick ass fort with all these, but you have to use them to pack up plates and stuff instead. Then you have to hire a moving company or do the thing yourself which totally sucks either way. Plus if you get your friends to help, its like you’re their indentured servant forever afterwards because they are always going to be all like “Yeah, I could get the next round…but I did help you move that one time seven years ago.” Plus there is…wait. These people are homeless! What do ya got? The 14 coats you wear at once, all year-long and maybe a shopping cart full of cans. If you have much else, you really ought to be thinking about selling some of it and moving up in the world.

Rice later released a statement that though his goal of packing more homeless in to an abandoned tunnel might not be working out, his “Go break in to the cars of the 22 year olds that spend all weekend at the Landing” program is working great.

KSDK talked with a Hopeville inhabitant who said “If you want to help, do more than just badger us or talk down to us like all we want to do is just beg for what we want, ask for what…” Shut up homeless guy!

via KSDK

More: YouTube video of Hopeville