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Governor Jay Nixon took down a big kill during his latest hunting excursion and in a freaking press release, has announced that he is donating the meat to the homeless. No word yet if the Governor plans on doing a press release if he gives a quarter to a bum at the Metrolink station.

Governor Nixon gave his kill to Share the Harvest, a program that allows hunters to donate their kills to be processed and then disbursed to local food banks and shelters. So far over 2 million pounds of meat have been donated to the program.

Though listed as an “8-point buck” in the press release, we both know that powerful men like the Governor don’t hunt deer like the rest of you chumps, his target is “the most dangerous game”…man. Homeless dudes to be exact. Looking closely at the press release it actually reads “8-point, Buck, a crazy guy that was wearing three coats at the time which slowed him down, thus only the 8 points.”  Of course, this human hunting plan will all come crumbling down when they pick a bad ass homeless guy like Ice-T not realizing how smart and strong he is… hmm…not sure how someone like that can be homeless actually. Ok, so rich guys show definitely not select any homeless guys that are too bad ass to be homeless, but for some reason, are.* Past stories may say that this plan will never work, but we’ll give him credit, he’s doing more work on the homeless situation than Mayor Slay.

When asked, Share the Harvest takes the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy to what type of meat comes through the door and frankly the phrase “homeless chili” is lost of most of the shelter’s dinner guests any way.**

via KSDK

* If you got this reference and have actually seen the horrible movie we’re talking about, we love you and happy someone else watches TNT at 3am on a Saturday night.

** We’re kidding of course, I’m sure they care. Not sure the homeless would care as much, but we’re sure they do.

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Did you hear the one about the guy that used Google Earth to find the best place to hunt deer, lined up his shot but missed, causing the deer to fall down a cliff and drown…and then totally take credit anyway like he did something special?

[Joe] Graber added the Internet to his arsenal, using the Google Earth mapping service to pinpoint paths the buck would likely follow to pursue female deer. It was raining Oct. 26, when the buck wandered down one of the paths by a creek at dusk. Graber was lying in wait.

From about 40 yards out, Graber let fly an arrow aimed at the buck’s lungs. But a tree deflected it, and the arrow ripped through the deer’s ear. The startled animal flipped into the air, slid down an embankment, fell over a 20-foot cliff into the water and drowned.

Nice.  You got em buddy.

Graber said other hunters later gave him some grief for how he scored the kill, suggesting he may not have taken a clear enough shot. He said he took what he thought was a sure shot at the buck’s chest, but he couldn’t have anticipated the deflection.

However, Chris Brown did give him a call to say “Nicely done.  I would have bit the deer too though.”

Apparently the dear he bagged scared and tripped down a cliff was a 25 point buck which is big or something which is impressive to anyone west of 270 and east of the river.  It’s all lost on us city folk, but we have a translation that might help: This is like when you do a drive-by shooting, and you miss but it ricochets off a mail box and scares the big fat guy you wanted to hit enough that he falls over and drowns in the big gulp he was drinking.

A kill’s a kill.  Plus that guy was straight trippin’ anyway.

via STLToday