It’s prom time, and high school girls all over the area are kneeling down only to be smacked in the face with some balls, but for one Festus girl, it wasn’t a euphemism this time:

Authorities said the 17-year-old girl threw the shot put and then went to retrieve it. Before she got completely out of the way, the next girl threw her shot.

The shot struck the girl on the side of the head. She was alert and conscious at the scene.

In an odd twist, the blow to the head appears to have made the girl the only  other person in the St. Louis area that thinks the Cardinals should keep Ryan Franklin as their closer. If she shows any further signs of severe brain damage, we believe that she will be required, by law, the move to Illinois and then get in front of us on the highway and start to change lanes three different times before breaking and heading back over to the original lane, only to miss her turn and decide that slamming on her brakes is the best course of action. We’d flip he off, but she won’t notice. She’s really busy with her phone conversation and manually rolling down the driver side window of her Ford Probe so she can flick her cigarette out of her car.

via KMOV

Hey kids of Timberland High School, you remember this: You mess with the bull, you get the horns.

The staff of the school newspaper and free speech honks that live for things like this filed in to a Wentzville School Board meeting Thursday night to hear a discussion of whether the level of censorship being displayed by the Timberland High School principal was within “acceptable” levels.  Apparently the kids have been feeling a bit censored for some time now. Things like…

At issue, everything from a tattoo article pulled from the paper to yearbook photos deemed too risqué. Legally, it is the principal’s prerogative to make these calls.

No one is arguing that the principal has the last call in his school, and we aren’t going to get in to that here. This is really about letting the kids put their argument out there, be heard, and have a rational discussion about it. Hell, they even cared enough to start a blog about the subject, and just wanted to be heard by the school board.

…of course by the time all the people on the other side of the coin got done blathering about how censorship is good, time was up and the meeting was over. Go home. F*ck you kids.

Seriously. That’s what happened.

Inside the board meeting, public comment began. The first speakers supported the idea of extra review for budding journalists. And then, because of a time limit, public comment was over before the free speech group got its turn.

The group filed out of the meeting disappointed, angry and frustrated.

Nothing quiets a group of angry kids down like promising them to let them be heard and then say “Nevermind, all the adults talked up your whole turn.” I’m sure a fair and balanced argument like that will definitely make the school newspaper think twice about running stories about tattoos or bubblegum or penny whistles…whatever it is kids want to write about these days.

Now to be fair to the school board, they did decide to allow one member from the group to defend their side of the argument before the meeting was adjourned.  Well gee, don’t go out of your way or anything you assholes. How the hell is hours of people talking about one side of the argument and then at the last second, saying “Oh yeah, you wanted to say something for your side…hurry up though.” is a fair shake?Why bother even having the meeting?! Why not just tell the kids “Hey, guess what? We don’t give a crap about what you think.” That’s clearly the truth isn’t it? Did the board not know about the time limit? Could they not just say “This is your last speaker, we have to let the other side have their time.” Nope. They might as well just done that thing when you blow in to your thumb to “inflate” your middle finger at the kids while they let a bunch of people talk that came because they are pro-censorship.

Its also worth nothing that a KSDK film crew was there, and just before they left is when the board had a change of heart to let one…one…high school representative say their piece.  Ya think the kids would have even got that if the KSDK crew wasn’t there? Pfft. Please.

Here’s a tip kids. Screw that school paper. Give us a ring, and we’ll happily set you up with timberland.punchingkitty.com. Write about tattoos all you want. Seriously: 314-266-8477

via: KSDK

Update: The Stop THS Censorship blog now has a post up about their school board meeting experience.

Jesus.  It’s come to this.  St. Louisian Jon Hamm hosted Saturday Night Live last night and dropped the old “Where did you go to high school?”  line to a national audience. Missed it?  We have the video below:

Yes, we know its just a line in one of those “last few of the night that really aren’t that good but if we don’t let the new guy get a sketch he’s written on the air soon he’s going to kill himself” sketches, but still this is getting out of hand.