The city of St. Louis is launching an advertising campaign to help with the chronic issue of car break-ins within the city limits.

The crime has blossomed in recent years, with the advent of GPS devices and MP3 players. The thrust of the new initiative is to alert motorists to not leave anything in sight inside their cars. The campaign will be managed through window posters and billboards paid for by the police department, a total of about $7,500.

The campaign announces “free beer,” or “free food,” or “free smokes,” indicating that’s what motorists offer when they leave valuables in sight.

The St. Louis tourism board must be thrilled.

Other aborted slogans for the campaign included “I hear the Royals are getting better, go park in Kansas City” and “Please police yourselves, because we’ve run out of options.”

Things like this make our city look horrible and more importantly waste funds that could be helping in other areas.  Clearly our fair city has a crime issue and we at Punching Kitty see no better option that creating our own Robocop!  He could patrol the streets 24/7 eating baby food and cracking down on car thefts and random ass shootings.  This is the perfect plan.  We realize the money on the table here is only $7,500 so the initial Robocop version would be more like a gun duct taped to the top of an radio controlled car toy than the movies Robocop, but look thats just version 1.0 dude.  Give the city a little more jack and soon enough we will have a robot with a human face walking around the city that can kill everyone but Mayor Slay and hopefully us for thinking of the idea.

via KSDK

Steven Jackson has responded to the heinous charges by his ex-girlfriend and mother of his son to TMZ:

The St. Louis Rams running back just released a statement to TMZ saying, “It’s disheartening that I have to address any alleged allegations 10 months later, but I have read the accusations made by Supriya Harris, and they are untrue.”

Jackson continued, “The accusations are especially hurtful because those who truly know me know that those actions would be out of character for me.”

Jackson acknowledged that Harris is the mother of his son, and described the boy as “a son that I love and that I willingly support emotionally and financially.”

Our thoughts? None of this crap is true.

First, beating the hell out of a pregnant girl is something thats so messed up that is usually comes out in the wash right away, not 10 months later.  Only furthering suspicions that this is all bull is the fact that he is already in a legal scrap with Harris about child support.  Sure would help her case if he looked like a pregnant girl beating meanie.

Lastly, wouldn’t this be something the police are interested?  We think so…except if there isn’t any evidence. Granted the Las Vegas police will probably open an investigation on this if it gets enough press because someone is always up for re-election, but if there was something real here, wouldn’t have there be work on this oh say, when it happened, not 10 months later?

Yes, if this is true, even a little bit, it would be bad for St. Louis and the Rams so I have a built-in slant. However, we have never heard even a single bad story about Steven Jackson so until some actual hard facts come to light we are on Team Jackson.

Also we hear that sometimes “bitches be trippin’!”

TMZ is reporting that there has been a claim filed in Las Vegas against the Rams All-Pro running back stating that during a 2009 argument…

“Steven became enraged and pushed me to the ground, repeatedly.”

“forcibly grabbed my arm and flung me against the door. I was crying and trying to protect my stomach from the blows, as I was 9 mos pregnant.”

and “continued to shove me against the door until his nephew … interceded and yelled, ‘uncle, she has a baby, stop.’”

A mere 10 days after the alleged beating, Jackon’s then girlfriend (she left him 4 months ago) gave birth to their son.

The two have more legal history as she is filing to get him to pay child support.

We have nothing but love for SJ39 recently, but this is even a little true, this is about as messed up as you can get.

TMZ is investigating and we will see what we can dig up as well.

via TMZ

Recently there have been some pretty messed up violent crimes going down in the trendy Lafayette Square neighborhood of St.Louis City, so about 20 people took to the streets for a rally against the violence.

Its all very sad and I hope what they did helps, but this lady above, picture on STLToday.com with the story is a horrible sign maker.

It starts off great with the big “Are you part of the problem?”,  but the sign takes a quick nose dive with the suddenly small, un-level and sometimes oddly faint writing below.  Take some time, think about your message first and then shorten it to 1-2 lines and for christ sake, use a ruler or something to keep the lines straight.

Maybe an example will help.  This is a good sign:

In fact, maybe just hire this guy and solve two problems at once.

Photo and Story via STLToday.com

Alvin Parks ran for and won the titles of Mayor and Liquor Commissioner of that turd of a city, our neighbors to the east that piggy-backs off of our name, East St. Louis.  Throughout the whole process however, Parks never did realize that East St. Louis is, in fact, a pit of booze, drugs, crime and despair.  All of a sudden Parks is “fed up” with the situation in East St. Louis, and he’s going to enact a plan to fix it:  Move up the ole selling liquor cut off.  It is now 1am.

In a statement, Mayor, Liquor Commissioner, Hotel Bellhop and whatever other hats the man owns said:

This notice comes most directly as a result of a sudden rash of major violence surrounding and/or stemming from some of our liquor selling establishments. Up to this point, none of the homicides for 2009 have been directly connected to liquor. We suddenly have two.

Wait…what?  I don’t even know what to do with this.  ”sudden rash of major violence?”  East St. Louis.  We are talking about East St. Louis.  ”Up to this point, none of the homicides for 2009 have been directly connected to liquor.”   What?!?!  How can this stat be said?  Do homicides that are directly connected to liquor have to be a murder committed with a broken bottle?  Every other murder ever that started with an angry guy getting drunk doesn’t count now?  Even if we can agree on that insane premiss, you really think moving the cut-off time an hour or so back is really going to help?   …the way we see it, it will just make the murders happen earlier at night.

Yeah, this plan is going to work out great.  Get those “two” drunken murders down to zero and East St. Louis will be perfect.

via KSDK

photo credit: The Siren Archive

This sexy fella on the right is Officer Leon Pullen and he is accused of robbing 10 prostitutes and sexually assaulting at least three of them.

Using “online advertising” [Editor's Note: *cough* Craigslist! *cough*] Pullen lured his victims to North County city of Uplands Park where he worked as an officer.  According to one of the victims, after meeting up with a prostitute responding to his ad, Pullen took her money and performed oral sex on her against her will in the police station, court documents allege.

The FBI decided to nab Pullen because of, and no, I’m not making this up, “fear he was about to strike again.”

As opposed to all the other reasons rapists are arrested?!  Yeah, they were going to let him do his thing because the local FBI wanted to catch the big game on Saturday night, but then someone said “What if he rapes another hooker tonight?”  Well, crap.  Great questions Johnson, now we all have to go arrest him right now!  …pffft.  New guys!

Pullen’s attorney has already submitted evidence that the accused was certifiably insane and has already suffered enough by forcing his face in to the snizz of a prostitute, to which the judge was like “Eww!  Yeah, totally!”

…I was just joking on that last part, but wouldn’t that have been awesome?

via STLToday

Through 2009 so far, the amount of all violent crimes have gone down 20% in St. Louis County according to this STLToday article.  No word yet if there was also 20% less beer purchased as well.

Areas patrolled by St. Louis County police are experiencing a dramatic drop in crime compared to a year ago, with all major categories down significantly through the first half of 2009, officials said.

County police report that murder, rape, robbery, aggravated assault, burglary, larceny, car theft and arsons all are down compared to the same period of 2008.

Alright guys!  Good job out there!  How’d the city do?

In the city of St. Louis, officials said reports on crime are mixed through six months. Crimes against people — such as robbery and assaults with guns — are up, with the notable exception of murders, which are down. Burglaries, larcenies, auto thefts and arsons are all down this year, according to the St. Louis police.

…dammit.  At least murders and arsons are down.  Of course if we could just figure out a way to cut the north half of our fair city off we’d be good…Albuquerque good!  Just take a look at the 2009 Murder map from STLToday below:

You’re really dragging us down North St. Louis.  Hey, how did we break East St. Louis away to something separate?  Think we can dust off that plan?

This post has an update, see below!

Ryan Huff, a Production Director and Producer for all sports-talk station KFNS (590 AM) was arrested in Arnold and charges were filed that included raping underage girls.

Apparently Huff met the girls on “an internet chatroom,” which could mean anything since I’m guessing the reporter on the KMOV video I watched doesn’t know the difference between this very site and and actual “internet chatroom.”  After the meeting online, the two went to the movies, on a “date,” and then back to a house where they were joined by another 13 year old girl.  Shortly after her arrival they started partaking in sexual activity.  Huff’s alleged Playskool Orgy was noticed only after photos were taken and the girls where showing them around school!

Unfortunately for Huff, current Missouri state and federal laws don’t allow you to add the ages of your simultaneous sexual partners together to try to get a number above 18.

Check out the video (Because who the hell would ever want to link to an actual written piece?!) on KMOV’s website…oh and don’t fuck with Larry Conors.

Update (7/8/2009): Based on reader inquiries and lack of other coverage, we have an update to this story.  Check out that post here.