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craigslist

Going Out

Now’s Your Chance to Buy That Homemade Submarine You’ve Always Wanted


Posted by The Editor on 08 Sep 2011 /
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You know how you’re always saying how “corporate” submarines are these days and you think stuff like safety checks and stringent testing just takes to soul out of the metal tube you’re counting on to survive while you’re under water? Well we found that “indie” submarine you’ve always wanted dude! It’s only $800, but you do have to drive to Jefferson County to get it.

This sub works very well. Used many times and can hold up to 4 people. (if you squeeze). Powered by propane and natural gas. If your interested call Andrew anytime [number redacted]

Not sure why he’s selling it though, as a good homemade submarine is really handy here in the middle of the continent. However, we hear those lifeguards at the pool can be real dicks about bringing stuff like this in there. Oh so that little girl can take like three water noodels, but no submarine?! If they let something like this in the pool it could be really popular for fat kids. It’s the ultimate shirt you wear in the pool! You could probably even store some snacks in there…maybe one of those rotating hotdog machines. Andrew has chosen to market it to four dudes that don’t mind squeezing in together though, so he’s going a different direction. Each to his own.

Speaking of which, here’s the photo attached to the Craigslist ad:

Can you freaking imagine 4 people in there? “If you squeeze”?! No freaking way. What four guys would ever want to squeeze in to something like that?!

…oh, right. Well that really shouldn’t count. Anyone can squeeze their 4-man crew in to a little yellow submarine if two of them are dead.

via Craigslist and our tipster who may or may not have been Ringo.


Happening

Won’t Someone in St. Louis Just Have Sex With This Woman?!


Posted by The Editor on 02 Aug 2011 /
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Poor girl, she just wants some lovin’. The only qualification is that you have to be a “good guy” but frankly after reading the rest of the her ad we’re pretty sure that he might even be flexible on that.

Oh and if you’re one of the zero single guys in the world that wants a random hook up to end in pregnancy? She’s cool with that too. Yea! High five bro! We can’t wait to have a pissed off 24 year old show up on our doorstep some day so we can say we found his mom on a Craigslist ad where she was “[R]eally just looking for anything.”

Very romantic.

via Reddit St. Louis


Happening

St. Louis Craigslist User Wants You to Help Make Cannabis…Uh…Man I’m Hungry?


Posted by The Editor on 27 Apr 2011 /
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…oh yeah…help make cannabis legal! Saturday May 7th! …don’t forget to get some Funyuns…maybe we can do some hooka afterwards since we’ll be in the Loop…oh dude, and then Fitz’s for fried pickles!

This is a classic “Oh man, lets try to get weed to be legal” move: Post a vague meeting date on Craigslist, make no mention of what you plan to do or accomplish and make the meeting for the hippiest part of town. This is either another in a long line of stupid Free Cannabis rallies, or the smartest sting the St. Louis County Police force has ever thought of. If this works, their next move is to talk about all the six year olds wandering around the Loop desperate for van candy.

via Craigslist


Happening

Damn That’s a Nice Coyote Hat


Posted by The Editor on 18 Apr 2011 /
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This Coyote hat, which is more of a full animal skin with a pocket for your head at one end than it is a traditional hat, can be all yours for $150! The sexy model does not come with the hat or, hopefully, at all.

We actually aren’t sure if this “hat” was actually something someone purposefully made this way, or a coyote tried to eat this slow-moving old broad one day only to choke and die while trying to swallow her head.

If your idea of a good way to blow $150 is to shove your head in the neck-hole of a dead animal skin, then this sounds like a good deal. It also sounds like a good deal if you just want to buy it to scare the neighbor kids or if you wanted something to wear to work on the days you have meetings with that vegetarian chick that just keeps going on and on about animal cruelty like you actually slaughtered your chicken nuggets in the parking lot.

via Craiglist and Reddit (bbr4nd0n)

[Full screen capture of the ad after the jump for posterity if/when the Craigslist link stops working]

(more…)


Happening

Craigslist: Searching for the Real Housewife of Jefferson County


Posted by The Editor on 04 Apr 2011 /
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We love a good farcical Craigslist post around here. *cough* So we’re glad we ran across this over the weekend and that someone had the forethought to screen grab it!

Have you dreamed of being famous? Are you a burgeoning socialite cougar with ambitions of making ti to the small screen? Do you frequently fornicate with members of your immediate family?

Sadly, this guy probably has an inbox full of submissions from every fat (but not Jefferson County fat, which everyone knows adds more pounds than a t-shirt scoop full of disposable cameras), stretch pants-rocking, side ponytail having, daycare/meth maker in the county.

via the Tip Line (full sized image here)

 


Happening

Love Lost and Found in St. Louis


Posted by The Editor on 08 Oct 2010 /
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From time to time we like to dip in to the ole Missed Connections section in St. Louis’ own Craigslist. Why? Because these things are crazy stupid. Like KSDK airing a show about Cardinals highlights Thursday night during prime-time stupid.

Denny’s South county (southcounty)

Attractive blonde sitting with I assume was her husband, couldnt keep from looking at you, very sexy.

Nothing like spending your dinner trying to avoid eye-contact from the creepy guy a few tables away that clearly never did get the hint to make Denny’s somehow suck even more.

my sexy big buck – w4m – 38 (always wet)

miss u already, wanted to spend the nite. sorry couldnt handle what i truly wanted from tonite. thx 4 tryn prob sum things unfixable, ruff def the trigger tonite. want u to make love to me tomorrow plz

Wow. Gross. Anyone have any freaking idea what “ruff def the trigger tonite.” is supposed to mean? Anyone want to draw us a picture? Also, if you were wondering, the town of “always wet” isn’t Chesterfield, its a reference to her vagina…or rather that sarlacc pit she pretends still resembles a human vagina.

send me a email satan – w4m

I miss you!

Crap. This one’s for us. Excuse us. …Look, we’re getting through our inbox as fast as we can. We’ll get back to you soon Matt Chambers.


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