Everyone’s favorite former local internet monopoly Charter, posted a loss of $85 Million dollars last quarter, bringing their total loses for 2010 to a whopping $237 Million. All this, just a year after Charter filed for bankruptcy. Things are going just great according to Charter though, you see the secret is playing high school basketball games. There’s you’re big ticket TV right there.

Charter is banking on big gains from their commercial business, but it’s pretty damn clear what Charter needs to do to get back in the black: Chalk Talk needs to get back on the air. Randy Karraker, Tony Twist, McGraw Millhaven…um…the black guy…all the great insight in to the local sports scene along with the added fun of spinning a wheel and distilling your insight in to a two or three words, poorly scribbled on a children’s learning to spell chalkboard. How can you not love that?! You’re in the hole for $237 Mil? Chalk Talk alone is worth at least $146.oo. Sure you gotta subtract from that the price of chalk…and the cost of making a new wheel if you got rid of the last one…but whew, can you imagine the excitement when people mis-key the channel they actually wanted and end up on the Charter local channel to find Chalk Talk where a bunch of out-of-work buddies make the standard “best fans in baseball” references between giggling about inside jokes? Hello windfall!

You’re welcome Charter.

Actually, try just throwing up the Indian Test Pattern too. Might be worth a shot.

via STLToday

Wait wait wait wait.  You are telling me that in this totally awesome housing market, the maker of St. Charles County’s most famous compound, with all those shiny new houses, isn’t doing well?

Totally.  Shocking.

Did you pick up on the sarcasm?  We were laying it down pretty thick.

Oh but apparently there is spin good news.  Don’t get me wrong, they are still totally going bankrupt, but apparently its the good kind or something:

In a statement on the company’s website, Whittaker says that despite “a nationwide decline in the housing market, an unyieldingly tight credit market and the overall uncertainty in the economy attributed to the global financial crisis” it wrote 98 contracts in the second and third quarters of 2009.

Hey look everyone!  We are the world’s tallest midget!

via STLToday.com

Charter, everyone’s favorite St. Louis cable monopoly, has filed for bankruptcy.  From STLToday.com:

Cable operator Charter Communications Inc. says it will file Chapter 11 bankruptcy reorganization documents by April 1.
As part of an agreement with debt holders, they will be paid in full and Paul Allen will maintain the largest voting interest in the company.

In a stark contrast to Monopoly rules, Charter will continue its “service” after filing for and throughout the bankruptcy process.

When asked if the quality of their service would take a hit because of the bankruptcy, Charter abruptly replied “No.  Seriously, how can we get any worse?”  …or at least thats how it went in my head.