There’s just too much meth news in St. Louis these days, so we’re just going to shrink two stories in to one so you can inhale them quickly, just try not to burn your thumb.
If you live in Maplewood and recently got your drivers license renewed then your ID might have been used to buy the ingredients for meth…but if you already buy stuff to make meth all the time then don’t worry about it we guess.
Between last November and January, [Mary Busch] is accused of taking eight victim’s licenses that were turned in for renewal at the Maplewood License Office in Deer Creek Plaza.
Busch is accused of showing those licenses at various Walgreens pharmacies, and forging the victim’s names on electronic purchase logs that track the sale of pseudoephedrine.
She claims she had no choice but to buy meth with the expired identification because most people just laugh at her when she tries to use her real name, Mary Busch, which sounds like a Christmas-themed porno.
Police are unsure whether Busch was using the pseudoephedrine to make meth or sell it. Her bail has been set at $15,000.
The police fail to notice that it’s also “hay fever” season, but man after that many Sudafed, you think you’d at least try a Claritin!
Frankly this seems like a better plan than most meth-makers can usually come up with, so in one sense we’re impressed, while in another sense, in fact all the rest of our senses (…yes, even taste because if you just think about it for a second…there you go, now you’re grossed out too) we’re pretty disgusted as usual with meth industry folk. Except for this guy:
Andy Dick is hilarious, and meth apparently only makes him stronger.
Remember the lady that cleared out a Walmart because they caught her making a batch of “shake and bake” meth in her purse? Well you’ll never guess what she’s was arrested for the other day!
Police said Jennifer Culp, 32, from Arnold, was arrested at the UGAS station in the 6100 block of Telegraph Road around 9:30 p.m. Monday. According to reports, Culp was in possession of a “shake and bake” meth lab.
Culp was arrested June 7 after a Walmart in south St. Louis County had to be evacuated when officers allegedly found a suspicious bottle in Culp’s purse. Culp was initially approached on suspicion of shoplifting, but officers later found a bottle inside her purse with a substance bubbling inside.
If you said “making more meth while running errands” then you win! Half points awarded to anyone that said “looking way older than she should” but while ugly people are a horrible scourge on this world, it’s not technically illegal (yet).
Carp remains in custody on $100,000 cash-only bond.
No matter her eventual fate at the hands of the justice system, Culp is already fielding calls from HGTV because despite what you may think of her hobbies, this crazy bitch is one hell of a multi-tasker. Next week she’s going to show us all how to make a lovely exercise yard flower bouquet for the prison guards while smuggling in a carton of cigarettes in her snizz. You won’t want to miss it!