Nameless Statues Appear in Front of Scottrade Center

It took a few months, but someone finally noticed the two statues of…some…uh…dudes in front of Scottrade Center. Hmm. We feel like we should know who these statues are of, but without proper name plates how the hell are we supposed to know? Hockey player statues need name plates ok?! NFL? Baseball? Totally different stories. St. Louisans can spot even a crappy likeness of Stan Musial a mile away, but hockey players? We love the Blues, but we need name plates. Ok, total shot in the dark here…is one of them Wayne Gretzky? He’s a big St. Louis icon from his epic time rocking a blue note!

Someone stole the metal name plates from the bases of the likenesses of hockey Hall of Famers Bernie Federko and Brett Hull.

Ah…ok. That makes a little more sense. Pro tip: Paint a gold mullet on the back of the hull statue and we’ll all get it sans nameplate.

KMOX found out the name plates were reported missing during the first week of April and police have been investigating ever since, but neither the team nor detectives had appealed to the public for help in finding the vandals.

You know what I bet the reason they haven’t found the vandals yet or “appealed to the public”? Because we have bigger things going on than some dude pulling the metal plate off of two statues with a big screwdriver. Plus if this is as bad as a St. Louis hockey fan riot gets, then that’s ok with us. Have fun you two! We’ve heard these things can get a lot worse than stolen nameplates:

via KMOX