Gladys Bergmeier of Jennings was found dead on February 7th in her little house amongst bags of papers, old magazines, plants and various items otherwise known as trash. Gladys was a hoarder, which if you ask cable TV, is all the rage these days. Well if it’s chic to be a hoarder these days, then ole Gladys really should have been a celebrity, because as she quietly went about the final weeks of her life Gladys was hoarding on another level! When relatives were going through her “stuff” they found…her mother!
Yup, Gladys was hoarding the mummified body of her own mother…who, by the way, was also named Gladys…Gladys Stansbury.
On Feb. 26, a relative helping clean out Bergmeier’s home came across the remains, wrapped in plastic and a multicolored curtain. The remains were partially dressed in a pajama top and camisole, and had a sock on the right foot. The remains had no broken bones or signs of trauma.
“It appears (Bergmeier) couldn’t let go (of her mother),” Haugen said. “This woman always had excuses as to where (Stansbury) might be. As time went on, people just stopped asking.”
That’s old people for you. Keeping things that have long since died around their house for no reason other than they’re used to seeing them: green and yellow wallpaper…wide ties…every pair of over-sized, odd-framed eye glasses they’ve ever owned…their long dead mother wrapped in plastic…hard candy…
Frankly we’re wondering how the how didn’t collapse on itself after the batter royale that must have happened in there between the dead person and general old lady smells. No way Febreeze has a chance in that fight. Sure, you’d probably try the old “breathe with your mouth” technique, but we hate that…makes us feel like we’re eating the stink now and that’s much worse. Breathing through your mouth in there would be like eating moldy cheese out of Louie Anderson’s butt crack…after he had just done like 30 squat thrusts…in a sauna…after eating ten of those sick ass looking shrimp tacos from Taco Bell. Oh you get it? Ok, we’ll stop.