Nobody Likes Ex-Cardinal Pitcher Brad Penny

Poor poor Brad Penny, he just wants people to like him, which in today’s society means he needs more Twitter “followers”. Apparently he needs as many as possible so that all the people in the world can enjoy Penny exploring the deepest caverns of the human existence on Twitter with questions like: “Any ideas on what movie we should c tonight?

He would come over and toss you a baseball but…you know…his arm might fall off which would mean trouble for the right-hander’s plans to get another team to give him millions for 3 or 4 starts and free access to the team’s training facilities. It’s like the best gym membership ever!

Of course, he could give the money back as one reply to his request for more followers suggested:

“How ’bout you send back 7.5m for your season o suck?” Zing! Now the smart man would just leave that be and not reply to this @jeffgentry13, but we’re talking about Brad Penny here. He always replies to Twitter jabs.

Yeah @jeffgentry13! Of course he’s not going to entertain the thought of giving the money he earned working out and not playing for the 2010 season.  If only there was a way to really let this guy have it, close the deal on this guy…you just need to think of the perfect insult. You can do this Brad Penny! What ya got?!

Nailed it.